To think that people on benefits can dress as nicely (or not) as anyone else

[Elephantintheroom]

I went for an eye test yesterday. The optician's receptionist asked if I was on any benefits, as if I was, I may get a free eye test. When I said that I wasn't, she looked me up and down and asked if I was sure . 'Yes' I said, 'I am quite sure.' and I didn't say anything but I was annoyed.

I am a consultant but I wear jeans and a jumper when I am not at work like anyone would. I am first to admit that I need a wardrobe makeover but I thought her attitude of 'people that dress like you can only be on benefits' was ridiculous and judgemental.

So AIBU? Has anyone else come across this lately? We moved to a new area recently so maybe it is a feature of the new place??

[StealthPolarBear]

well done BY I bet she was all of 16 too

[BoneYard]

When i opened my account card at Staples the girl behind the counter said TWICE to me:

"You have to have your own business to have one of these"
"I know i do"
"But your own business as in self employed right?"
"Right"
(she stares at my paint splattered scruff as if a painter or artist or anyone who works manually or with crafts can possibly have their own business)
"soooo....do you?"
"Yeeeees"
"And you need your own business bank account"
"Yeeees"
Then (and this is a true story) i point at the rather hansome besuited chap next to me and say
"Don't judge a book by it's cover, this young gentleman looks lovely in his suit and may or may not be self employed but i am and you wouldn't say the same to him would you?!
She gave me my card but i was fuming!!!

[chegirlknowswhereyoulive]

This has reminded me of the midiwife who told asked me if I was bottle feeding and when I said no - breast feeding said

'are you sure?'

Well I was the last time I looked and saw a small child attached to my breast

[LissyGlitter]

I can't remember who asked, but you get a certificate entitling you to free prescriptions, dental treatment, eye tests, glasses (but only up to a certain price) and some other stuff if you earn less than something like £15,000 a year as a household and claim either just child tax credits or both child and working tax credits. There are other circumstances as well, but i don't know them.

You are meant to get the certificate (it looks like a credit card) automatically, but mine hasn't arrived for this tax year (I keep meaning to chase it up but I'm pregnant so don't really need it at the moment, I should chase up DPs though) so could be worthwhile ringing someone if you think you should have it and haven't.

[IneedacleanerIamalazyslattern]

An optitian did the "are you sure?" thing to me when I said I wasn't on any benefits.
I said yes quite sure had a giggle about it later on though.
Was a small town everyone knew everyone and I didn't appear to have an obvious man around to some people because ex worked away so many people made the assumption I was a lone parent on benefits.

[KERALA1]

My friend went to the supermarket in a tracksuit and no make up. A lady gave her 50 pence. She is a city lawyer. Still cracks me up - she was so mortified she took the money and scuttled home.

[Kayran]

The most humilating bit of the trip was that they had a fantastic lamaze baby set in their reduced section and I bought it... so having flounced away I had to stand in the line to buy it.... I think sometimes the managers are actually worse than the sales assitants as they genuinely believe they have been given authority to 'rule'. I do understand that they should back their staff up but I really felt like a common criminal. Still I do love the face of confusion when the 'drenched rat' is able to retaliate with 'proper words and everything'! I am pretty sure if I wrote a letter I would get a standard 'we take all customer complaints seriously etc, however, credit card security is for your protection as much as ours etc.' This morning it was really important - tonight not so much...

[MorrisZapp]

Why are you so quick to leap to the most judgey conclusion?

Maybe she didn't want you to miss out on a free eye test, and wanted to know if there were any benefits at all you were on other than income support or whetever, maybe there are some benefits that entitle you to free eye tests that aren't immediately obvious?

I don't believe for one moment that somebody who works in an opticians actually thinks that people in jeans are all on benefits, sorry.

[ZZZenAgain]

What did you say Kayran when they told you that? And those were managers (heaven help us).

