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AIBU?

To wonder if I'm the only person who won't be sending kids to school in August

242 replies

user8558 · 23/06/2020 10:20

AIBU to wonder if I'm the only one who won't be sending DC back to school in August.

I initially thought "wait and see", but now the details are coming out about what it will be like. And my instinct is telling me to keep them off until normality resumes. Or something closer to normality.

Homeschooling has been going well. I'm not worried about their education.

I do worry about the lack of social interaction, but feel on balance this need wouldn't be satisfied adequately until things are a bit more relaxed anyway.

I wouldn't be expecting any work to be set for my kids, I'll take care of their home learning.

I cannot be the only one feeling this and thinking this?

Or is everyone going back in August/September?

OP posts:
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Am I being unreasonable?

460 votes. Final results.

POLL
You are being unreasonable
81%
You are NOT being unreasonable
19%
La1ka · 23/06/2020 12:07

@user8558
Can I ask what your children think? Do they want to return? How will they feel if all their friends go back and they don’t? Will it impact their social lives?

You say school is for learning and not for social but that isn’t true at all. They’re your children’s and it’s your choice, but I think it should be about what your kids think too, and you make a joint decision.

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averysuitablegirl · 23/06/2020 12:09

Imhe being at home and worrying about school starting again was worse for my Y6 child.

He was very angry about going back, esp as his sister's year hasn't, but just being out there in the world doing normal things has reduced his anxiety about covid immeasurably.

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TimeWastingButFun · 23/06/2020 12:09

I thought they said September now? I certainly wouldn't be sending them in during the summer holidays, they've been stuck indoors doing schoolwork for months and deserve a break.

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TimeWastingButFun · 23/06/2020 12:10

September, yes if there is social distancing.

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edwinbear · 23/06/2020 12:10

You'll let them return to rugby but not school? The longer you keep them off OP the greater their anxiety will be when they do finally return, especially if they are in the minority of children who are still at home whilst their peers are back at school.

My Y6 has been a few weeks now. There are 3 or 4 who haven't returned, not because they are shielding but because their parents 'feel uncomfortable'. The children have noticed their absence and are commenting on it, sadly their friendship groups are moving on without them which is going to make it so much harder for these children when they do finally get back.

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SorrelBlackbeak · 23/06/2020 12:13

The sailing clubs near me are planning to open on 4th July...

My y5 DS went back this week. He was a bit worried about it, so we'd agreed he would do 1 week and could then stay at home for the rest of term if he needed to. He announced last night that he'd go until the end of term.

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Xylophonics · 23/06/2020 12:13

I think the concept of relative risk has gone out the window for some people. We have always coped with the concept of possible risks -getting into a car, having a minor operation etc etc.

To wait till their is no risk will be a long wait.

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CoronaIsComing · 23/06/2020 12:17

How long would you be prepared to keep them off for then? Years?

DS is in year 6 and went back yesterday.

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minipie · 23/06/2020 12:20

Good luck explaining to your kids why all their friends are back and playing together and they are not.

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Bookoffacts · 23/06/2020 12:27

If you take them out of school long term, for your own anxiety, that's not good.
It won't be well received.

You'll probably get away with it if you're middle class but if you were working class you would get in trouble with social services. I hate that it's like this but it is.

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museumum · 23/06/2020 12:31

My ds will rush back in August and he’ll also go to holiday club before that if they can get open in phase three.
He’s had a couple of play dates this last week and can easily have fun without getting too close and physical with his friends.

If I’d known we were going to be living some kind of isolated pioneer / homestead type life I’d have had three four five kids but as it is my son is an inly child and relies on school and local family friends for company. It’s not hood for children to have only their parents as playmates. We love him unconditionally and that obviously affects all our interactions with him. He needs to spend time with other people who don’t.

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CHIRIBAYA · 23/06/2020 12:37

Those that will survive and flourish in this crisis (or any crisis for that matter) are those that can adapt and to deny your children the opportunity to develop those skills is doing them a greater disservice than you think.

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Oldbutstillgotit · 23/06/2020 12:37

John Swinney is to make an emergency statement this afternoon re schools .

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TyphoidMary2020 · 23/06/2020 12:39

Is that for Scotland alone?

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jerometheturnipking · 23/06/2020 12:44

@TyphoidMary2020

Is that for Scotland alone?

I'd say so seeing as he's not Gavin Williamson. The current proposals from Holyrood have not gone down universally well up here.
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Whenwillthisbeover · 23/06/2020 12:45

Will the school keep your child’s place until you wish to return or might you find yourself losing it?

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IndecentFeminist · 23/06/2020 12:47

By all means keep them off. But don't pretend it is for their sakes, or safety. It is to appease your anxiety.

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Sockmonster23 · 23/06/2020 12:49

Mine is going back And I will also never forgive them for the lies and the way in which they have conducted themselves throughout this ‘pandemic’ own your fear and muzzle up ,keep your distance and stay indoors live your life but don’t expect that kids should stay off due to fears and anxieties from constant scaremongering and contradictions from media and governments. Plenty of scientist and doctors have spoken quite openly about this.

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TyphoidMary2020 · 23/06/2020 12:50

Yes they don’t usually work together Grin

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LadyRoughDiamond · 23/06/2020 12:53

OP, your replies all seem to centre around 'I': I am anxious, I will supply work, I don't think it's a good idea.

When you're a parent it's no longer about you, but what is best for them. Sometimes this goes against what you want. That's why parenting is so bloody hard.

You clearly need to separate any anxiety you have, from parenting your children. Send them to school - the risk is minimal compared to the risk to mental health. If your anxiety is that bad get some help, but dont use it as an excuse to damage your children's future.

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ScatteredMama82 · 23/06/2020 12:56

Children need to be in school, for both education and socialising. we ar in England. My DS2 (Reception) has been back for 3 weeks and has taken the changes in his stride. He's absolutely loving being back at school with his friends. My DS1 (Yr 5) went back yesterday and was beaming from ear to ear when I collected him. He loved it, and they are in a big hall, sitting at individual tables. I was worried that would upset him, but he's absolutely fine with it. He is quite a sensitive boy and often takes change badly, but he was prepared for this and I think he had quite enough of being at home 24/7.

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IndieRo · 23/06/2020 12:58

My 3 dc are due back the end of August and I have every intention if sending them back.

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LunaLoveFood · 23/06/2020 13:14

I think it's important for them to go back as soon as possible. It will help them to learn strategies for coping with changes in the future to help prevent future anxiety. It will also help to build resilience to work with smaller groups with the changes and to be able to adapt to new situations. Both have mine have gone back .

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CallmeAngelina · 23/06/2020 13:18

@formerbabe

My dc will be back as soon as the fucking government says that they're no longer banned from the school premises.

I'm quite angry as you may be able to tell Wink

Well, they're not "banned from the school premises," though, are they?
My school is open for all year groups as of yesterday and anyone who wished to send their kids in could apply and then the rota was set accordingly.
It's been lovely in class (Year 4) this week.
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BernardsarenotalwaysSaints · 23/06/2020 13:20

I'm England & 1 of my 4 school age dc is back. I was slightly apprehensive, not because of the virus but with how he'd react to the changes. He's really enjoying himself & is a much happier child than he was after the Easter holiday when reality set in about being at home. My older 3 dc are liking the walk to & from school & getting to say "Hi" to a few of their friends that are attending. I'll be sending them back in September (& packing my youngest off to nursery) without hesitation.

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