To not want to sponsor for this cause?

[sallagadoola]

Prepared to get flamed here, as I can’t work out if I’m being a complete cow or totally reasonable!
Also name changed as details could be outing.
So I have a few friends who’s kids go to a local drama school.
It’s a warehouse type setting which is owned by a lady who runs drama/singing/dancing classes.
Maybe not relevant but the classes aren’t particularly cheap as I’ve looked into it for my kids.
The business seems to do very well and puts on yearly shows with a hundred or so kids involved (only know this as I took my kids to watch a show there one year)
Anyway back to the point. They’ve decided that their air con system needs updating and are asking for £15,000 in donations.
They’ve asked all the kids to raise money. Some are doing sponsored silences, sponsored walks, 12 hour singathons etc.
It’s been all over my Instagram asking for donations and I’ve quietly avoided the posts.
However now on a group chat, 2 of them have asked why I’ve not sponsored their kids.
If I’m being honest I don’t think donating money for air conditioning for the benefit of kids attending an hour class a week is very worthy.
My kids attend karate, dancing, badminton classes etc and not a single one of those venues has air conditioning and it doesn’t bother the kids in the slightest.
I feel like the owner of drama business is a CF and should either stick some fans in the drama studio or open a window.
Do I tell my friends the reason why I don’t want to donate, or just plead poverty (half true with reduced hours due to coronavirus)

[MadameButterface]

wow, the cheek. big nope.

[dancinfeet]

@WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll I completely agree. There is a difference between fundraising for smaller items and equipment to benefit the members, and quite another fundraising for luxuries. I know a theatre school who fundraised a few thousand for unspecified renovations, they had no heating in any of their studios but opted to have a bar installed, and applied for an alcohol license all with the fundraising money (!) for the 'comfort' of audience members when they did shows a few times a year. Unsurprisingly they went bust by the end of the same year, and restarted up again under a new name in another venue.

[WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll]

dancinfeet - Nicely summed up.

I know that lots of small business owners are struggling - even before COVID-19 hit - but, as you rightly say, aircon (especially in the UK) is a luxury. In fact, it's the kind of thing that a business that DOES have loads of spare money might choose to spend some of it on.

By all means ask your customers and associates for help if the figures aren't stacking up and leave it to them to decide if they want to pay more to keep the facility or not to and to potentially lose it. I would still have thought that increasing the prices was a fairer thing to do rather than badgering unconnected people to 'donate' - but I suspect she knows that parents (whose children are the ones actually benefiting) might not gladly pay an extra pound or two per session for an air-conditioned facility. Much easier to make it into a 'community fundraising event' rather than ask those who will use it to simply pay more.

Of course, anybody can invite financial support for any cause - charity or not - but it's a request and not something that people should be shamed or emotionally blackmailed into giving towards.

There's nothing whatsoever stopping me from setting up a GoFundMe as follows:
Funding Request: Help me urgently raise a million!
Target amount: £1million
Description of Cause: I've always really wanted to be a millionaire - pleeeease make my dream come true!

Not that you nasty, cold-hearted, selfish people on MN will care enough to support this valuable cause

[Candleabra]

My daughter did gymnastics years ago. The fees were £££££ and some kids went for over 20 hours a week, and it was a huge place, there were always loads of kids there. Most of the coaching was done by the senior team members and their 'wages' were offset by their own fees. The management were always sending begging texts asking parents to clean the equipment (they suggested a rota system!), asking for help with repairs ("does anyone know of a builder who would do our roof for free"), it was never ending.

[AJPTaylor]

Awkward. Not quite as awkward as old friends kids asking for donations so their kids can go to Africa to help poor villagers. That really is cringe!

[wednesday32]

Having volunteered at a community theatre in my area, I know how hard it is to get funding to help keep the building upto standards. A theatre group rely on people buying tickets for shows to keep money coming in, so I understand why they are doing this.The more comfortable the surroundings, the more willing people will be to come along. However it is very rude for someone to come out and ask why you haven't donated. Just reply 'Hi Emma*, thanks for your message, hope you and the family are well during these hard times. I have seen the fundraising posts and think it is a great way to raise funds, however I have already donated to charity this month,. Good luck with the cause.x'

[dancinfeet]

Why do people think Business Owner = large amount of funds to finance their business?
It's not unreasonable to fundraise for whatever they want. Just because someone has a small business doesn't mean that they are making a huge profit from it, and there might not be an excess left at the end of the tax year to pay for upgrades to the premises.
I pay myself basic minimum wage for my dance teaching hours, and nothing for my endless hours doing paperwork, exams, shows etc, all for the pleasure of the parents and students. My students have fundraised for all kinds of things for the studio - barres, mirrors, an airtrack and so on - all things that directly benefit the students that there is not excess money in the pot to pay for without fundraising. We never demand that parents/students contribute though, only those that want to, do.
I do think that aircon is an unnecessary luxury though! The CFs are your friends for demanding that you sponsor their kids, not the theatre school for choosing to fundraise. Also, even if a club is registered as a charity it's only the excess that gets ploughed back into the group after expenses - our local gymnastics club is a a registered charity and are always fundraising for equipment (in the same way that my dance school does). None of their staff are volunteers, all of their self employed freelance coaches get paid way more than I do from the funds of the charity and are guaranteed an hourly wage. For me, an unexpected business expense means that I have to take a smaller wage that month, like many self employed people. On the outside, it looks as though I have a great money making enterprise (and who knows, one day it might be) but 80% of my monthly turnover goes out again in expenses - rent for the premises, staff wages, insurances, memberships, cleaning products, stationery and so on.

