... to be baffled why so many people stand up on public transport?

[ImJustMadAboutSaffron]

When there are several seats available? It's mainly younger people and teenagers. I'm hardly old myself only 42 but I think it's weird.

Nothing to do with covid, been happening for years.

Is it uncool to sit down?

[RascafríaMom]

@ALongHardWinter

To all the people saying that they stand because it frees up a seat for someone less able to,I wish there were more people like you around on the buses and tubes where I live! I am disabled with osteo and rheumatoid arthritis,use a walking stick,and use buses quite frequently,tubes less so. I really struggle to stand on a moving vehicle and get thrown about,hurting my already painful shoulders and knees. I've lost count of the times I've got on a bus or tube train and been unable to find a seat. I rarely get offered one,even by the people sitting in the 'priority seats',who usually just pretend they haven't seen me. 😡

I am in Spain, and I can't imagine. :(

I was on the metro two weeks ago and there were a white mother, father and an infant in a stroller. There were also a black mother and her three year old kid. They were by the dedicated preferred seating. When a pair of young, white French male tourists didn't give up their seats as is customary, three different people ripped into them for that.

When i was pregnant, I often had to turn down multiple seat offers. It just feels culturally ingrained. People offer for pregnant women, people with small children, those with visible disabilities and the elderly. It is pretty simple to do.

(Now elevator etiquette when there are escalators right next to them, and allowing strollers, wheelchairs, people with luggage and people with mobility issues onto them first? That they suck at and I could scream over.)

[limitedperiodonly]

Wow! I've just had a thought. What if she'd sat on a real pig? One of those teeny teacup ones I was taking home as a child's pet and killed it with the downward force of her righteous arse. I think she'd have felt even more foolish. That's why it always pays to check before sitting.

[limitedperiodonly]

@EnalaGoya Gosh! You make a lot of bets about people, don't you? I suppose some people might call me a cunt or a stealth space thug wanker but not a psycho unless medically qualified - are you? In any case I don't think that's a word doctors use these days.

It wasn't a trick, I was reading. People do on train journeys. it wasn't terribly interesting, it was the Evening Standard but I was lost in my own world and not scanning the carriage like a meerkat on the lookout for hungry lions. That is still acceptable in my book or free newspaper.

I didn't notice her and don't see why I should have. There were many other seats in the carriage so I didn't think someone would be desperate to sit beside me but would prefer to spread out. I expect she was one of those people keen to make a point and thought a respectable looking woman would be a better bet to make it on than an aggressive drunk or muttering unwashed person or even a manspreader airing his balls. I bet you weigh those things up before choosing where to sit, don't you?


She could have said: "Move your bag". She could have added please to be polite but that would not have been necessary. But she decided to sit on it heedless or perhaps excited that she might squash something inside. Perhaps something precious to me like my child's birthday cake or just a loaf of bread . But she sat on the stone pig. It wasn't an offensive weapon, which is something only psychos carry but a perfectly ordinary, though robust purchase I'd just been to the garden centre to pick it up and put on the seat next to me because it was empty and I thought I might forget it. Between you and me, I'll never forget that pig now. Every time I look at it I smile.

FYI I don't carry my handbags crossed over my body and only use a rucksack when going the gym and I walk there. I can't remember the brand. Should I? But such things do not inspire feelings of distaste or anger in me. Why do they arouse strong feelings in you?

BTW I do most things overtly unless it's having a wee or a shit (never on the seats of public transport though).

PS thanks for proving me right. I didn't think one of you would be along so quickly though. Don't you have a train to catch?

[limitedperiodonly]

@Tupster you've said it all for me. I am sure though that someone will be along soon to froth: "Let you sit! It's my right to sit not yours to let me! Has your handbag paid for a seat? If I see a bag on a seat I just sit on it!"

Indeed, these people do. Like the woman who plonked her arse on my carrier bag. If she'd have asked I'd have ,moved it and said: "Sorry! I didn't see you there.".

It didn't squash as she hoped because it contained a stone garden ornament of a pig. She balanced on it unsteadily for a stop saying nothing until I said: "Would you be more comfortable if I moved my bag?"

I bet she had the twin bruises of the pig's ears on her bum for a week.

[Tupster]

@happyinherts

Everyone was sitting in the aisle seats today - handbags on window seats. Tried to ask but was met with glares and unpleasantness. Had to stand whether I wished to or not.

I always sit in the aisle seat on the train because I like to sit in the aisle seat. Will throw my bag on the seat next to me if I'm in a pair because it's easier. I am not trying to reserve a double for myself, just sitting where I like best. If someone asks to sit, I will say "of course" leap up and let them in to the window. Sometimes when I know it's busy I will look up as people get on or even offer the seat, but often I'm reading a book or a paper or something and not really paying attention so I'm not actively offering, but I can still hear if someone asks and will still let them in with no trouble. Just ask properly, using your voice and words, not some sort of raised eye and grunting code and people will let you sit.

