To think ds was entitled to say the teacher was wrong

[challengerequired]

Ds has an EHCP and as a consequence has a teaching assistant in some lessons.
Today this teaching assistant kept him behind after one lesson because ds had told her that he thought her answer to a question was wrong. She told him never to do that again, as it would confuse the girl next to him.
Aibu to be annoyed? 1 - because I think she's his TA so the other girl doesn't really come into it
2 - because a child should not be discouraged from challenging opinions? I think she should have used it as an opportunity to ask him why he thought she was wrong - get a conversation out of it?

[Nanny0gg]

@Cindy87

There are ways of saying you disagree with someone. I'm guessing your son probably said it in a way that meant the TA felt the need to keep him behind.

Also, she isn't his TA - it doesn't work like that.

Sometimes how kids report stuff back isn't exactly how it happened. I say that as both a parent and a teacher.

Of course she can be his TA if she's employed to support him as per his EHCP

[MichelleScarn]

I stand corrected and concede my mistake with good grace. OP's son's TA, take note!

Op says her son was wrong? Also think you should have a discussion with the school op, I think relationship has broken down, he doesn't want to show her his work, you say 'he isn't there to make her life easy' which while its correct, its a unusual way of looking at things.

[year5teacher]

I do also have experience of teaching a child who sadly was deeply unpopular because they always pointed out when people were “wrong” (or just using a word in one context when it COULD mean something else in another context). They would CONSTANTLY really desperately try and tell me I was wrong, even when I wasn’t, and then sit there and smirk - it was rude. So it’s not always as clear cut, I guess.

[year5teacher]

YANBU, one time I had had very little sleep due to DP having broken his foot and I demonstrated column subtraction wrong. (Something like 5620 - 4261 and forgot you couldn’t take 1 away from 0 hahaha) and all the kids just went with it except for one who pointed out it was wrong. No harm in it - it was wrong! Just goes to show them that teachers are not infallible figures of authority. I certainly don’t want them to see me like that.

[OnGoldenPond]

@steff13

That teacher must have trained at George W Bush University

It was Dan Quayle that spelled potato incorrectly, not George W Bush. It was at a spelling bee, and the card the school gave him to read from had spelled potato with an "e" on the end.

I stand corrected and concede my mistake with good grace. OP's son's TA, take note!

[dapsnotplimsolls]

if

[dapsnotplimsolls]

@Maray1967

And there’s a missed apostrophe in my last post!!

Was that deliberate to see of we could find it 😉

[Maray1967]

And there’s a missed apostrophe in my last post!!

[Maray1967]

Much depends here on how he said it.
In general terms, I’ve had to tell both of mine who are very keen on science to accept the GCSE version and just give the expected answers- teachers have been great here, explaining that they need to give the simplified GCSE version and when they do the subject at A level they can then write the more correct complex version. And presumably at university they find it out that the A level version is not quite correct as well .
I’m a good speller and I did once correct the teachers incorrect correction of a word. I put a post it note in his book with a polite note and the correct spelling. Heard nothing more but she knew I am a university lecturer in a humanities subject and presumably accepted it. Head of 6th form told DC1 to get me to check his UCAS statement for correct English as I would do a better job than her ...

[mam0918]

People saying teacher wouldnt be mad just for being told theyre wrong lol, I use to get in trouble for questioning the teaches and I was often right as many where older and where working of outdated info.

One I remember so specifically was a teach going mental at me in class, yelling and calling me stupid in front of everyone then putting me on dentention because he marked me wrong for saying there where '8 planets' in a class practice test and when he insisted there where 9 I told him 'Pluto wasnt classified a proper planet anymore and it was an ice dwarf' which is pretty common knowledge now but was fairly new classification at the time.

I was right (and it was pretty easy to look up and prove) but punished for it and the teacher treat me like crap for the rest of my time at school and sabotaged my GCSE by not letting me take the higher paper even though I was in the higher class and had near perfect test result in my mocks.

Some adults just cant handle 'a child' correcting them on something, its an ego issue.

[steff13]

That teacher must have trained at George W Bush University

It was Dan Quayle that spelled potato incorrectly, not George W Bush. It was at a spelling bee, and the card the school gave him to read from had spelled potato with an "e" on the end.

