...to feel a bit peeved?

[whispywhisp]

Ok...so I work, part-time, as a Home Help...I love my work and love the ladies/gents that I go to who are either elderly or infirm, or both. The hours I can manage and the cash is extremely useful.

The company I get the work from rang me today to offer me some more clients - I replied that yes I'd love to do them but to bare in mind that in a few weeks the kids are off for 6 weeks summer.....(I have two children, both at school). They then replied that they wouldn't offer me the work if I can't keep them permanently and unless I can arrange child-care cover for the Summer holidays they wouldn't let me have the work even for the next few weeks. They asked why I have no one who can have the kids (DH's parents cut their ties years ago, my sister and brother really aren't interested in my kids and my Mum won't even have them and I have asked quite a few times in the past)...and could I not do all the ladies on one day and just get someone to have the kids for the day?...WHO? I don't have anyone. All my mates have parents, in-laws, various members of family who help them and I don't have any mates who aren't already busy with their own kids. I asked why they wouldn't atleast let me do the work, even for a few weeks and they replied because they like continuity.

I am fed up, absolutely fed up, with me being on constant call for the children - yes I love them dearly but its always ME who has to manage, constantly juggle and desperately needs to work for the money. We can't live off DH's wages all the time.

I see there is a thread running at the moment in Chat concerning how wonderful parents-in-laws are....its a lovely thread to read but I've never had that help and at times like this I find it really hard to keep going.

[Heifer]

I'm in same the boat in a way because we don't have any parents or parents inlaw as they have all passed away.

However, at the moment I can't find a part time job so don't actually need cover.

When I did work and when I will work I will put DD into a holiday club some days and DH will take annual leave.

Google around, there are bound to be holiday clubs, some more expensive than others, and tbh it may be more than you earn some days, but I found last year it was worth it in the long run.

[whispywhisp]

I have looked at kids clubs but they're so expensive. They run one at the school my kids go to - it costs something like £20 a day per child. That'd be £100 a week for me and I only earn about £60 a week. I would dearly love to go and get a normal job - something in an office but who is going to employ me knowing I need all the school hols off?

[mice]

Sorry that you are feeling sad and don't have any family help with your children.

Have you looked into any childcare over the summer? Do the school have a holiday club or anything that you could use?

Although it is inconvenient for you - I can see the need - or desire for continuity in carers, and there are so few jobs that can fit solely around school hours.

Not everyone has great helpful families, my in-laws have never helped with my children and any childcare I have managed over the years has been begged from friends or paid for.

YANBU for feeling peeved - and for feeling tired always looking after the children. You are not alone and there are many of us who have felt like that at times.

But you do need to look at the bigger picture and find solutions. Not everyone who works has family that look after their children, most people have to pay for childcare - and even if that means you get less money over the holidays, it means you would have work now and after the 6 weeks are up, and it also means that the elderly/infirm people you care for get the continuity that they deserve. I hope that you can work something out.

[whispywhisp]

Thanks mice. I love my job. I love to be able to help those remain in their homes without having to go into residential care - I like to do my bit to keep them independent. I have a number of friends who work - they all have atleast one person who can help them out with their kids...a close friend of mine has her Mum, her Mum-in-Law and her sister....I don't have anyone. If I'm ill - tough! If the kids are ill its me who has to go and get them from school or stay at home with them. We desperately need the extra money...we live off DH's wages. The playground is often quite full of Grannies and Grandads...where are they for my kids? DH leaves for work by 7am, rarely home much before 7pm. I do feel very much as though I'm my own...battling through. Maybe I'm just feeling very sorry for myself but to not be given work NOW because I won't be able to maintain it during end July/August, when they could quite easily cover it for me has really annoyed me today.

[123andaway]

Are you not entitled to the childcare element of working tax credit?

[HappyMummyOfOne]

If you know you can keep the extra work if you get childcare, then thats what you need to do. I can understand why they would like to give their clients continuity.

