Weirdest things you've seen other parents do as they bring up or care for their DC?

[FortunesFave]

Here are mine.

I was in a public toilet in the cubicle and heard a woman come in with a small boy.

They went into a cubicle together and I heard her ask him repeatedly "Do you want to dirt!?"

She meant poo!

"Do you want to dirt???

Omg.

Second is SIL. When her DS was little...around 2 or so, she'd put chips for him INTO A BOWL OF COLD WATER so they'd cool faster.

Dump the cooked chips into a bowl of water. Leave them there for a bit and then drop the soggy pile onto a plate for the poor child.

WHY? What are yours?

[Rosesareyellow]

My cousin would come round with her LO who was about 1 or 2 at the time and if he hurt himself on something, would encourage him to blame and hit the inanimate object - so for example he would bump into the door handle, would cry, and then they would both ‘smack’ my door handle and say ‘naughty door’. I think they realised they had to put a stop to this when he started nursery - you can’t just smack someone and call them naughty because they accidentally bump into you 🤷‍♀️

[Redredwiney]

@Newmumatlast

The squash comments all really concern me. My child won't drink just water. Yes I started with just water but my partner drinks lots of squash all day and she was taking some from him. I'm not happy about it but it happened and now she refuses water. Entirely. Even really really weak squash. I have tried to make it better with higher juice content rather than crap squash and no aspartame but I actually feel really crap about it and sad that I'll look like an awful mum when out but I actually think I am a good mum. My child has quite a few issues around food and is really particular but so is my husband who has additional needs so I am conscious she may have either picked that up from him or it may be that I need to watch for additional needs. I am trying to get her into nursery in the hope peer pressure with other kids will help. Any advice I'm willing to take but don't think that people are always doing things they're happy about and arent having a real struggle behind closed doors.

And this explains perfectly why this thread is so judgmental.

Whilst everyone is enjoying being so judgy and superior, maybe try and understand there may be reasons a parent is acting a certain way.

Those who have happily contributed, I assume you’re perfect parents?

[CecilyP]

crazyguineapiglady
Hopeisallineed
It’s not just the sugar in squash! There’s loads of rubbish in those drinks and a 9 month old just doesn’t need it. Not at all bothered than I am being ‘judgey ’, it’s just plain wrong!

Sugar free squash won't do any harm.

The squash itself is not the problem; it is having it in a feeding bottle where the natural sugar and acid in the fruit is likely to cause tooth decay.

[talkalarm]

@Newmumatlast - ah love, it is what it is, you're doing your best. DS wouldn't take water at all and had chronic constipation issues as a result. The doctor recommended some squash and he took it and his health improved as result. I guess it's not perfectly ideal but truthfully how many of us eat and drink in a perfectly ideal way.

Once he got into childcare he would sip water but not much but it's built and built and he's fine drinking water at school now.

If it's worrying you just try to reduce the level of squash a tiny tiny bit at a time. Check the labels on the high juice stuff though, sometimes it's not as healthy as it seems and is high sugar.
All the best to you, it's so hard being a mum sometimes - we pretty much always find something to beat ourselves up about.

[Rosesareyellow]

Not quite on the same scale..but a girl at work used to have her mum prepare her lunch box every day. She would have a peeled satsuma wrapped in clingfilm in the lunchbox...she was 21

I think that’s kind of sweet actually. My DH sometimes makes my lunch and vice versa - although we stop at wrapping satsumas in cling film. It’s nice if someone makes your lunch. I’d find it very nostalgic if my mum made me a school pack lunch for work - it would be even more ironic because I’m a teacher

[talkalarm]

@Rosesareyellow - my mum used to do this with me 40+ years ago. I see now it's not something I would choose to do as parent but it never did me any harm, I've never hit anyone in my life

[Hopeisallineed]

There might be a ‘certain reason why a parent is acting this way’ but conversely a parent may be doing something harmful through ignorance or miseducation. Sometimes threads can actually educate. Recently saw a baby being given coke in a bottle. I’m sure the parent involved probably thought it was absolutely fine because they don’t realise the harm or maybe they had a really justified reason for doing it that I have no way of knowing?

[Hopeisallineed]

@CecilyP it’s the aspartame in it that is nasty.

[crazyguineapiglady]

[quote Hopeisallineed]@crazyguineapiglady ever heard of aspartame? It’s in most ‘sugar free’ squashes and sodas. Google it and you might change your mind.[/quote]
Er....

