My friend of 2 years is turning 30 this month.
She's hosting a birthday party in her garden, for friends and family.
She's asked us to go, we've said no and she's taken it very badly.
So here's the details -
Said friend lives 1.5hour drive from us, the afternoon will be starting at 3.30pm.
Firstly, she has no children herself and has asked that we find a sitter "if possible".
We have a 4 month old baby. I've never left the baby with anyone and I don't plan to do that now. Baby is also breastfed!!
We've not travelled that far before with the baby and realistically would have to allow longer for the journey to include stops etc.
If it starts at 3.30pm we wouldn't be able to stay very long as we would have to head home for a reasonable bed time etc.
I've told my friend we won't be going but have suggested we plan a day out together at some point where we can spend longer together and start earlier in the day.
My friend replied and said
"if you can't travel to my birthday then why can you travel to a day out. Don't expect me to make the effort for you if you can't make the effort for me.
We don't have children so what if we don't want to start a day out earlier, you have to take our circumstances into consideration.
I have other friends with kids who are unable to get a sitter and are coming 3.30pm and have no issues. You have to make compromises"
She's not spoken to me for a week now!
Bare in mind her other friends all live local to her which if I was local of course I would just pop in.
I've known her for two years now and I've always made the effort for birthdays and regular meet ups etc.
I know it's a 30th and a special birthday but I just feel like it's a long way to go with the baby for a short drop in, which is what it would have to be starting at that time.
AIBU or is my friend being difficult?
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AIBU?
Which one of us is being unreasonable?!
292 replies
Doradays · 01/08/2020 12:58
OP posts:
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