His ex used to "spoil" him

[Maaanajs]

Hello,
I know this is weird as it's made me feel uncomfortable.
My income is quite low (not helped by the coronavirus). I can't buy boyfriend amazing things for his birthday, just nice little thoughtful gifts.
For example, I bought him a new coat and some of his favourite aftershave.

Boyfriend's job is quite average but he "joked" about how his ex spoiled him e.g. gucci and other designers for his birthday and christmas.

I don't know much about his ex tbh, I don't know what she works as but apparantly she could afford them.

Anyway, we've been together 2 years and he was with his ex 4 years for me.

I just feel a bit useless now. I could never afford to just buy something designer on the whim

[SunshineCake]

@Marie84

My bf always buys me expensive birthday and Christmas presents but he can afford it! I don't earn half as much as him and whenever I ask what he wants he says "nothing, save your money" obviously I do get him something but it's normally small meaningful things which he seems to like! I think a coat and aftershave is perfectly acceptable and a lovely present! I'm sure it was just a throwaway comment and I really wouldn't worry about it x

You need to raise your bar I think.

[SunshineCake]

@Okayokayok

Next time you're having sex tell him your ex used to last way longer.

God, I hope she doesn't see him again never mind have sex with him!

[newnameforthis123]

2 year in and his response to nice gifts from you is to compare you to his ex? Ugh. Next!

[OldBean2]

I would suggest you tell him that your previous partner made you cum every time, but you thought it might be rude to mention it!

Your gifts sound lovely, him not so much.

[daisyjgrey]

Evidently being spoilt didn't keep them together so...

[DrinkFeckArseGirls]

It’s a good point that Friendsoftheearth makes - have you ever seen that designer swag? Or did the ex take it back after she was fed up with this freeloader
Or it never happened.

[Awwlookatmybabyspider]

Tell him to piss off back to her then!

[Pancakeorcrepe]

You sound lovely and he sounds like an absolute dick!

[Friendsoftheearth]

I am not sure I even believe it, if you have never seen one item of his so called designer collection - then he was either lying or joking. Unless his ex took it all back on departure and his best friend for good measure.

I would be more concerned as to why he is still even thinking about his ex on his birthday or anything that she did for him.

Based on this, I would be rethinking whether he was the right one for me, unless it was a joke made in very poor taste.

[twoshedsjackson]

Possible replies to your boyfriend:
"Comparison is the thief of joy"
"Your ex, eh? Why exactly did she get fed up with you?
As many PP's have said, "Go back to her then!"
or as Curlsand Curves suggested, a Mrs Brown-style "That's nice!" (Probably the best response)
Did he really think he could spur you into trying harder?
I wonder how the ex would feel if she knew she was being held up as an example - or even if it's completely true......

[DrinkFeckArseGirls]

I’d take the coat back and never see him again. I could not get past this comment.

[Rainbowqueeen]

Op this will be your life if you stay with this guy. Put down, comparisons, being made to feel less than.

You deserve better than that. Move on and find it

[Mittens030869]

Thinking about it, I wouldn't tolerate such ingratitude from my DDs of 11 and 8, never mind a grown man. It's just so ill mannered.

[movingonup20]

I didn't have the money to spoil dp, he knows that, but I did cook an amazing meal (though I say it myself)

[Anon9990]

@CiderJolly

Say ‘fuck off back to your ex then’.

Job done.

This would be my reply 👏

[IdblowJonSnow]

@Coffeekisses

I agree, being into brands (imo) is tasteless and shows the person wearing it is a show off with not enough imagination of their own.

He's rude and immature.

My DH earns a fair bit but wouldn't buy me a coat and perfume for my birthday!

[Coffeekisses]

Do people honestly still care about “brands”? I thought it was a 90s thing. Or a teenage thing. (Possibly because I was a teenager in the 90s.) I don’t know anyone who really cares now!

[netsybetsy]

[quote bunnyonthemantle]@netsybetsy I love Sherry[/quote]
Yeah she doesn't take shit from any man but she does it in a humorous way. Wish that book had been around in My youth!

[Mittens030869]

A coat and aftershave sounds like a substantial gift, to me!

^This. Spending nearly £100 is very generous. He's an ungrateful git and a complete poser to be going on about Gucci!!

[anditgoeson]

OP when I was younger I had a boyfriend who bought designer stuff so I bought him an expensive designer watch and as much as he loved it he told me never to spend that much money on him again, that if I was going to spend money like that I should spend it on myself, because he was nice.

Your boyfriend sounds spoilt and manipulative, dont waste your young years on a tosspot. Please find a new nice boyfriend ❤

[bunnyonthemantle]

@netsybetsy I love Sherry

[netsybetsy]

@Angelina82

Next time you have sex ‘joke’ that it was ok but not as good as sex with your ex was.

Hah! You beat me to it

[netsybetsy]

Read this book:

www.sherryargov.com

If a guy is ungrateful, you don't try harder you do less. Much less! Better still, dump.

[netsybetsy]

Comparing you unfavourably to his ex? Fuck that shit!

How would he like if next time you're in bed you told him he did okay but your ex gave you better orgasms?

You can do better than this guy.

[BiblioX]

I really hope you take on board how many posters are saying this is not a sign of a nice man.
I’d honestly be getting rid of him.
One year I got my husband an expensive metal detector for his birthday, another year he got a cheese board! He is always appreciative of the simple fact that I care. Yours sounds so entitled and selfish...and rather bourgeois/nouveau riche/vulgar tbh.