[trixiebelden77]

My dance classes were without aircon.....in Australia......everyone survived.

I’d just say your charitable budget is already allocated.

[WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll]

That actually makes more sense: the frozen food you buy would spoil and cause a severe national health crisis if Tesco couldn't otherwise afford to safely freeze it (), but the kids will be just fine if they get sweaty for an hour or so.

[Alwaystwomagpies]

Got to be honest but much as I love your kids and enjoyed going to their shows I think the owner is rude to expect the kids to fund raise something that she wants for her business. This should really be covered by the fees you already pay.
I’m also upset that you both would think it’s ok to question my involvement or not as I always think charitable giving is private and entirely up to individuals. I have recently given a lot to various charities I support but wouldn’t demand you do too. Please don’t let’s fall out over this.

[FunTimes2020]

@redwoodmazza

Tell them you have just contributed to Tesco's new freezers and have no money left!!!

Brilliant!

[Viviennemary]

I'd sponsor them for 5p each.

[WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll]

It gets so tiresome when people seize on a 'cause' that means a lot to them (or even directly benefits their family) and, instead of just publicising it and throwing out open invitations for people to give if they would like to (and are able), seem to think that theirs is the only charity or (perceived) good cause in the world, or at least the most important.

Millions of people in the world are starving and unable to get clean water to drink, but never mind them, far more urgent is some British woman's luxury business where she's too mean or insolvent to adequately facilitate her classes and too dim or lazy to open a few windows to prevent the children from getting a bit hot.

Incidentally, have the children or their parents actually complained about the unbearable temperatures or has she just seized on them and their friends and families as her means to free betterment of her own business assets?

[SheWranglesRugRats]

Fuck that. Almost as cheeky as when the local private school asked for donations to send a class to the Sydney olympics.

[redwoodmazza]

Tell them you have just contributed to Tesco's new freezers and have no money left!!!

[WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll]

for that reason I don't give to other charitys

Not even other charities - this is a private business. I don't think many people would give if Tesco advertised on TV asking 'people who believe in our mission to provide food to the nation' to donate altruistically to their balance sheet without getting anything in return.

[LudaMusser]

I have a monthly DD set up to give to a charity that I strongly support and for that reason I don't give to other charitys

[ListenToIronMaidenBaby]

I cannot believe they asked you why you hadn't donated! I'd try and come out of that what's app group...nightmare!

Also reminded me of someone I don't even know why I have on my Facebook but they asked the FB universe to donate to their kids nursery for a new kind of toilet....as 'PFB just loves it there so please donate!'

Speechless.

[WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll]

Even if the children attended full-time, 5 days a week, they still don't need aircon. It's very nice, but it really is an unnecessary luxury in the UK. Why does she think that they need it, when the vast majority of properties in the UK don't have it? Most of us rely on central heating or standalone heaters in the cold months and fans or opening windows in the very few hot weeks. If the kids are there for an hour a week, they're looking at benefiting for maybe 15 or so hours a year at most.

If she's admitting that the facilities that she provides to paying customers are unsuitable, then she needs to close her business forthwith - or at the very least significantly reduce the price she charges, in acknowledgement of this serious shortcoming.

I agree with the PP saying to tell them you like to ensure that the very limited funds you have available for charitable giving are used as efficiently as possible, so can they just supply their charity number to enable you to make sure that the taxman can add his extra GA contribution in and to check their accounts and how they run their affairs on the charities commission website.

Part of me wouldn't be surprised if, in the not too distant future, she discovers that she sadly has to close her business and sell the premises. Very nice premises at that: great central location; sizeable accommodation area; USP is that, unlike all comparable local properties, this one is equipped with the latest state-of-the-art aircon....

[NotEverythingIsBlackandWhite]

Sorry @OrchidJewel I had a bit of a brainstorm and wrongly attributed the opening post to you instead of @sallagadoola.

[NotEverythingIsBlackandWhite]

'Dear friends,
I wish your DC all the best in their fund-raising efforts but, due to limited funds, I only donate to my chosen charities.
OrchidJewel

[Isolemnlyswear]

Cant they just open some windows instead, fresh air is free!!

[sallagadoola]

Well at least I feel better about not donating now!
They’ve not asked again so hoping I can just skim over the issue!

[Heisenjurg]

Play the ecological angle - aircon is incredibly bad for the planet, and frankly absolutely not needed in the UK!

[diddl]

@sallagadoola

I think on gofundme you can raise money for whatever you like!

Yes- I suppose I was thinking that this sponsored stuff makes it seem more like doing it for charity.