Dad in women's loo .

[HappyDays40]

I have been to the loo in Mc Donald's and was mid flow when a dad walks in with his daughters aged about 4 and 6.He stands waiting while his daughters are using the toilet. I came out and said you are not supposed to be in here.
He said he had to take his daughters to the loo and I told him that he needed to either wait outside or take them the mens. He said they don't need to see that and I told him that he shouldn't be hanging round in women's toilets for any reason. His sense of entitlement gave me the rage so I told a member of staff. I can only imagine how triggering that could be for some women. Intrusive fucker.

[ChocolateHippo]

@Thepossibility

And I'd be mad if my DH took my DD into the men's, she doesn't need to see dicks.

Another one with an entitled husband then who is teaching your daughter than men don't have to respect female-only spaces.

[RufustheFloralmissingreindeer]

Yanbu in the slightest

just been talking to ds 1 about this

men shouldn't be in the ladies bog, i am not far off 53 and with the exception of France I’ve never seen men in the ladies

up until now many men have taken their female children to the gents

[Simonjt]

@Lockheart

This thread is a prime example of why the rest of the internet / the real world regards Mumsnet as being totally off-the-scale insane.

I’m just surprised that no one is outraged that poor innocent children were in McDonalds.

[Blossomtoes]

And of course unaccompanied girls in the women's are vulnerable if men have free access

What are they vulnerable to? They’re either in a locked cubicle or at a basin surrounded by women. Although they’re apparently at risk of seeing a naked woman washing her knickers.

[Simonjt]

@Thepossibility

And I'd be mad if my DH took my DD into the men's, she doesn't need to see dicks.

Another one with a husband who would pick up and dangle his child over the urinals, surely thats the issue, rather than it being the mens toilets?

[Tandora]

@Lockheart

This thread is a prime example of why the rest of the internet / the real world regards Mumsnet as being totally off-the-scale insane.

😂😂😂😂 fair

[Lockheart]

This thread is a prime example of why the rest of the internet / the real world regards Mumsnet as being totally off-the-scale insane.

[Thepossibility]

And I'd be mad if my DH took my DD into the men's, she doesn't need to see dicks.

[Thepossibility]

If he didn't go in and there was a rapist in there, how would he know? It's not like you were visible. Anyone could be hiding in there, he's protecting his small children.

[ChocolateHippo]

@Blossomtoes

There may be children in the women's toilets who don't have a parent there and who are vulnerable to strange men waltzing in

And the man in the OP didn’t want his daughters to be those children. How are they vulnerable by virtue of the mere presence of a man? If that was the case they’d never go anywhere.

If he didn't want his children to be unaccompanied, he could take them to the men's, couldn't he?

And of course unaccompanied girls in the women's are vulnerable if men have free access.

[Tandora]

@ChocolateHippo

But the girls in that case are accompanied by a parent who can protect them.

There may be children in the women's toilets who don't have a parent there and who are vulnerable to strange men waltzing in.

In both cases, there is a risk. In only one case do the children have a parent to protect them.

Ah but in this case “daddy” is the potentially dangerous man isn’t he? That’s why he’s a thread to the unaccompanied girls in the women’s loo, ( even though he’s with his daughters). So why would it be safer for him to take them into the mens loo-and to trust him to be their safeguard ? Don’t you know that dangerous men are also a threat to their own offspring?

This conversation couldn’t be more absurd.

[Blossomtoes]

There may be children in the women's toilets who don't have a parent there and who are vulnerable to strange men waltzing in

And the man in the OP didn’t want his daughters to be those children. How are they vulnerable by virtue of the mere presence of a man? If that was the case they’d never go anywhere.

[IstayedForTheFeminism]

Riiight 4yr and 6yr old girls are not going to be at all confused by the difference between flashing in a mens room or on the street. Shouldn’t they just “look away” when it’s not in a mens toilet too? Perhaps we just need to give that solution to older girls and women to just “look away” when flashed anywhere? After all, what going to happen to them? It’s just a naked penis. Not like the man’s even touching them. Cannot understand all the minimising going on here and the thinking it’s a good idea to teach little girls that it’s their responsibility to “look away” from a naked penis.

But I don't expect to see naked penises in the street because men shouldn't have them out in the street.

I would expect naked penises in the men's toilets because... well its the mens toilet and men need to pee out of them. Both my male dc say they've never actually seen other mens penises though.

If a dad is taking his young dd into the mens (because he isn't supposed to be in the ladies) he could give her a heads up that "the men might have their penises out, but we don't stop and look we go straight to the toilet that you can use"

In the same way my boys were told not to stare at naked women in the changing rooms. It's really not hard.

