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AIBU?

3 hours "feeding" my baby

46 replies

Delbelleber · 22/06/2020 21:30

I've just spent 3 hours almost constantly breast feeding my 5 week old and he was fussing like mad getting frustrated by the end of that time so I made him up a 4oz bottle which he guzzled down like he was starving. I know breast is best and all that but wtf are my breasts doing while he's feeding that length of time because they surely aren't filling him up. Don't get me wrong I love breast feeding and I know long feeding sessions are normal at this age but I'm just feeling frustrated and sad that I can't give him the satisfactory feed which he really needed.

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Am I being unreasonable?

28 votes. Final results.

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Rebelwithallthecause · 23/06/2020 07:49

At 5 weeks it could be a number of things -

They go through a leap at 5 weeks so could be fussier and feed more as it’s effectively a growth spurt

You may have a hormonal change if your period is on its way causing a change to milk temporarily

Babies are babies and will do things we may never understand

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covidco · 23/06/2020 07:49

Getting annoyed at the breast is really normal, I'm surprised your other 2 haven't done it! The thrashing at the breast, headbutting it, suckling then coming off screaming. All normal, all part of cluster feeding.

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covidco · 23/06/2020 07:47

Yep, totally normal. Cluster feeding. Usually in the evenings. It's a good thing! You should let him do it as it's putting in an advanced order to your boobs to make more milk as he's going to need it going forward as he grows.

Don't pump "to see how much you are producing" it doesn't work like that.

Don't give him formula "to fill him up". Yes, it'll stop the cluster feeding and he will seem satisfied but it will impact your supply in the long term and possibly cut your breastfeeding journey short.

Leave him to do it, it's what he needs to do and doesn't mean you aren't producing enough.

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Delbelleber · 23/06/2020 07:03

Thank you all ❤️

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Merryoldgoat · 23/06/2020 00:18

@randolph78

It was soul destroying at times. I was never once enforced, never leaked and the baby was never full. Not once. I knew that something was amiss after DS1 fed for 4 hours straight but cried the second I took him off but it took a bit longer to really be sure. I did start having to top him up - he was massive and very hungry.

A very kind midwife was very honest with me and said it just might not work and not to beat myself up.

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MildDrPepperAddiction · 23/06/2020 00:15

Look up the book Wonder weeks. It tells you all about the developmental leaps your baby is making and when to expect them and the behavior that can come with it.

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randolph78 · 22/06/2020 23:56

Hi Merryoldgoat. Good to hear your story. My kids are much older now but I still remember the trauma of breastfeeding and the judgement that some are so willing to hand out. 3 hours was quite a short session for mine. We did nothing but feed and it hurt all the time. I can't use the lanolin based nipple emollients due to allergies which didn't help. My breasts never leaked and never really felt heavy. They did grow a little and small drops came out sometimes when feeding. But the kids were hungry all the time. With my son, I had to stop feeding at around 7 weeks due to illness and needing to take medication you can't BF on. At that point he drank a few ounces and threw it all up - he had bad reflux for many months but it had never been spotted before as he was not able to take enough in to regurgitate it. Many women will find a way through a few prolonged feeding sessions and it's great there's support and encouragement to do so. It's not that easy for everyone though.

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jgjgjgjgjg · 22/06/2020 23:44

Did you offer the bottle using paced feeding techniques? When presented with a bottle babies will instinctively such. If the bottle is upright or semi upright that will result in the baby appearing to guzzle the milk. They will also likely continue sucking long after it is empty. That's a sign that the baby takes comfort in sucking, not that they are hungry necessarily.

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TinyPigeon · 22/06/2020 23:18

This is completely normal. he's trying to build your supply. Get a flask and a box set. It won't be forever.

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NooneElseIsSingingMySong · 22/06/2020 23:17

I remember these days with DD. She would cluster feed all evening! Someone shared this video recently which explains the mechanics of breast feeding which I found really interesting (even though those days are long gone for us!) link to a Facebook post of a Breast feeding support worker explaining things.

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notmycar · 22/06/2020 23:15

My 3rd was like this, still is to an extent - loves a long evening feed/doze even at 7 months.
Babies will guzzle formula regardless of whether it's required or not and expressing isn't a reliable measure of milk supply - some women struggle to get a drop despite baby thriving.
Wet and dirty nappies are the most reliable indicators of how feeding is going so if you're happy with those then I'd just suggest settling in to the feed with a drink and snacks.

