Gina Fords 'potty training in one week' - is it ever really that easy???!

[mumsgonemad123]

so i read Gina Fords little book from cover to cover, decided that my twin boys, aged 2 years 5 months were definately ready according to her criteria, and decided that Christmas time would a good time to start as no tots groups for nearly three weeks, nothing much planned, all shopping done, family all live very local and hubby off work, an ideal time to be at home and really concentrate on it. Was hoping that by Christmas day we could be over the hump so to speak.

End of day one today and i am completely frazzled and really not looking forward to tommoro!! one of the boys managed one wee in the potty all day and the other boy managed nothing. My boys are VERY lively at home and kind of feed off each others energy, running and bouncing around and that is the main problem, just cant get them to be calm enough to sit on their pottys. Its frustrating cos i know they are ready, they are very verbal and talk in complete sentences, very capable of understanding instructions etc, old enough now to have some bladder control, etc, etc, but they are livewires and just wild at times to be honest, i talk to them and they just dont listen, completely shut off from what i am saying usually cos they are interacting with each other.

I would really appreciate any advice, success stories, moral support, any input really. Am i being unrealistic to expect any success on the first day? anybody think Gina Fords method is flawed? Should i be waiting till they are closer to 3 years old? help please!!!

[bonkersLFDT20]

Have not read the Gina Ford book, but I wonder what her criteria are because it really doesn't sound like they're ready. If they are not ready to listen to you or showing signs that they are keen to use the potty or wear pants then you've got a massive job ahead of you!

I'd wait to be honest. If they're getting there physically, once they are ready to cooperate then it will be really quick and easy.

My DS1 was like this. I knew he knew what to do, he just did not want to do it, was quite content in his nappy. He trained at over 3 years old, but it was a breeze because the motivation came from him.

DS2 was a different story. He is very responsive to motivation, praise, being like his peers etc so was really keen to learn what to do. He trained at just over 2 but it's been a much longer process because I have to keep on top of reminding him, praising him etc etc.

Honestly, when they're ready there is no hill to climb, it's a more natural process where everyone is happy and proud. You DO NOT want potty battles with twins...they'll "win"!

[FunnyLittleFrog]

Seeker is completely right, wait until they instigate it. We waited and DD said she wanted to wear knickers just before she was 3. Other than a couple of tiny accidents when she has been over excited she has been dry ever since. Completely dry at night too from a week after she went nappy less in the day.

The fact that your boys haven't managed it means they are not ready, depsite what GF may think.

[Llareggub]

Definitely leave it unil they tell you. I did that with DS1 and he ditched his night time nappies at the same time. At some point, Ds1 taught DS2 to wee standing up so I've ditched potties too.

[googleberry]

My little boy was really easy just over a week, he was just two at the time and decided he wanted to do it, I was pregnant at time so was gonna wait bit longer but he was insistent, my daughter was nightmare was over three took forever and dribbles now she is five, my little boy who is three now is still better than her

[brettgirl2]

I used the Gina Ford book but think her criteria are optimistic to say the least. For it to be straightforward:

• They have to be willing to poo and wee on a potty not just sit on it.
  
• LO needs to choose the time, eg by asking to wear pants/ have nappy removed so they can use toilet.

[DestinationUnknown]

ds was ready at 2.6 according to Gina. but not according to ds, who had not read the Gina book ... that attempt was stressful, messy and lasted about a day.

at 3.1 he said he wanted pants one day and that was that, literally. One accident in the first week. One dip a few weeks later when he kept leaving it too late to go to the loo (4 times in a day!! I heard him saying to himself "Oh no not AGAIN!). That attempt caused no stress whatsoever!

[ss145118]

We did it in a week- ds was 2.4. I started by having potties stationed in a few places and wearing no pants or trousers. Then progressed to pants a week later. If it hadn't worked so well without the pants I wouldn't have perservered and would've waited until he was ready. There were a few accidents but not many. It sounds like your 2 aren't ready- I'd agree with the others that it's easier to wait until they are ready then it's quicker and less stressful.

[MissPricklePants]

my dd is 2.7 and is not ready to be potty trained. My hv said the best time to do it is when the child can feel they need a wee or poo, not when they have done it. I am in no rush to train dd. She has just started telling me when she needs changing which is a start!

[littleducks]

I cant remember the GF criteria, it was a long list iirc including something about walking up stairs???

I trained both my at 2.5ish and wouldnt say a week to ten days is over optimistic, both went straight to the toilet with special seats and a stool. Search the archieves for Cod's bootcamps, they were very sucessful on here at the time.

That said I 'm not sure xmas is a good time, surely its all abit too exciting for them at?

[nethunsreject]

I waited till ds1 asked to wear pants. He was 3 and was dry day and night in 4 days.

Fuck knows what ds2'll do though

[GoldFrankincenseAndTwiglets]

Another fan of waiting here, too. Both my two were over 3 - almost 3 and a half - and both did it within a weekend (and DD was also dry at night within a week). Definitely wait til the summer holidays and just let them be in the garden with a potty out there.

[MmeLindor.]

I am with Seeker.

First, you may be having a "low key Xmas" but they will be excited and distracted.

Second, there have been studies done (our kindergarten teacher told us about them) that children are who start earlier are generally not reliably potty trained earlier. Obviously there are exceptions but on the whole if you wait until they are truly ready then they are trained within a day.

There was no way I was going to stay home and ask the DC every 10 minutes if they needed a wee, then spend days changing trousers and sponging wee off the floor.

Being able to physically feel that you need to wee is something that comes at different times for children so you may think that they are ready, going by the other indicators, but you do not know.

