To ask if teachers get offended by extra tutoring

[Upthebracket22]

My 14 year old DS is struggling a bit at secondary in English so we got him a tutor to get a bit of extra help on the premise that a bit of extra 1-1 support might give him a boost both in terms of skills and confidence.

I mentioned this at the parents eve to the teacher & they made it clear they were offended. I’d kind of asked about what we should focus on in the 1-1s- DS is a bit borderline grades wise & definitely needs a bit of help.

Genuinely didn’t mean to offend the teacher- in a big class, the kids just don’t get the 1-1 support they need & I really want DS to pass GSCE with a C grade.

is it a massive faux pas?

[Iwanttoliveonamountain]

because tutors [sometimes/often] have no idea of actual syllabus/ curriculum, haven't worked in a school, do not understand the grade system because they've never been part of moderation. And therefore can confuse.

[noblegiraffe]

Nope, it’s fine, loads of kids have maths tutors, and I would say the more help they get the better.

Except, as mentioned above, the kids who then sit in lessons doing fuck-all and when challenged say ‘I’ll just do it with my tutor’.

I usually ask them how impressed their parents would be to find out they were forking out for a tutor when their child couldn’t be arsed to engage with the free classroom teaching.

[Pottedpalm]

As a (maths) teacher I was usually happy for pupils to have a tutor; it would boost my results and with the best will in the world you just cannot give much individual attention in class. Even with classes of 25 ( private school) that’s 2 minutes per pupil in a50 minute lesson, even if no time was spent on giving instructions etc.
I now tutor and almost all my tutees come from referral by my colleagues. I know them and how they teach, they keep me up to date with books etc and parents are happy for there to be a dialogue, so I can be effective.

[BetsyBigNose]

We had a catch up with my DDs Yr 11 Tutor this week and he was telling us he does some private tutoring himself!

[Mamansparkles]

Honestly it depends on the tutor, the parents and the pupil. There are some pupils who need more 1:1 support than I can give and I am delighted if their parents say they are getting a tutor or sending them on an intensive Easter revision course with a tutor.
If the parents are completely unrealistic and pay a tutor who is a university student who doesn't actually understand the demands of the syllabus and try to use that to argue with me about their child's ability level, that's pretty annoying and does the pupil no favours. Likewise if the pupil gets them to help with homework because that masks their ability for me to an extent.
A good tutor who understands the subject and the syllabus, for an under confident pupil or pupil with mild SEN who needs more support than school can give is brilliant.
I would always say ask the teacher first, they might be able to recommend someone they know who is good.

[MardyBumm]

I'm a teacher and usually are supportive of children being tutored. I would not be offended as all I want is the best for children. The only exception is when the tutor is someone inexperienced and has never worked in education and undermines the teacher's teaching. One child I taught had a tutor who kept telling my student I was teaching certain maths concepts wrong because they had no idea of the national curriculum and how maths is broken down and taught in primary. The child picked up many bad habits. I've also had tutors ask me to provide work for them to complete with the child...if you're charging the parents to tutor than you should be actually resourcing your sessions yourself.

[Happylittlethoughts]

They usually are the Tutors 🤣🤣🤣

[TheOnlyLivingBoyInNewCross]

@Iwanttoliveonamountain

because tutors [sometimes/often] have no idea of actual syllabus/ curriculum, haven't worked in a school, do not understand the grade system because they've never been part of moderation. And therefore can confuse.

This is the big problem with tutors. One of my students at A Level once had a tutor who didn’t understand the assessment objectives of the course we were following at all and thus was giving really poor advice. The parents wouldn’t be told though.

[MrsR87]

Not at all! There is only so much time you can devote to a pupil when the vast majority of your classes have 36 pupils in them. I run lots of after school sessions and breakfast clubs too but again the sheer number of pupils make it impossible to ensure all pupils get the support they need/deserve.

I would rather work in collaboration with parents over things like this as I can suggest the areas the pupil needs to work on. I can also point the tutor in the right direction of up to date assessment criteria for the correct exam boards etc as they don’t always know.

[Countdown2023]

Crack on and get a tutor - but get one who really understands the syllabus and the assessment criteria. Loads of people say they can tutor but if fact struggle to put stuff in the context. So get someone who is currently teaching specification or has only just retired etc

And the tutor needs to act in support of the school teacher and not against. I had an awful time convincing a student that the way I taught him to answer questions was the right way and not his parents friend

[Everydayimhuffling]

That's ridiculous! I would love to be able to give my students more focused attention than class sizes allow; why on earth would anyone mind them getting that? I don't teach maths, though, so don't tend to have the issue of them learning the wrong method, to be fair.