Both Cancer Research UK and the US National Cancer Institute have said sweeteners do not cause cancer.

"Large studies looking at people have now provided strong evidence that artificial sweeteners are safe for humans," states Cancer Research UK.

All sweeteners in the EU undergo a rigorous safety assessment by the European Food Safety Authority (EFSA) before they can be used in food and drink.

As part of the evaluation process, the EFSA sets an acceptable daily intake (ADI), which is the maximum amount considered safe to consume each day over the course of your lifetime.

You do not need to keep track of how much sweetener you consume each day, as our eating habits are factored in when specifying where sweeteners can be used.

Dietitian Emma Carder states: "Research into sweeteners shows they're perfectly safe to eat or drink on a daily basis as part of a healthy diet."

She also says they're a really useful alternative for people with diabetes who need to watch their blood sugar levels while still enjoying their favourite foods.

"Like sugar, sweeteners provide a sweet taste, but what sets them apart is that, after consumption, they do not increase blood sugar levels," she says.

It's been suggested that the use of artificial sweeteners may have a stimulating effect on appetite and, therefore, may play a role in weight gain and obesity.

But research into sweeteners and appetite stimulation is inconsistent. Also, there's little evidence from longer term studies to show that sweeteners cause weight gain.

[PeeAche]

Not weird, as such, but a bit miserable.

My SIL has a little baby and he watches TV in one of those bouncy chairs for "5 or 6 hours a day" (her words). She reckons he doesn't want to do anything else. He's 6 months now but it's been this way since newborn.

Last month, I was there for his first ever high chair meal. It was a birthday. We all sat down at the table and baby went into his high chair and her phone was then plopped in front of him, and we had to spend the whole dinner listening to it. He didn't eat with us. Just stared at the same thing on YouTube.

Sometimes I think my SIL might be depressed. I've been trying to talk to my brother (her DH) about it but I don't want to upset anyone. They're very defensive about their parenting.

[Hopeisallineed]

@crazyguineapiglady it’s not because it’s cancer causing! Try again!

[Goldbar]

The squash comments all really concern me. My child won't drink just water. Yes I started with just water but my partner drinks lots of squash all day and she was taking some from him. I'm not happy about it but it happened and now she refuses water. Entirely. Even really really weak squash. I have tried to make it better with higher juice content rather than crap squash and no aspartame but I actually feel really crap about it and sad that I'll look like an awful mum when out but I actually think I am a good mum. My child has quite a few issues around food and is really particular but so is my husband who has additional needs so I am conscious she may have either picked that up from him or it may be that I need to watch for additional needs. I am trying to get her into nursery in the hope peer pressure with other kids will help. Any advice I'm willing to take but don't think that people are always doing things they're happy about and arent having a real struggle behind closed doors.

@Newmumatleast. Although it's not great health-wise, the bit I'd be most concerned about is the impact on your DD's teeth. Sugary drinks are terrible for tooth decay. Is she seeing a dentist regularly and brushing with fluoride toothpaste twice a day?

Squash with a higher fruit content is going to be worse for teeth than sugar-free squash (although that is still harmful since acidic).

Can you -

• Limit squash to mealtimes
• Only offer water in between meals.
• Limit snacks to more tooth-friendly snacks like apples, carrot sticks and nuts

Also, remember you're the parent - if you and your DP can ditch the squash or he can drink it in a travel mug so she can't see it, then eventually your DD will probably go back to drinking water since it's unavailable.

[Christmas1988]

@Newmumatlast just ignore those comments or take them with a pinch of salt! I also give my children juice and think I’m a pretty good Mum!

[randomthings]

@Lostmarbles2021

I find it interesting that there are a few examples on this thread where one person says ‘that’s odd’ and another person says ‘I do that because of this’ about the same behaviour.

E.g. referring to ‘poo’ as ‘dirt’ - using another word for ‘poo’ because of a child’s phobia. Eating a full picnic after school - feeding child after school to avoid ‘hanger’

It reminds me that all behaviour has meaning once you understand the context. We all do things that others might view as ‘odd’ but there is usually a reason that is meaningful to us.

With the exception of abusive behaviours we should perhaps all just accept that there are differences in approach and live and let live?

Excellent post.

[crazyguineapiglady]

[quote Hopeisallineed]@crazyguineapiglady it’s not because it’s cancer causing! Try again![/quote]
Rather than me guessing what your worry about aspartame is, why don't you tell me? I'm not going to be able to guess what's in your head.