[Billben]

@Ellie56

I used to work as a TA and if the teacher made a mistake, I used to say, "Oh everyone's asleep this morning. Nobody's spotted Miss X's deliberate mistake."

Cue 30 kids and 1 teacher all madly scanning the text to find the error.

That’s fantastic 😂

[crochetmonkey74]

As a teacher this happens a lot, it sounds like maybe the info was being drip fed to the girl and though your child was right , maybe the full information with nuances etc despite being correct may be confusing until the foundations are understood. So for example, I teach a class where the students are struggling to get the lower grades, so whilst some things are 'true' it confuses them and may lead to them being even unable to access the lower grades as their answers would be so confused. Sometimes it's a bit of a blunt tool. I'd say trust the teacher as they may be doing a step by step guide to understanding. It doesnt sound like she was horrible, she seemed to be getting your child on side

[Notthissticky]

@Ellie56

I used to work as a TA and if the teacher made a mistake, I used to say, "Oh everyone's asleep this morning. Nobody's spotted Miss X's deliberate mistake."

Cue 30 kids and 1 teacher all madly scanning the text to find the error.

Love it! And I say that as a teacher

[Ellie56]

I used to work as a TA and if the teacher made a mistake, I used to say, "Oh everyone's asleep this morning. Nobody's spotted Miss X's deliberate mistake."

Cue 30 kids and 1 teacher all madly scanning the text to find the error.

[Hankunamatata]

Hmm some lsa are not a good fit. She is finding him challenging. Can you find out from her what exactly/specifics about him she finds challenging and suggest other tactics that work with your son.

It's hard not to get offended by lsa say about a child when they are your own but if she is willing to learn from you perhaps she could adapt for the better

[Footloosefancyfree]

I imagine it was the delivery of the question, many parents dont want to admit when there dc are rude. I do school swimming and swimming lessons and the many conversations I've had about children talking back and damn right rudeness, ignoring me and going under the water when I'm speaking and the parents response is ah well they are just having fun. They are very dismissive of poor behaviour which they wouldn't tolerate themselves. Teachers are with a constantly having to deal with poor behaviour when trying to teach I suspect you haven't got the Full facts and jumped onto your dc defense.

[Branleuse]

[quote challengerequired]@Branleuse yes![/quote]
Thats interesting in a good way.

[challengerequired]

@Branleuse yes!

[Branleuse]

@challengerequired

Hmm *@Branleuse* as a teacher I am very much expected to read up on and accommodate individual needs of students I teach...

Secondary?

[dapsnotplimsolls]

Based on your most recent posts, I agree with others that you should contact the Senco. It sounds like the relationship is deteriorating and the TA needs support to remedy the situation. There should also be a discussion about how your son speaks to her.

[CthulhuChristmas]

I used to correct teachers as an autistic teenager. I had one very memorable spat with a maths teacher where I insisted her answer of something like 12.2 times 10 to a power should be 1.22 times 10 to the next power because that is how standard form works. She insisted that her way was just 'a different way of doing it'. Yes, a way that will be marked wrong if the other students use it in the exam. The thing about autism is it can give you a very keen sense of fairness, and whether or not your DS was right, being told he can't challenge the TA's answers may have provoked this kind of frustration.

(I'm in teaching now, and because of my experiences I always listen if a student says I'm wrong - and if I don't think I am, I explain why instead of just being dismissive.)

[challengerequired]

@NailsNeedDoing it was her who suggested email contact to improve the working relationship

[challengerequired]

Hmm @Branleuse as a teacher I am very much expected to read up on and accommodate individual needs of students I teach...

[NailsNeedDoing]

@challengerequired

We had also agreed after our talk we'd keep email contact if any issues arose - so why didn't she email me about this?

Because it’s not really an issue, at least not one that should take her time away from the students she supports and into an office to write an email.

Why do think the LSA is wrong for encouraging your son to show her his work? How is she supposed to support him with it if she can’t see it?

Honestly, it sounds like you just don’t like her. But she’s doing a difficult job and being paid like shit for it, maybe you should give her a break.