[pilates]

The best thing we ever did for my DD. She excelled beyond our expectations and her good English skills have helped immensely with college and then university. I’m not sure if it upset her teacher - never gave it much thought.

[thegreenlight]

The problem is that parents value the tutors because they pay for them, no matter if they are less than rigorous or are outdated. As a maths specialist I can confirm it is indeed very annoying when a parent insists that their child is achieving xyz because they sit next to a 16 year old in Sainsbury’s once a week and complete multiple choice quizzes on a computer. Proper quality tutors, on the other hand, are great and can make a real difference when there isn’t much time at school to support children that are above the bottom 20%.

[MrsHamlet]

I'm not offended but I'd like to be involved. I'm happy to suggest areas I'd like the tutor to work on and to ask them not to do certain things yet.

[tweetypi]

I'm a maths teacher and definitely wouldn't be offended. When I was starting out I also used to tutor so can see the benefits of it. It annoys me when tutors use the past papers I want to use in class though so prefer parents to be upfront and open up a dialogue with the tutor. We all want the best outcome for the child and working together is the best way to get it IMO.

[Murdoch1949]

It’s just that teacher! I’d welcome kids getting extra support, it means they’re doing more subject centred tasks. Also they may get a higher grade, kudos to teacher, yay.

[echt]

Until this thread, I'd never heard of a teacher getting the hump about a student of theirs having tutor. I was always happy if students were seeking extra help.

What is annoying is if the tutor asks for a crapload of info about the student when they should be setting work to determine it themselves, e.g. please send me a list of areas X needs to work on. Er......set and mark your own work.

I've found it best for the school to keep a polite hands-off distance with a tutor as the school cannot guarantee the tutor's qualifications, etc. and does not have a relationship with them. The student/parent has access to reports and assessments without involving the teacher.

I've been in both positions.

[georgarina]

Judging by the amount of work I'm expected to do with my kids every night at home, I would say no, it's not offensive or a faux pas.

[WillPowerLite]

Nope. It's one to one coaching that you cannot get in class.

[nightbulb]

@Sinthie

Not at all - it’s nice to see parents and students taking the initiative rather than expecting teachers to do unpaid “boosters”, “interventions” and “support sessions” on their evenings and lunch breaks.

As a former teacher I think this is an appalling attitude.

I see no issue with tutoring at all, when done well and as a partnership with common goals. However, it should not become the norm simply to compensate for children not getting what they need from the school, not least because it widens inequality between those who can afford and those who can’t - the very gaps that schools are aiming to close.

[mids2019]

I think there may be teachers that have thoughts on inequality and advantage for pupils brought on by money. Tutors are not cheap and many families will find tutoring unaffordable. Possibly some teachers believe in an equal education independent of family income?

[mids2019]

@nightbulb

Exactly. I think a lot of teachers would have an issue of working in partnership with tutors as tutoring is effectively private education. It must be frustrating for parents that can't afford tutors to see teachers advocating tiutor use and implying it is an important complement for school education.

[autienotnaughty]

@alloalloallo

My daughter’s maths teacher at college is really offended by us finding a tutor.

My daughter has some disabilities as well as dyslexia and Dyscalculia and really struggles with processing and working memory.

She has failed her maths GCSE twice now (once at school and once at college) so we have a tutor once a week who consolidates everything that DD has done in her maths lessons that week.

The maths teacher at college was annoyed, and point blank refuses to let DD bring home any worksheets, her maths book or anything she’s done in class so the tutor can go over what she’s done.

That's awful. I would complain , the teacher is deliberately hindering the child.

[Seashor]

I’m never offended. There is nothing like one to one intervention, it really brings children on. All the teachers I work with are hugely supportive if parents suggest it.

[OperaStation]

@alloalloallo

My daughter’s maths teacher at college is really offended by us finding a tutor.

My daughter has some disabilities as well as dyslexia and Dyscalculia and really struggles with processing and working memory.

She has failed her maths GCSE twice now (once at school and once at college) so we have a tutor once a week who consolidates everything that DD has done in her maths lessons that week.

The maths teacher at college was annoyed, and point blank refuses to let DD bring home any worksheets, her maths book or anything she’s done in class so the tutor can go over what she’s done.

Are you serious? That’s really awful. Have you spoken to the head and insisted that your daughter be allowed to bring those things home? I absolutely wouldn’t stand for that.