You told me to google and I did and the NHS says it's safe, not going to cause cancer, weight gain or diabetes...

[wannabeamummysobad]

@EmeraldShamrock

Suck a snot from her newborn child's nostril.
I bought her a sucker for baby 2, she preferred her own method.

My mum did the same for me. All the women in my family do and I will likely do the same for my child.

Ultimately the baby came out of you so why should you feel for comfortable introducing a foreign plastic object into your newborn as opposed to what is effectively skin to skin.
Are you telling MN that if you can't find the plastic sucker you'd leave your DC struggling to breath? Well your friends DC is the lucky child in my opinion and you the weirdo.

@ElizaDarcysDeeds I completely agree about some of the cultural insensitivity on this thread.

[Bentoforthehorde]

I'm that weird parent.
I don't keep toothbrushes in the bathroom, weirds me out. They go into the dishwasher after use and then into the cutlery drawer.

[godmum56]

[quote talkalarm]@Newmumatlast - ah love, it is what it is, you're doing your best. DS wouldn't take water at all and had chronic constipation issues as a result. The doctor recommended some squash and he took it and his health improved as result. I guess it's not perfectly ideal but truthfully how many of us eat and drink in a perfectly ideal way.

Once he got into childcare he would sip water but not much but it's built and built and he's fine drinking water at school now.

If it's worrying you just try to reduce the level of squash a tiny tiny bit at a time. Check the labels on the high juice stuff though, sometimes it's not as healthy as it seems and is high sugar.
All the best to you, it's so hard being a mum sometimes - we pretty much always find something to beat ourselves up about. [/quote]
If I drink plain water, in any quantity, not massive amounts but say a mug or a glassful, I get acid indigestion....I know...its weird, been like it all my adult life. I can drink it in mouthfuls with food but if I am just thirsty then no.....I wonder if there is something similar going on with children who won't drink plain water?

[CantBeAssed]

My ds has a speech delay. He didn't really talk until he was 3.5...to kick start his speech and give encouragement, I would have to repeat everything over and over, once he started talking I had to keep repeating words back with the correct pronunciation...to bystanders I probably sounded like a very patronising parent and completely bonkers. Sometimes there is a perfectly rational reason why parents seem ott. Best not to judge...I'm sure we all do things other parents would be judgemental of...

[Rosesareyellow]

Those who have happily contributed, I assume you’re perfect parents?

Not by any stretch. But I’m confident in doing my best so if someone judged me I wouldn’t get into a self pitying hissy fit about it, I think as a parent you need to have thicker skin than that. It takes some confidence I think to suck snot out your children’s noses in a culture where it’s not the norm - and they’ll know it’s not - I highly doubt those who are self assured enough with that choice are worried about me thinking it’s gross. And I’m entitled to think what I want as much as they are to sucking snot 🤷‍♀️
But neither am I that perfect person who never judges anyone around me. We all do it, it’s human nature. Kudos to you for being so very pure of heart…

[123fushia]

Took my 2.5 DD to my friend’s house on a warm day. Paddling pool was out. I changed my DD into a swimming costume. Friend took hers inside...children came out with costumes on underneath head to toe waterproof suits with hoods. They sat in the paddling pool to ‘play’ in the whole outfit.

[CecilyP]

Today 09:03 SapphosRock

I am currently breastfeeding my toddler in my own front room wearing a face mask. He has the norovirus and I don't want to catch it.

I'm sure if people saw us they would think it was was v odd.

Two years ago, maybe; not so much these day! Hope it works for you as we caught it off toddler DS and it was nasty.

[canary1]

If we go to ridiculous things we did ourselves… I was very upset that a curry was served at a big family event when my 15 month old couldn’t eat it. I seemed to think that 20 adults/ older kids should eat something that would suit my 15 month old😂 In my defense I didn’t get a nights sleep for a number of years 😂😂😂

[tabulahrasa]

@Aroundtheworldin80moves

A child we weren't allowed to say No to. Ever. Explaining to an 18month old why he shouldn't play with a boiling kettle for example. (While not saying the word No).

Agreed with the principle of the idea, but the reality was different.

I knew a child who became hysterical if anyone said no till she was about 5...

I don’t mean if they said no to her, I mean literally heard the word. Her mum was quite bemused by it, but it was easier to just avoid the word than cope with the sobbing child, it made answering some questions quite amusing though till she grew out of it.

[Strugglingtodomybest]

or maybe they had a really justified reason for doing it that I have no way of knowing?

I always assume this.