[mrspepperpotty]

I used the GF book with my DS1 and found it a useful guide as long as I ignored the timescales - my DS1 took a lot longer than GF promised! We got there in the end with some setbacks. He was 2y 2m, and I did it around Xmas for the same reasons as you. My DD was the same age and was one of those dry-by-day-3 success stories. Twins must be v stressful - good luck!

[MrsDobalina]

I've just tried gf with DS 2.6. Gave up after 4 days. He had no issues with physically weeping or pooing in the potty, he just didn't want to. And didn't care about rewards etc.

Having read that book endlessly, didn't it say somewhere to do twins one at a time (may have been hallucinating, quite sleep deprived )

I'm waiting. I don't actually mind nappies and I just can't get my head around how to make a child use the potty if he just can't be bothered/doesn't want to

[mumsgonemad123]

well day 2 and we decided overnight that it would be better to train twins one at a time! So we picked the one who showed more readiness and today has been a huge improvement. No stress at all really (compared to the nightmare that was yesterday, lol) and he did 3 wees and his one and only poo in his potty. RESULT!! he had 5 or maybe 6 accidents all day, all wees.
I do feel justified in going for it now really. Time will tell and its early days but all the signs today seem to be that he IS ready. 10 minutes before he pooed he said ' i wanna do a poo poo on my potty' then just sat there for 10 whole minutes till he did it. i was amazed!!
TBH my feelings on potty training is that i just want to get on with it and get it done. We use disposable nappies and not only is the weekly cost at the supermarket horrendous, the sight of them all going into our wheelie bin and then to landfill is awful too when you stop and think about it. We have a gas fire so cant burn them like some people do!! I want to enjoy my spring and summer with my boys dry and in pants. I also know another mum of twin boys who left it till nearly 3 and says she wished she could turn back time and go for it earlier, they ended up not being dry till well past three and i think she ended up feeling kind of burdened by it all, and a little pressurised from her pre-school provider.

[mumsgonemad123]

OP here again. Forgot to say thankyou to everyone for comments, keep them coming!! Although TBH i am a bit surprised at the lean towards the opinion of waiting till aged 3ish or later on here as on the other potty training thread more people are suggesting that i should just go for it and stick with it. I cant imaging my boys starting at their preschool place in September at aged 3, still in their nappies. Surely that is not the norm???

[Janni]

Kids pick up potty training really quickly once they're ready and frustratingly slowly if you try to get them to do it before they're ready. Gina Ford doesn't know your children - you do. All you need is some guidelines in your head of how other parents have approached it and then follow your own instincts and what you know of your children.

[pretendhousewife]

Try it. If it doesn't work, send Gina Ford all his soiled clothes until you get your money back for the book.

This woman never lets up does she. One day, a traumatised child will sue her for a dysfunctional childhood. Oh yes.

[BlastOff]

but it's not easier once they are potty trained OP. It's a pita dropping everything and trying to find a loo quickly and with little warning. Especially so with two I'd have thought.

And I honestly don't understand why you think you'll enjoy spring and summer more with them not in nappies?

But , each to their own and all that, although I'm not sure your ds sounds 'ready' from what you've said. No doubt you'll be able to 'train' him, but it could be a lot less stressful for all of you if you were to leave it a bit longer and not bow to some non existent social norm.

[seeker]

Honestly, waiting is the best thing. What advantage is there to pushing it- making your lives stressful and having wet carpets when in a month or so it'll happen practically automatically?

[bonkersLFDT20]

OP, it sounds like your DS IS ready!
Maybe his brother will follow his lead.

Blast Don't you think there is some social pressure to get your children in underwear? I think most parents must feel this pressure when they have a child over the age of 3 still in nappies.
It also just looks nicer.

[seeker]

Resist the pressure! Easy lives for all is what we're aiming for.

[MmeLindor.]

I think that there is less pressure now than there used to be, as people have realised that the earlier you start, the more work it is.

I had friends who were desperate to get their child off nappies, and had weeks and weeks of wet pants and accidents. I let it go until DD was 2.5 (had new baby) and then my MIL took it upon herself to potty train her. She said, "lets not put a nappy on today" and that was it.

DS was the same, but slightly later.

If your nursery is making a fuss about a child still being in nappies, you need to look for another nursery because a childcare provider should know that not all children are dry by aged 3 years.

[brettgirl2]

OP I dont believe in the 'three is a magic number' leaving it till late. My daughter trained easily at 2.4 read the potty training thread and there are people having nightmares at 3. FWIW one of your twins sounds ready to me and the other not. There are lots of people who start, when for example their child is scared to do a poo and then wonder why they spend 3 months scraping poo out of pants. Life's too short!

[PrettyCandlesAndTinselToo]

I used GF-style toilet-training (ie straight into pants, no pull-ups and no more nappies at all while awake) with all three of mine.

Ds1 at about 2.5y trained in 48h. I had tried nearly a year earlier, because he was articulate, understood what was expected of him, and co-operative. We gave up after 3 days because there was no improvement, and because his 'misses' were upsetting him. Clearly he had been intellectually ready but not physically ready.

Dd took 3 ghastly, guilt-ridden weeks at about 3.3y, was never really dry, and 2y later was diagnosed with a bladder malfunction that requires long-term medication.

Ds2 took 3-4 days at about 2.3y. I was, however, in tears by the time I put him down for his afternoon nap on the first day. It had been worse than with dd. But on the second day things seemed to have clicked, and we had improvement from then on.

So IME GF works if the child is both physically and intellectually ready.