Discipline for 20 month old

[melclaire1111]

How do people discipline their under 2's? DC is the usual toddler, 20 months, walking/running everywhere, starting to talk and in my eyes not naughty but very inquisitive and knows how to try and push boundries.

Partner and I have different views on how to tell DC off at this age. Tonight DC was playing with me on the floor, when DC got over excited and started pulling my hair quite harshly. I managed to untangle DC's hand fron my hair, sternly said no, was at their level and said you hurt mummy, you Don't do that, gave DC a second to calm down and then asked for a cuddle to say sorry.

Because I didn't shout at DC and in hubby's words make them feel like they had done the worst thing in the world he's now spent the evening shouting at me telling me how I parent wrong!

I actually Don't know who is right (of if there even is a right way!) So any advice would be great

[HappyHippyHippo]

You did great. I'm 100% with what you said.

As pp said, your OH is totally wrong about this.

Shouting/humiliation never helped anyone learn. It's true for older kids and adults as well as little ones.

OH and I would love to not shout at our kids and just quietly and firmly say 'no' if they are little. Or calmly explain/remind if they are bigger. But obvs we are human and if times are stressful we end up shouting. Our children's behaviour always deteriorates with our stress, obviously. We then make a pact to maximise praise and minimise "discipline" and the kids behaviour improves in a matter of hours.
OH similarly thought a bit more discipline was necessary at first but after seeing the magical effects on the kids behaviour of affirming the positive and keeping tellings off brief and quiet, we are both 100% convinced.
That doesn't mean we are very good at it but at least we now have the same goal! It took us a few years to figure out how to parent together as we came at it with different ideas and had to try them both out.

Stick to your method on this tho!

[OnTheRise]

You don't have to discipline a baby as young as this.

All you have to do is lead by example. So be kind, be loving, be nice. If he grabs at something correct him by removing his hand from the thing and saying, "No," and then distract him with something more appropriate. Model good behaviour for him.

You did things well.

Your OH is completely wrong. Shouting doesn't achieve anything apart from making the person being shouted at feel awful.