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AIBU?

To be slightly embarrassed because I know the lady who will give me a smear?

106 replies

Themasterandmargaritas · 22/09/2008 17:01

I am having a long overdue smear tomorrow. The GP who will do it is known to me, but I don't know her terribly well, as it is my dh who is very friendly with hers. To add insult to injury they are coming to dinner on Friday! Should I feel embarrassed or will she have seen it all before?

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AramintaAlice · 26/09/2008 15:39

Yes, I have lovely male docs too - just don't want them there. And I've had 7 children, nanny

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imananny · 26/09/2008 13:23

expat - life or death is different, but for smears (and I have them every 6mths) as i have had 3 lots of cancerous cells zapped and a cone biopsy - its nice not to have a strange man twice a year shove his fingers up me!!

My own doctor is male, and he is fab, have no problem getting pill from him and him asking questions, but I just like a bit of privacy in some things

though it might change after i have had children, apparen;ly ALL your dignity goes then, so my dear friends tell me

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rebelmum1 · 26/09/2008 12:37

my friend was invited to a dinner party where her local gp attended and she had an app the next day for a breast exam with him ... just grin and bear it ...

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AramintaAlice · 26/09/2008 12:30

And TMAM I laughed out loud at your comments on her rejection of you, lol

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AramintaAlice · 26/09/2008 12:27

Wasn't talking about life or death. I said 'life threatening situations excepted' in my post!

My point was that there is choice about male or female gynaes and while theres choice, I'll go for the woman as I don't trust the motives of any man who chooses to qualify himself to spend his entire working life delaing with vaginas. I find it very odd that any man would choose ths as his career path and I don't trust them.

Imananny, glad to see that I'm not alone

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Themasterandmargaritas · 26/09/2008 11:36

Perhaps I should rephrase that, I have been to see a few male gynaes. Don't want you all thinking I am slapper

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Themasterandmargaritas · 26/09/2008 11:36

Now she has cancelled dinner with us too Not only does she not want to see my fanjo, she doesn't want to eat my food either.

Kiddiz, the MIL doing my smear is just not something I could ever contemplate. But AA I have no problem with a male gynae, I have had a few in the past.

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expatinscotland · 26/09/2008 11:33

so you'd rather die than have a male doctor looking at your bits?

my dad had prostate cancer. cancer.

he had a female oncourologist.

he just couldn't be bothered waiting round for a male one because the clock was ticking on his life.

he wanted the one most qualified to get rid of that tumour and do his/her best to preserve his urinary and sexual continence as well.

if i'm dying or in pain or getting screened for something that save my life so i can be around for my kids, i fail to see what role gender plays in that.

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pigleto · 26/09/2008 11:29

I know my midwife quite well. She has seen me poo . I am sure she would never bring it up socially though.

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imananny · 26/09/2008 11:26

AramintaAlice - agree - wouldnt want a male doctor giving me smear

anymore than hubby would want female doctor looking at his bits if he needed it

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AphroditeInHerNightie · 26/09/2008 10:21

I used to meet the doctor who fitted my coil on a daily basis in the school playground.
I'd finally got used to that when I went to a school mum's christmas dinner, and guess who was sat on the same table right opposite me?
A few wines later and I couldn't give a stuff!

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AramintaAlice · 26/09/2008 09:58

I read the whole thread from start to finish and was cringing for you - so glad about how it worked out.

The alternative was far worse than your friend though - am I the only person in the world who has always felt deeply suspicious of any man who picks gynaecology to specialise in?

There, I've said it! Politically incorrect to voice that view but I'd never go anywhere a near a male gynae, for precisely that reason - life threatening situations excepted. I always ask for a female doctor and any male midwife who ever tried to come near me was told in no uncertain terms where to go .

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kiddiz · 26/09/2008 09:07

Before we got married I moved in with my DH and his family while we looked for a house. My MIL registered me with the gp practice where she worked as a nurse. I arrive to have a smear to find that I had been booked in with my MIL !! Really awkward situation. I didn't really know her that well at the time and certainly didn't want her doing my smear but also didn't want to offend her by asking for someone else.

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nowwearefour · 25/09/2008 19:37

my mw friend did a sweep for me almost every day ahead of dd2s arrival and was the one to ell me i was in labour and the first to feel dd2s head! i wasnt embarrassed at all. totally normal to her. i was just grateful someone would do it for me!

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Wade · 25/09/2008 19:34

I took my pop socks off!! It would have just looked too stupid!

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debzmb62 · 25/09/2008 18:25

we lived in married quaters and my next door neighbour was an assistant when i had my baby so he seen all my bits and wobbly bits omg worse still he lived in the flat below and his wife and me were good friends and i often heard him talking about people on the operating table things like gosh i did,nt realizse she was that big etc luckalie not me he was talking about someone else well i hope it was !!

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noonki · 25/09/2008 18:08

When I was a teenager I met my boyfriend's mum in the waiting room of the Family Planning CLinic - we pretended not to know each other !

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philpot · 25/09/2008 18:02

Urgh. I once had one from a nurse, who:
a. Was listening to the radio as I came in, a homosexual was mentioned. Immediately launched into a diatribe about gay men, saying all men like their bum touched, that does not make them gay, gay is wrong.
b. Bade me undress in the corner. There was no screen. She watched with a sneer on her face.
c. When I got on the couch she 'pah!'d at my feet and told me to remove my socks because she didn't like looking down and seeing socks. Honestly. The earlier stuff about sock etiquette does seem to matter to some health professionals...
d. By this time I was flustered. By way of conversation I asked if this was the new smear test that included a chlamydia test (leaflets on them in the waiting room). She glared at me and said 'do you have an std? You would know!'.

Oh, and she rubbed the slide with her thumb, as if CLEANING it, before testing me. The results were inconclusive. Should have reported her and never did. Still riles me. If I ever feel uncomfortable in any clinical situation again I will leave, I don't care how embarrassed I feel, a lot of us end up in horrible situations because we feel it would be rude to back out.

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theicepopqueen · 25/09/2008 16:56

I once had a smear performed by my newish GP whop suggested that I lie on my side as it would be more comfortable as I have a retroverted uterus - and it was. However, no sooner had a I felt the cold metal of the speculum on my skin he started a coversation about one of his consultant friends I had recently started working with, who had made a pass at me that day. A "beam me up Scotty" moment if ever there was one!

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expatinscotland · 23/09/2008 21:53

good on you for going, master!

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imananny · 23/09/2008 21:47

oops

know its important, but didnt mean to repeat

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imananny · 23/09/2008 21:46

least you can get know her better on friday over drinks/meal rather than between your legs

well done for going, shame about the non sparkly flannel,and anyone else on here who needs one PLEASE book now

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imananny · 23/09/2008 21:46

least you can get know her better on friday over drinks/meal rather than between your legs

well done for going, shame about the non sparkly flannel,and anyone else on here who needs one PLEASE book now

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imananny · 23/09/2008 21:45

least you can get know her better on friday over drinks/meal rather than between your legs

well done for going, shame about the non sparkly flannel,and anyone else on here who needs one PLEASE book now

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onebatmother · 23/09/2008 13:20

Oh good.
Yes, blimey, must book one myself.

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