[ALongHardWinter]

To all the people saying that they stand because it frees up a seat for someone less able to,I wish there were more people like you around on the buses and tubes where I live! I am disabled with osteo and rheumatoid arthritis,use a walking stick,and use buses quite frequently,tubes less so. I really struggle to stand on a moving vehicle and get thrown about,hurting my already painful shoulders and knees. I've lost count of the times I've got on a bus or tube train and been unable to find a seat. I rarely get offered one,even by the people sitting in the 'priority seats',who usually just pretend they haven't seen me. 😡

[Devoutspoken]

Happyinherts, so no-one actually refused as in said no?

[IncyWincyGrownUp]

Sometimes I need to use crutches, if I’m only making a short journey I won’t sit, as it’s far more painful than just remaining upright and wedged into a corner.

[limitedperiodonly]

You wouldn't do it if someone was smelly or appeared antisocial and/or violent so why choose to sit next to someone if other seats are available?

[girlfriend44]

On the bus earlier and thought of this thread.

A man was in the way with shipping bags when he could have sat down.

Woman trying to get off the bus, said to him as she touched him with her pram.

I wish she'd said why don't you sit down.

[limitedperiodonly]

I wonder why people desperately want to sit next to me on the train if other seats are available.

[OpheIia]

happyinherts
Everyone was sitting in the aisle seats today - handbags on window seats. Tried to ask but was met with glares and unpleasantness. Had to stand whether I wished to or not.

Tried to ask"? What's wrong with "excuse me, I would like to sit there."

I've asked before if someone would mind moving their bag, I never considered the possibility of them objecting but I shouldn't be surprised really. I can't believe people would be so rude and selfish as to take up a seat with a bag while people are standing.

[BaileySharp]

I find people standing when there are seats a bit annoying because they are usually in the way. It's much better to sit and just be willing to give up your seat if it gets full?

[Jules912]

I find it easier to stand if I'm only going a stop or two. I also have a dodgy knee which means I can't manage the steps on a moving bus, so never go upstairs

[ChardonnaysBeastlyCat]

@happyinherts

Everyone refused. Adverted gaze or gave daggers, rolled eyes, tutted. So upsetting really, it's easier to stand.

Sorry to hear that.

[LittleSisterLeavingTown]

@happyinherts

Everyone was sitting in the aisle seats today - handbags on window seats. Tried to ask but was met with glares and unpleasantness. Had to stand whether I wished to or not.

"Tried to ask"? What's wrong with "excuse me, I would like to sit there."

[LittleSisterLeavingTown]

1. They're only going a few stops and want to be close to the door.
2. Seats are manky.
3. Too cool.

[happyinherts]

Everyone refused. Adverted gaze or gave daggers, rolled eyes, tutted. So upsetting really, it's easier to stand.

[ChardonnaysBeastlyCat]

@happyinherts

Everyone was sitting in the aisle seats today - handbags on window seats. Tried to ask but was met with glares and unpleasantness. Had to stand whether I wished to or not.

What do you mean you tried? You ask, firmly but politely. Channel the teacher you lied the least in school.
They might not like it, but no one has so far refused to move a handbag, at least in my experience.

[happyinherts]

Everyone was sitting in the aisle seats today - handbags on window seats. Tried to ask but was met with glares and unpleasantness. Had to stand whether I wished to or not.

[OP83]

I often stand (if I'm not going far).

I sit down all day at work as it's nice to stretch my legs.

PLUS (and possibly more importantly) it prevents one of the following:

• Someone coming on, there only being a couple of seats left, and having to decide if you're more/less worth of a seat than them (or, as is the modern phenomenon, them getting offended if you offer them your seat).
• Someone sitting on the outside of you meaning you now have to ask them to move (often fairly shortly) when you want to get off.

[feelthebeatfromthetangerine]

Or, possibly, they've had a bad experience with the seats.

Sat down the other day as I was exhausted and unwell - realised the seat was wet and moved. Unpleasant.

Someone else got on after me, and I couldn't stop them in time. Also made the same mistake.

Given the nasty patterns on the seat, it's hard to tell the difference between a dodgy wet patch and the lighting.

I'm willing to bet that the seat didn't get cleaned when the bus returned to the depot. Probably just dried overnight. :(

[Phrenologistsfinger]

I always sat down (during my 30s) but I have chronic fatigue syndrome and hypothyroidism so need to conserve all my energy to get through the day. (It’s much improved now although still there if I don’t manage it.)

Don‘t judge all younger people who sit down, they might just really need to. Long covid etc probably adding to that issue.

[Tupster]

I stand on the Tube when I'm going to/from work because I have a big old rucksack on my back with my laptop, headset, cables, lunch.. all that crap in, and it's bulky and I really can't be bothered to be shrugging it on and off, so I just keep it on and stand up.