To send this missive to Sainsburys...

[DonutMum]

The content of the note says it all. He gulped so mych air in his screaming that he STILL has wind.

"I am writing to complain about a ludicrous situation I found myself in at your Stanway Colchester store today. I asked the restaurant to fill a container with hot water so my baby's bottle could be heated. My baby, who is 5 weeks old, was screaming. I was told that they could not give me water due to health and safety law (!) and they would heat the bottle for me. Are you seriously expecting customers with children who find themselves in this position to be willing to allow a spotty nineteen year old boy to judge when a baby's milk is warm enough? In the event, the milk was overheated and my son continued to scream for a further ten minutes causing great distress to me and to him. This is totally unacceptable and I suggest you review your policy to allow mothers to have hot water and therefore judge for themselves when milk has been adequately heated. After all, I could have asked for a pot of tea with the tea bag on the side and used that hot water to heat the bottle. I also find it incredulous that health and safety "law" is given as the reason - it is quite clearly policy. Unless, you can point out where on the statute books this particular law is - "thou shalt not allow people to have jugs of hot water in case, in their infinite cretindom, they burn themselves."

Thank you for your consideration."

[spicemonster]

I agree that it's an utterly ridiculous policy but I doubt a letter will make them change their minds. I used to get a pot of tea and a pot of hot water on the side and use that to heat the bottle/jar of food. They'll let you have hot water if you don't tell them what you need it for.

I think you've been given a very hard time on this thread.

[mrsruffallo]

If someone had knocked the water over and burned you or your baby it would have been much more distressing than him having to wait an extra 10 minutes.
I agree' infinite cretindom' and 'spotty nineteeen yr old' sound silly

[spicemonster]

I don't see why anyone is more likely to knock over hot water for heating a bottle than they are to knock over a teapot full of hot tea.

[emmalou23]

The reason's pretty obvious isn't it?

[TheSmallClanger]

That letter will not be taken seriously. If you still want to complain, rewrite it in a more objective way and make it clearer what you want the outcome of your complaint to be. For instance, do you want them to change your policy or are you just trying to get that particular member of staff disciplined? Complaint letters should always have a point and a clear desired outcome.
I also don't like the insults directed at young shop staff. People complain that school/college leavers are lazy and won't take jobs, then look down on them when they do - what are they meant to do?

[Turniphead1]

Mrs Ruffallo I don't think the OP's feeding choice is relevant.

[AbbaFan]

The letter won't change anything anyway. These supermarkets are way more worried about a customer getting burned by hot water than a customer getting fed up!

Just leave it, and take you own water in a flask next time.

[mustrunmore]

With no disrespect, this is def a first -baby reaction; I remember being there myself Along with why there were no toilets big enough to get the buggy in, why there were so many stairs everywhere, why not enough cafes had highchairs etc etc...

[DonutMum]

Just to be clear, I was not and never would be rude to the staff member - the policy is not his fault. In fact, I actually told him this. Also, I was once a spotty nineteen year old working in a shop. Hence all of the annoyance and therefore exaggeration came out in the complaint to head office - and this was after I cooled down a bit. I don't really care if they laugh at it - I felt better after writing it.

I am very aware that it is my responsibility to ensure that I am as prepared as possible for every eventuality and pretty much always am hence having got to baby number three before coming across such a stupid situation but sometimes circumstances just conspire against you.

Of course, I was cross because my precious baby was upset - i also had two under fives with me -the point of the post was not to complain that I couldn't get a bottle of milk hot but that the policy is totally ludicrous and does not have a logical argument to support it. It's also very sad that young (and not so young) mums have such a struggle out there as it is without being frustrated/criticised unnecessarily. And while the health and safety police are making babies of us all, life just gets more difficult for everyone - not being allowed to help other people in case you get sued. Sad sad sad.

Oh, and I do breastfeed most of the time Mrs Ruffalo, just not prepared to get my norks out in Sainsburys - personal preference. In fact that was probably why i was so cross - having shooting let down pains while baby is screaming not good.

And thank you smallwhitecat.

[WideWebWitch]

I remember when I had PFB and we had one of those bottle warmer things like this and you had to wait about 10 minutes for it to heat up but ds would be SCREAMING the house down. But we wouldn't use the microwave because all the books said you shouldn't.

Also, I've told this before but just to make you laugh we also had ONE stair in between our hall and kitchen. And a stairgate. pmsl at that now I look back.

[Bumdiddley]

We religiously warmed pfb's bottles. Psb got room temperature!

I totally understand the letter. That could have been me. (fellow Colchester girl)

[mumeeee]

YABU. That is standard practice in Cafes now. Also most teenagers are perfectly capable of heating up nottles.

[Turniphead1]

Now I am confused. You are mixed feeding (or at the very least giving bottles of expressed milk) and you chose to let your child scream rather than bf him in a cafe? Now I understand your preference of not wanting under usual circs to bf in public - but if your baby was as distressed as you say why didn't you just give him a quick feed with your back to the main cafe, for at least the time it took to cool the bottle down?

Seems really odd to me.

(and that's not a comment relating to pro-b'fing - more a matter of common sense)

[Bumdiddley]

There isn't really a back in that cafe Turniphead1. IIRC.

[Turniphead1]

Still think that's odd. To be as cross as she was about not getting her bottle heated to the correct temp and to have another means to feed the baby...Just me I guess.

[Bumdiddley]

When pfb was 5 weeks old I was absolutely drunk with fatigue.

I don't think op is bu, she probably just felt too vulnerable to bf in a caff in Sainsbury's on her own.

[Turniphead1]

She's a third time Mum though. If that makes a difference. I do understand though she had two under 5s with her also.

[Bumdiddley]

D'oh. See that's what happens when you don't read all the posts.

Hmmm. See now I think YABU.

[Turniphead1]

Yeah the PFB comments are misleading. For my money I would have said PFB too - but no, Precious Third Born

[StripeyKnickersSpottySocks]

How about just a letter asking them if they'd consider having bottle warmers available?

[ruddynorah]

you haven't atually sent that letter have you? it's dreadful and makes you sound totally irrational, they won't want to help you if you come across like that.

be more prepared next time, get the baby used t room temp milk..or better still get used to bf in public. much easier.

[Habbibu]

You might be better served by a polite query asking why it's not ok to get a jug of water, but it is ok to get an open cup of hot black tea or coffee? I'd really like to hear their answer to that.

[VeniVidiVickiQV]

I'd not send the letter TBH. If you'd have been prepared then this wouldnt have arisen. I think it's reasonable for them not to dispense bowls/pots/cups of hot water for a purpose other than to imbibe. There are some clumsy fuckwits out there you see .

Your powercut is not their problem. Your lack of wanting to get your norks out isnt their problem either really. You could have covered yourself up with a shawl or a blanket if you feel conscious.

I think Sainsburys policies are spot on really.

[VeniVidiVickiQV]

Our local sainsburys has two bottle/food jar warmers in it's cafe. Like I said - their policies seem spot on to me