Choosing a name your mum hates

[broodykg]

Hi all,

So basically from the day we found out we were pregnant my OH has been referring to bump by a boys name which I hated originally but now I love it. Anyway we know that his mum hates it because it was a name my OH's brother considered for their twin boys.

Part of me just thinks she will get used to it but just wondered if anyone else had a similar situation?

We don't actually know is a boy so it is a just in case.

And to be fair she openly says she still doesn't really like one of the names OH's brother chose for their twins!

It's come up in conversations with friends and they all like it (not that we told anyone it was the name we liked) but I also think my mum wouldn't be very keen.

[Canyouforgiveher]

wouldn't tell her in advance and wouldn't care what she thought. Did she consult anyone about naming her children? - I thought not.

[katemess12]

My grandmother is very vocal about names she hates. She had no reservations about telling us she didn't like the name we chose, but it was too late, we'd already had the baby and named her. She had no reason to hate the name we chose: it's a perfectly acceptable, normal name which had its previous peak in popularity in the 1900s-1920s.

She did say that she'll get used to it though, and I'm sure that she will. But in the meantime I give no shits that she doesn't like it. She named her three children with no input from anyone else, so she's got no right to interject her opinion with other peoples' children.

[Batteriesallgone]

Just to give another angle...We told everyone the name when I was pregnant after we knew it was a girl or boy, both times.

We did this because a relative did the whole 'announce when they're born' thing, and the family all brazenly said how much they hated the name and really really really upset her and her DH. My in laws are not known for their tact.

We got a few mutterings of 'ridiculous name' etc but nothing too bad. Used to it by the time baby arrived. Can't imagine anything worse than someone being a bit rude about my lovely baby's name when I'm a hormonal post birth mess.

[CodyKing]

I think it's a generation thing really - all come round on a cycle - look at all the eves Eva Evie Lilly Milly all very common now -


My mother would have hated these 'old people' names as her great grand etc would have them

Mom hates DD2 name and we knew she would!! Can't get work up about it as DD2 loves her name

[Olbersparadox]

It's your baby, everyone else can just jump off a cliff. My FIL hated the name we chose for DD2 and even said it out loud that it was very horrible choice. Guess what, we went with what WE loved. She's our daughter not theirs. They had a chance to name their own kids.

[MamaLazarou]

My mum was very rude about my DS's name when he was born, but she likes it now, because it is his, and she loves him.

Ignore, smile, nod, and do your own thing!

[septembersunshine]

I wouldn't pay any attention to her. She had her chance with her baby and now it's your turn. My mum sent me this card with name suggestions in (Nigel/Trevor... that kind of thing). Lets just say these names were not to our taste and also why do people think they have a say about the name you use?!! We picked what we wanted and told them when he was born and that was that. Don't tell anyone (even friends). Announce the baby name when s/he is born!

[Glitterspy]

You can't win with trying to please people on names. My mum suggested several names before I had DS (unprompted, thanks mum ) and as it happened we chose one for DS.

She then spent the first 6 months weeks of his life suggesting other names, saying she's read online the name means xyz (often rude or offensive).

Just choose the name you like and to hell with what she thinks. As pps have said she'll get used to it.

[FurkinA]

Make up a fake name (Daniel, you can't argue with Daniel) and then say you changed your mind last minute. After you've done the paperwork... They can say what they want then and you can tell them to not be so fucking rude

[DerelictMyBalls]

Who cares what she thinks? She'll get used to the name soon enough when it's the name of one of her favourite people. Ignore!

[eyebrowsonfleek]

I think that unusual names can grow on people. I remember thinking about Brooklyn Beckham's name but now I'm used to it, it doesn't give me that kind of reaction any more.
As long as you don't spell creatively or create a new name, most names should be fine. After all, Rose West hasn't stopped Rose being a popular name has it? Our children's generation are used to a more much wider variety of names than us. Our local primary has children called Zeus, Ocean, Wish and Khaleesi and those sorts of names are normal for their classmates.