[ZZZenAgain]

they do not have to explain their security issues "with the likes of you" (!)
That's bad. "I'm sorry we are not permitted to discuss our policy for handling refunds with clients" is ok

"The likes of you" is dreadful though. Go on now, write a snotty letter about that please

[Kayran]

I went to tk maxx today with a reciept that had over £800 stuff on it to return some items - (husband has new job and had bought two suits and some shirts). We had also bought some clothes for our 3 girls and these were the items that did not fit. The refund came to just over £60.00. As I had just drowned on the school run and was in a wet tracksuit and bright pink gortex (be bright, be seen ) I knew I did not look my best but had the receipt and the items were within their (paltry) 14 day return period. Anyway she looked me up and down twice and then called a manager. 'Thought you would like to oversee this one'. Then a second manager a great big bloke was called. They all exchnaged meaningful glances and said 'we'll just check this out.' And then I lost my cool - in my best poshest (not great but usually works) voice using every ounce of lawyer skill that I abandoned 7 years ago I asked if they were worried I had spent too much! And then said some other things. They told me they did not have to explain their 'secuirty' issues with 'the likes of you'. So am busy working out if I can be bothered to write a letter of ocmplaint. Decided do not have time - however, have just written this so perhaps I do {blush} hate, Hate the way people judge books by covers - especially as my cover is so tatty

[6feetundertheGroundhogs]

I'd definately have a word with the optician if i were you OP.

and ZZZen, as for your friends Dr receptionist...

Outrageous!

[ZZZenAgain]

A friend of mine told me she had taken her dd to the doctor and the receptionist had trumpeted out (just so everybody could hear it : "You stink. I don't like your perfume"

I looked at her aghast, "she said whaaaaaaaaaaaaat?" . I can't believe the rudeness of people sometimes. What on the earth is the point in it? The thing is you are always so taken aback because you are really not expecting trouble, that it is hard to come up with a spontaneous response. I suppose they get some kind of little thrill out of it

[ZZZenAgain]

This must be a first surely

Do you realise you have posted on AIBU and no one has posted, yes, YABU or even YABVU. I think you should have a word with the optician. Some people might have turned on their heel and just left. It was the looking you up and down and then asking "are you sure?" which is really totally unacceptable IYAM

[diddl]

I didn´t realise there was a dress code for eye tests!

[flockwallpaper]

Thank you for your replies I wondered if I was being over sensitive. She looked in her 50s - admittedly she was dressed more smartly than me in a skirt and blouse, but all the same, not a great way to treat your customers. The optician was very professional and did a good job, so I may have a quiet word with him when I go to collect my glasses, since he would have lost my business had I walked out in disgust at his receptionist's attitude.

claricebeansmum, I think you might have a good point there. My situation sounds similar to yours.

Perhaps when my new glasses arrive, I will go and treat myself to some new clothes!

[crokky]

I think the people who look better dressed are those with an eye for clothes/fashion/that sort of stuff. Someone good with clothes dressed in supermarket clothes can look much better than someone in expensive clothes with no fashion sense.

I know nothing about clothes, so I only buy supermarket ones.

[ZZZenAgain]

not that it really matters, just feel like tearing her to shreds. She was just being a cow. I suppose if this was an inner-city place and it was a normal working day and you turned up not dressed in full office gear, she assumed you were unemployed. Not everyone goes to work in a suit though. I have yet to see an architect at work wearing a suit for instance (except on odd occasions for a meeting). Computer specialists like my brother all turn up in ratty old jeans and pullovers and look like perpetual students.

SAHM don't often walk about in high heels and pencil skirts with a blazer IME etc etc

[ZZZenAgain]

I have to know how the receptionist was dressed
and how old she was
and if she wore glasses - maybe she needs an eye test herself

[paisleyleaf]

what a cheek!
I hope you managed to slip in that you're a consultant.

[ChilloHippi]

In that case I don't want one. I ain't a pretty sight

[StealthPolarBear]

aha!
Maybe they give the free eye tests so you can see yourselfin the mirror more clearly

[StealthPolarBear]

the kind that means you lose all sense of style

[ChilloHippi]

Can I get a free eye test then? What benefits do you have to be on?