To avoid seeing old friends and family members because I've ballooned?

[ColumboWearsControlPants]

Title says it all really. Used to be thin. Now I am fat. I've made excuses for not seeing old school friends and even for not making it to a family reunion (long lost relative from childhood), but when I think about it, the ONLY reason why I didn't go is because I don't want them to see how I've put on 3 stone.

[Starbear]

KT1982 Are you going to jump over to the next thread that Columbo has started and keep us motivated???

[Starbear]

Columbo you've got me when should we start?
KT1982 Yes Please. You wouldn't believe it but I used to give Jane Fonda a run for her money. Please, Please be our sponsor.
Everyone else I think we have the beginning of a beautiful friendship lets go for it!

[ColumboWearsControlPants]

I've started a thread over in the weight loss club big slim/whatever section called

Boot Camp - Slim again in 6 months - No excuses!

Please come and join me ladies. Let's encourage and support each other and do something about it.

[KT1983]

Hi ladies, I am a pregnant Fitness Instructor!! I just stumbled accross this thread...
I joined up on mumsnet to make friends etc, as I live in London with my partner, all my friends and family live up North.

Well, all I was going to say is, if you need any help with exercises or Fitness advice, il be happy to help.

[Litchick]

I totally empathise.
I am the fattest I've ever been - which although not gross is still too big for me.
That said, I met a friend who I hadn't seen for 18 months and the first thing she said to me was 'you look so young.'
Was expecting the usual 'you look well.'

[pamelat]

I agree with Janos. True friends will be supportive.

I would probably say beforehand that I had put weight on (to avoid shocked faces).

I met an old school friend after Uni days and she had put about 4 stone on but she laughed on meeting me and made light of it.

3 years on, she has lost all of the weight anyway.

Not that it should matter, but it clearly does to you

I am 8 lbs heavier and a bit down about going out. People have different expectations of themselves. I hate myself for not fitting in to my clothes (8 months on) butI say this sat on the sofa, drinking tea with a chocolate biscuit!

[Janos]

I really do sympathise but please don't cut yourself off from friends because you've put on some weight - that's a way of punishing yourself and you haven't done anything wrong!

Your friends will want to see you. Who knows, they may be able to offer some support and encouragement for losing weight?

[TheConfusedOne]

I hate it have doubled in size since having to take steroids, and saw a friend I hadn't seen in about 5 years, his face said it all.

Hate looking in the mirror.

[pickupthismess]

OK ladies - today you have made me decide to do something.

I have put on 4 stone over two pregnancys and am SO fed up with myself. I can't fit into anything any more. I have been avoiding going to see a friend (who lives far away) for over a year just because I keep thinking I'll get it off. I've started a couple of diets but am absolutely crap.

Columbo, I'm so with you. I have almost no photos of me with the kids - and I'm really sorry.

[OrmIrian]

I sympathise. But the reunion is quite a good target. Low-carbing is a good way to lose weight - I'ev found it worked really well. Can you also try some running? Or join a gym.

[Niecie]

I am glad I am not alone. I am the same.

I have put on 4 stone since DS2 was born and I am avoiding some people.

We were invited to a BBQ last Sunday and put it off because DS2 was starting school on Monday and I didn't want him to have a big day out the day before.

In the back of my mind though, was the feeling that I can't let them see me like this.

And no, they haven't all put on weight. Most of them have lost unless they have had a baby in the last year but then they have an excuse and still don't look as big as me. I have no excuse.

I have big plans that now both DSs are at school that I can get some exercise and lose the weight but I haven't found the motivation yet. You'd think looking in the mirror would be enough, wouldn't you?

[kiddiz]

I lost over 3 stone after dd was born going to ww. DD is now 11 and sadly over the last couple of years the weight has slowly crept back on. I used to belong to a gym but had to cancel my membership after dh was diagnosed with cancer. That plus the stress of DH's illness plus reaching 40 means the weight I lost is nearly all back again.
I completely sympathise with you as I do the same thing.
I can't go back to ww as DH is about to be made redundant so I can't afford the weekly fee anymore. I really must do something though as the weight is making me miserable. I'm supposed to go to a work mate's birthday do on Saturday but don't want to go just because I have nothing to wear I feel ok in.

[BEAUTlFUL]

I bet you don't look that bad, honestly. After DS1, I felt massive but I see photos of me then a blurred, panic-stricken woman streaking out of shot, hand stretched towards camera and I actually looked lovely! The bits you could see, anyway.

Three stone isn't that much. It's enough to transform you when you lose it, but when you gain it, it's not enough to turn you from a size 10 into one of those amorphous, American-style Fat People.

[AwakeStill]

And me - I'm doing this now with baby weight and have done it before. I said to myself before that you get one shot at it, and have to change right away because of it, otherwise you'll cancel everything forever and that's just too sad. Also - get your lovely self in some photos, pronto. Its DS' record (and also you'll be able to look back on them in a few months time and think, look how far I've come, and look at all the Christmas invitations I'm loving saying yes to!!)

[BEAUTlFUL]

If that's OK with you two, of course? Crap, I'm fat and bossy.

[BEAUTlFUL]

I'll do this too. I'm 3 stone heavier than I should be, and am avoiding EVERYONE. I'm so in.

[Starbear]

Goodnight

[Starbear]

Haven't gone yet. How about do execise and diet like those fly threads. Get in touch the night before Plan the next day then see how we did?

[ColumboWearsControlPants]

Yes, Starbear - I do think we should do something. I'll speak to you tomorrow.

[ColumboWearsControlPants]

Also the sad thing is there are hardly any photos of me with DS because I'm always screeching "Don't get me in the photo" and trying to haul my carcass out of view. It's pathetic, it really is.

[Starbear]

I've got a thing about the right time to exercise and its never now. Drink tea and eat biscuits like other people have a fag.
DS is great he loves to exercise. DH is a PE teacher and is so lovely he never says a word. I also show my love by cooking!! Do you really fancy an online bootcamp? Shall we have a go?!! Must go to bed now as I get up at 6am for work. But think about it and get back to me.

[Helga80]

Not unreasonable no, but do you want to lose contact with everyone on the basis of your weight.

It's a very easy trap to fall into (one I did a couple of years back).

As harsh as it sounds you've got to accept your size/shape and get one with it or do something about it or life could get very lonely. Easier said then done and I can't really claim to be following my own advice!

[ColumboWearsControlPants]

Starbear - the thing is I've kept putting people off, thinking I can change for next time but I haven't done it. Also same as you - was size 10, now size 16. We should do a virtual bootcamp or something. It's the psychology of it that is hard for me - at some level I haven't tackled the issues that made me slide into weight gain.