[minipie]

I told my mum the name we were considering for DD2, she was rather negative about it.

I asked her for some names she likes. I hated all her suggestions! So I decided she has shocking taste and went with the name we were considering anyway

Though as it turns out, we all call her a completely different nickname anyway...

[CarrotVan]

My mum hates my top choice for a girl's name - not her child, not her choice

[Enkopkaffetak]

When ds was born and I announced his name my mothers reaction was " That's HORRIBLE" FFW 11 years and she was visiting and she said " I always liked the name Conrad, its such a strong name"

She got used to it. Would have denied ever saying it was horrible.

I laughed didn't care as Dh and I loved the name and it suits him.

[Alisvolatpropiis]

Ignore her.

My mum said the name I floated as one of two top contenders was "very boring", when I was pregnant. We did indeed use that name and she denies ever saying it

[ExcellentWorkThereMary]

When I was pregnant with DS1, early days, my mum told us all at a family dinner that a friend of hers had just become a grandparent, and told us the name of the child - everyone round the table except me and DH went "oh God why would you do that to a child" etc, DH and I were very quiet as it was top of our names list. We did indeed use the name and when we announced it, apparently everyone conveniently forgot how much they hated it and told us what a lovely name it is. Ironically it is actually really popular now!
My mother in law actually told me she didn't like DS2's name and she would be using a short version of it instead. I said, I wonder if he will think it strange that you call him something different to everyone else? And left it. She never bothers with us anyway so she rarely has to say his name.

My mum told me that my dad's face "was a picture" when I told him on the phone the name of his third grandchild. He didn't like the name, my mum felt it necessary to tell me he didn't like the name.

I adore all my children's names! They like them too, they've never (yet) encountered teasing or people being mean about their names. Only ever compliments!

[augustusdecimus]

Why would I care what my mum thinks? She obviously didn't care what I would think when she picked mine!

[RabbitSaysWoof]

No one liked my DS's name, now lots of people have told me (unprompted) that they now love he's name and it really suites him. He now has a baby second cousin with the same name.

[BeingATwatItsABingThing]

Urgh! "And myself because I hate this too" was meant to be crossed out.

[BeingATwatItsABingThing]

I always liked a particular name for a boy but everyone else said they didn't like it. That wouldn't have stopped me. When I met my DP and found out we were pregnant (just to annoy Dozer and myself because I hate this too), I mentioned it and he hated it too. That was the only reason I stopped considering it. We had a DD anyway which was a relief because we could never agree on a boy's name.

[DragonboysMum]

I knew my Nan would hate DS4's name as it was the name of a relative of hers she really hated.

However, she'd been really vile about a name we were going to use and had put me off it because of her nasty comments. So I used the hated name. DP and I love it and decided we couldn't give a damn what she thought. Her reaction when I told her was predictable - she hit the roof. Still makes comments about how much she dislikes it and how could we saddle a sweet baby with such a horrible name every time she sees us.

At the end of the day it's your baby. If you like the name bollocks to what anyone else thinks!

[chocoLit]

My mum hated the names with have DD1 & DD2 and was very vocal about it TILL she hit used to them.

She passed away two days before DD3 however I'm confident she'd have HATED her names too. Even my aunt said 'you can't call her that' so naturally we did.

None of mine have weird/nonsense names. No pleasing some people. YOUR baby, YOUR choice

[ohidoliketobe]

IME this is what happens when you discuss names before the baby is born. Everyone has an opinion on names prior to the baby's birth, but of you just present the baby and say 'oh and s/he's called X' no one tends to comment as they're top transfixed on the baby!
Back to your MIL however. She had the opportunity to name a son, twice. This isn't her child. Smile and nod, recite 'you had your chance to name your children'. My nan pulls a face at a lot of names. This is a woman who called one for her children Brian

[OhFuds]

My mum didn't like 2 of my dc's names. My baby, my choice. I don't really care as it's names I love.