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HoldMyLobster · 22/06/2020 23:13

Yes I experienced that most with my third baby, who was just so hungry compared to my other two.

One very memorable evening I fed him non-stop until I was totally exhausted and my boobs felt totally deflated, then I had to get some sleep. I handed him to someone else for about 6 hours, slept for that whole time, then woke up with bursting boobs.

He had succeeded in increasing my milk supply to meet his needs.

He's now 15 and 6' tall, and sitting in front of me arguing with his father.

You're doing really well OP - hang in there!

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Goodgollymiss · 22/06/2020 23:03

It's all normal, what your doing, how your feeling, how baby is acting... every baby is different and develop different little habits... sounds like u are doing great FlowersCakeWine

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Bluewarbler27 · 22/06/2020 22:51

God I wouldn’t go back to those early days for anything. My daughter seemed to be permanently attached and as soon as you removed it from her mouth she’d scream her lungs out🙄. I fell pregnant when she was 5 months old and she started to dislike breast feeding not long after. We limped along until she was about 10/11 months. I’m glad my youngest wasn’t the same ! Hang in there xx

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GrumpyHoonMain · 22/06/2020 22:46

Up to 6 weeks babies often do feed like mad to establish your supply. Once it is established, provided you don’t mess it up with formula, you will have a much easier time of it.

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FusionChefGeoff · 22/06/2020 22:40

He's just putting in his order for the next few days!!! All that suckling will boost your supply just in line with what he needs Smile

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Quackersandcheese3 · 22/06/2020 22:39

Sounds pretty normal to me. My little dingbat kid was on the breast about 7 /8 hours a day. I know it’s a bit inconvenient but make a wee nest for yourself, some snacks , drink and a the remote control. Feet up and chill x

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Merryoldgoat · 22/06/2020 22:29

My post will be unpopular, but I experienced this with my children. My supply was just inadequate. There was nothing I could do. They were angry at the breast and obviously hungry and both were much happier when I moved to the bottle. Which was really upsetting. I come from a large family, lots of babies around and the women all breastfed easily. I was very comfortable with the idea and had lots of support. It just didn’t work for me.

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Delbelleber · 22/06/2020 22:09

Thank you for all your replies. He is my 3rd baby and I breastfed them all. He is the only one I have done top ups with. He's feeding again now. I know it's normal to feed for a long time but I know he was hungry when I gave him that bottle. He was getting very annoyed at the breast. He's much more relaxed now just suckling away.
I can only say I love breastfeeding because we have a good latch and I learnt the latching from an amazing midwife with dc2. Dc1 had a terrible latch and I pushed through with the pain because I had put a lot of pressure on myself to breastfeed.

I am changing sides when feeding and there is no tongue tie.

Thanks for the support.

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Mangomumma · 22/06/2020 22:08

Totally normal! I used to be stuck in a chair 7pm-10pm with baby that would fuss, feed, snooze, repeat. It will get better.

kellymom.com/parenting/parenting-faq/fussy-evening/

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FlyingFishes · 22/06/2020 22:07

Do get a lactation consultant to check for tongue tie. For me, it went from 3 hour feeding session to 15mins

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bluebluezoo · 22/06/2020 22:01

I also found 5/6 was fairly key- it was about that time my supply settled down to making only what the baby needed and the boobs felt more normal.

Also baby became more aware around that age and seemed to recognise being away from me and not liking it!

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rabbitheadlights · 22/06/2020 22:01

When you say 5 weeks how close is that to 6? 6 weeks is prime time for a growth spurt and mine fed solid for days??

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Fiddlesticks345 · 22/06/2020 22:01

When she was a few weeks old my baby would cluster feed for 6 hours straight- no exaggeration! I was convinced she wasn’t getting enough milk but was also worried about ‘nipple confusion’ and supply so I just stuck at it and kept putting her on when she seemed to want it. It was hideous at the time but now at 12 weeks my supply is great and she’s growing like the clappers.

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Maltay · 22/06/2020 22:01

It gets so much easier at 12 weeks! The first 9 weeks was pure hell I still don't know how I managed it. You're doing so well, you're not doing anything wrong it is just hard!
As long as plenty of wet nappies don't worry, mine only pood about once a week at this age as they can absorb breast milk very efficiently

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