My 5 year old boy started a new school at the end of January and is apperntly beginning to settle. But other children are saying he is naughty and the teacher told me yesterday that he is being to boistrous for his piers and hurting them. He is big for his age, some of the children one child in particular is half is size.
A lot of the time he is joining in with rough play with the other boys one group in particular because he is the biggest the smaller ones generally end up being pushed over although he is doing the same as them (at lunchtimes) and other times he has pinched another child to stop them hurting a girl. he does that quite a lot he gets involved where he shouldnt.
he pushed over the small child in roleplay in class and he fell onto a plastic box resulting in a cut bottom. My child has had run ins with this boy previously where this boy was playing boxing and seeing who was the strongest and they grabbed each others face. The other boy got a scratch, apparently the apologised at the time to each other.
This is the one side of the problem he isnt hurting children out of anger or spite, but out of some misguided protecting them or because he is not playing gently enough and not thinking. (Not justifying what he is doing) we are constantly explaining/taking toys/early to bed etc to try and get the message through. He just does not think of the consequences, and it will begin to effect his friend making . He is really sensitive and his behaviour will spiral if he thinks he is being told off unfairly or if he is worried about getting into trouble he gets nightmares and cant sleep so we tend to have patches where he gets into a cycle of being overly boistrous and gets in trouble which increases the behaviour.
The other side is a maternal side where the mum of the small child is running to the school and have heard her forcing and leading explanations out of her child, when he clearly knows they were both playing. Because my son is so much bigger than hers i think she thinks he is bullying him when from what I can tell they are playing games they probably shouldnt be and they are both at fault.
It makes me feel isolated at the school gates and embarresed. I do speak to a couple of the other parents, but i feel like i constantly being watched. The other mum hasnt said anything to me and to be honest i wish she would so i could put people right. He has a baby sister and he is wonderful with her , he does what i say at home and is helpful, He is brilliant academically. He is mischievious and although does what i ask can struggle to stop when i tell him to stop doing something.
I dont know what to do. How can i make him be more mindful of his actions ?
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Behaviour/development
my 5 yr old over boistrous for his piers in school
littlelyon · 22/03/2013 12:14
Haha at me being a controlling mother 
try telling ds that. He play fights at home with his sister and us and with friends outside of school but afaik not at school or at least we've had no complaints and I know the school tend to be quite tough on this kind of thing. I didn't assume you were doing nothing I just asked a few questions, I didn't assume either way.
Anyways I don't actually really care what you think of me but I hope you get your little boy sorted out and he's happy at school.
Oh and also I was trying to help by asking about motor skills because of personal experience as I explained - I genuinely thought it could be an issue when he's doing things like hugging too hard and also, I think you mentioned putting things down roughly etc.
The thread is about a child hurting his peers at school so the whole topic under discussion is play fighting being taken to a level where other children suffer 
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