[Simonjt]

@Discovereads

And some posters, myself included, have asked their husbands and been told yes you can see dick in the mens room. I have asked for clarification as to how often this m would be in the specific situation of a 4yr old or 6yr old child coming in and he said their chances of accidentally seeing a naked penis is 10% if individual urinals with side barriers and 50% if it’s a trough type urinal.

So ignoring the posters who say otherwise, nice ‘data’ by the way.

[ChocolateHippo]

@Tandora

It’s unbelievable isn’t it.

No, what is unbelievable is to say that a child accompanied by a parent is in danger in the men's toilets. They have their parent there to protect them.

[Discovereads]

@Simonjt

If we’re waving our willies round so much, how come the only ones I’ve ever seen are my own and my sons? How come some posters who have asked their husband (I’m aware this is a crime on MN) have also said they haven’t seen any willies? Are we using some magical
mens toilets that you haven’t been to?

And some posters, myself included, have asked their husbands and been told yes you can see dick in the mens room. I have asked for clarification as to how often this m would be in the specific situation of a 4yr old or 6yr old child coming in and he said their chances of accidentally seeing a naked penis is 10% if individual urinals with side barriers and 50% if it’s a trough type urinal.

[ChocolateHippo]

@Discovereads

Laughable! So the “not all men are a danger” argument applies to what up to a half dozen lone strange men in the mens room towards two very young girls but not to one dad with two girls by his side to the up to a half dozen women in womens room. Hypocrisy at its finest.

But the girls in that case are accompanied by a parent who can protect them.

There may be children in the women's toilets who don't have a parent there and who are vulnerable to strange men waltzing in.

In both cases, there is a risk. In only one case do the children have a parent to protect them.

[Tandora]

@Discovereads

Laughable! So the “not all men are a danger” argument applies to what up to a half dozen lone strange men in the mens room towards two very young girls but not to one dad with two girls by his side to the up to a half dozen women in womens room. Hypocrisy at its finest.

It’s unbelievable isn’t it.

[Blossomtoes]

Hypocrisy at its finest.

Isn’t it just?

[Tandora]

The difference is that womens toilets have private cubicles. No one is regularly getting their genitals out in the common area unlike in the mens toilets

prescisely

[Discovereads]

@ChocolateHippo

It’s also a bit disturbing to me that you, a man, are arguing so passionately to have little girls in the mens toilet btw

It is offensive generally to men to make out that most men's toilets are not suitable places for young children. It suggests that a majority of men are incapable of behaving appropriately around small children. Some may be, but many fathers (probably the majority) take their young children of both sexes into the men's toilets without any problems at all. No doubt they would take exception to being viewed as negligent parents. It is inappropriate to try to shut down Simonjt as 'disturbing' just because he is arguing that many of the concerns suggested on here are unfounded.

Laughable! So the “not all men are a danger” argument applies to what up to a half dozen lone strange men in the mens room towards two very young girls but not to one dad with two girls by his side to the up to a half dozen women in womens room. Hypocrisy at its finest.

[waitingpatientlyforspring]

@ChiselandBits

at 4 and 6 they are a bit young to go in alone and given the mens' will have open urinals I can see his dilemma. Its a Macdonald's loo not a changing room - can adult women really not cope with a man who is obviously in charge of young girls and cares about their welfare being in there for a few minutes? Ideally there would be a family room or accessible loo but if he'd used that he no doubt would also be in the wrong.

Fully agree with you. McDonalds toilets can be grim even in the woman's so I can appreciate him not wanting to take them in there.

I wouldn't have been bothered, but I do think family/accessible toilets should become the norm for all toilets now. It would solve many problems, although would reduce the number of stalls available.

[Simonjt]

@Discovereads

The difference is that womens toilets have private cubicles. No one is regularly getting their genitals out in the common area unlike in the mens toilets. You cannot directly compare the two as if it is the same situation in regards to risk of being flashed by the opposite sex.

If we’re waving our willies round so much, how come the only ones I’ve ever seen are my own and my sons? How come some posters who have asked their husband (I’m aware this is a crime on MN) have also said they haven’t seen any willies? Are we using some magical
mens toilets that you haven’t been to?

[Tandora]

@Simonjt

Ah, because I’m not agreeing with you, I see. Well, you just enjoy continuing to invite men into womens toilets.

you are perfectly free to disagree with me

[Toughtips]

Given that the man explained why he was in there yabu. His young children are entitled to use the toilet and be helped by their parent.

He was trying to protect them from the general grim nature of mens toilets.

He was being a good dad.

You have a right to challenge him but after that explanation you should've let it go. Complaining about him to a manager was a step too far.

I feel sorry for some of the men today, guilty until proven innocent seems to be the mindset.