We both work and have to pay for childcare, its just something we accepted as we chose to have DS.

Not everyone has family that can give free childcare and, to be fair, why should they.

[whispywhisp]

I agree why should family help but I have never had any help, in all the 12 years I've been a parent. I never even have anyone who offers (family wise) - friends offer but they have enough to do themselves with their own kids/work etc. I was desperately ill about 8yrs ago, my eldest child was about 3 at the time - I was ill and in bed....I rang my Mum for help to see if she could take my DD off my hands just so I could get some sleep and her reply was...'Why? X (DH) will be home soon'....'you'll be ok'.

And as regards child tax credit - the work I do is cash in hand work and I don't declare it because it is such irregular work and I only do it as and when required - plus the client pays me themselves.

[faerie07]

They've offered to let you do all the clients in one day over the school holidays, so that would only be a club for one day a week, wouldn't it? It would be tiring but wouldn't it be worth it?

[fireupthequattro]

If you work days can you take the kids in occasionally?

They might learn something and old peeps generally love spending time with kids.

Can your husband take some holiday time? Aren't you entitled to holiday, or don't you accrue it?

The local leisure centre in our town offers activity weeks, sports and crafts and it's not expensive. Do you have these facilities?

Don't be afraid to ask friends. I am SAHM at mo and always help working mums with school ending early etc, mainly because a couple fo kids are easier to manage than one moaning he's bored. You could always offer them a tenner or something?

[HappyMummyOfOne]

You're working cash in hand yet still begrudge paying for childcare?

TBH, I lost any sympathy when you mentioned the cash in hand part.

[whispywhisp]

Happymummyofone? Why begrudge because I get paid cash in hand? What difference does that make?

[MillyR]

It is illegal.

[HappySlapper]

Hold on a minute - you earn £60 a week but you don't declare it?

[whispywhisp]

That is how the organisation I get my work from operate....they give us the clients and it is up to us to work for the clients and they pay us themselves, direct. Sorry but I don't understand how you can link that to me not wishing to pay for childcare? I don't earn enough to pay for childcare...I would be working at a complete loss and no-one, in their right mind, would go to work and hand all their earnings, and more, to someone/organisation that is looking after their kids in order for them to work.

[MillyR]

If they are paying you and it is not going through an employer, then you are self employed. It is illegal not to declare such income.

Unless there is a loophole I am unaware of.

[fireupthequattro]

But you are only talking a short period of time, so paying out more than you earn for 4 weeks so you can keep the job for 52 weeks surely?

[whispywhisp]

No I don't declare it. I don't have to either. It is irregular work - some weeks I may have two clients a week to go to, some weeks I have nothing...all depends on whether they go into hospital or simply don't need our help anymore. That's the nature of the work and no, it isn't illegal, thank you.

[HappySlapper]

It doesn't matter who pays you the money though

You are still earning £60 a week. Do you claim benefits?

[MillyR]

It is illegal.

From this site:

www.direct.gov.uk/en/MoneyTaxAndBenefits/Taxes/WorkingAndPayingTax/DG_10010537

[whispywhisp]

Happyslapper - no I don't. Never have.

[whispywhisp]

Thanks for the link. But I don't get paid by my employer. Therefore I do not declare it.

[schroeder]

If they do not take tax (paye) off your earnings you need to fill in a tax return at the end of the financial year.
It's a pain and all that ,but if you are only earning about £60 a week you will not have to pay tax anyway.

[whispywhisp]

I have no entitlement with this job...ie paid leave, sick pay etc etc....if I don't work, I don't get paid.

[MillyR]

So read the whole page linked to. If you are not an employee then you are considered by the Government to be self employed. You have to fill in tax returns even if your income is below the tax threshold.

[HappySlapper]

whispywhisp, all due respect, like, but what a crock of shit! You don't get paid by your employer?? It doesn't matter who hands over the cash, you still get PAID