To not do the at home camp for beavers

[Fragglerock10]

The nice bit of me is thinking I am being a complete grump but I feel so stressed
On top of school work for our 6 year old we also have activities to do from youth group, drama and beavers.
Drama want us to do mini films and put them on their website and they are giving out certificates. youth group want us to film us doing various activities. Beavers want us to complete badges, a few weeks ago we did a at home campfire on zoom.

Today beavers want us to do an at home camp. Except our tent is too big for our garden so they want us to make one out of sheets in our front room. They want us to zoom with the pack leader and others for a few hours singing songs and doing activities etc. Then we are supposed to all sleep in make shift tent.
It want to shout “enough”. In between us both working full time, home schooling plus normal parenting trying to fit in everything else. I am knackered after a week of night shifts, DH is knackered after working from home and looking after DS most of the time. I just don’t have the bloody energy. DS won’t sleep well downstairs

The final straw is Tic-tac putting a post on social media saying we need all the beavers taking part and not to be lazy

[concernedforthefuture]

Yeah we didn't take part in virtual Cub camp last weekend. It was a full zoom schedule of crafting / stuff for almost all of Sat and Sun. For safeguarding reasons, a parent had to be on screen with their Cub at all times. Fuck that! DH and I are still working out of the home (not at the same time) so weekends are just that for us. I did not want to spend c. 10 precious hours staring at 30 Cubs tying knots and singing Ging Gang Goolie on my iPad.

[Emmapeeler1]

I haven't done the camp thing either. And my son hasn't attended the two zoom meetings so far because he hasn't wanted to. I got as far as copying and pasting the badge requirements and that's it.

Quite honestly, it'll be all I can muster to find his necker on time for the zoom (and remember to do it) let alone put a tent up.

That said I do think it's lovely that some leaders are putting stuff on for kids. But equally they should feel under no pressure to as they will also be trying to juggle home schooling and work, elderly relatives on their own etc.

[Piixxiiee]

Oh we're the same both working full time at home or a few days in school and no we are not doing Beavers camp.... my 4 year old will want to join in and then basically we'll all have a shit nights sleep in the living room whilst the beds are empty.... nope.

[Emmapeeler1]

I did not want to spend c. 10 precious hours staring at 30 Cubs tying knots and singing Ging Gang Goolie on my iPad.

And that too

[Pacmanitee]

Can't you just say no? Choose the stuff that you think your children will enjoy and don't tell them about the rest? What would happen if you don't do it? . To the posters on about furloughed parents having a wonderful time, sure, nothing like having no idea if you'll have a job in x weeks or months time to relax you.

[myself2020]

@pacmaniteein case you were referring to me - i didn’t say parents on furlough have a wonderful time. i said they have loads of time (especially with no schoolwork asked for either). The are probably stressed out of their mind (many will
loose their jobs), but they do have time

[Starlightstarbright1]

The one thing about lockdown is it’s time to choose.

If you don’t want to say no - I am working full time from home with my ds .

I have still found more time for him than running round taking places but he really misses people - his scouts group have done nothing - though his scout leader is a critical worker - working long hours.

He would really enjoy a zoom meeting - however I am also happy to say no that doesn’t work for us. .

I wouldn’t camp because I hate camping - I have happily paid whatever is requested to send him.

[Bakedpotatoandgin]

Please don't worry about it! Our Beaver group is putting up various challenges and badges, as well as the odd zoom call (once a fortnight and only about half an hour) because the kids get excited to see their friends and the leaders (in some cases, we are important trusted adults with whom they've formed a bond on camp etc, and if they struggle at school they like having a non-family adult apart from their teachers to interact with) , but there is absolutely no obligation to join in anything, and we wouldn't want to put pressure on parents.
On our side, we get regular emails from hq encouraging us to deliver online Scouting, so apart from wanting to, we do feel some obligation to provide something for those that would like it. That doesn't mean you need to participate in everything if it's too much, the last thing we want to do is make people's lives harder

[HeadSpin5]

@Bakedpotatoandgin that’s a lovely post, thank you. 😊

[FurloughedFedUp]

"Some bright spark of a parent (on furlough no doubt) came up with the idea"

Please stop suggesting that all parents on furlough are skipping through the daisies with time on their hands to do crafts, bake scones and find creative ways to keep their children occupied because we obviously don't have any other way of filling our days.

Many of us are counting every penny, worrying every day about our jobs, juggling 'home school', housework, shopping, supporting elderly family members and are equally stressed but in different ways.

I don't need the digs at furloughed parents thanks.

[TheRoyallingStones]

YANBU

I was going to say that I’m sure the leaders wouldn’t want you to feel bad about what is supposed to be a fun extra activity... then I read the bit about them chivving people to join in!

I’m a Guide leader and for quite a while we didn’t do anything. Leaders all still working full time and struggling to adapt to lockdown like everyone else. Eventually we set up weekly zoom meetings but have emphasised from the beginning that they’re there if the girls want to join, and of course it would be nice to see lots of them. But also that we know everyone is juggling lots of things and they’re totally optional. And that’s a 40 minute a week meeting that requires minimal parental involvement (just to get them set up in the meeting).

The Brownies that feed in to us set out an activity pack at the start of lockdown, don’t think they’ve done much since as again leaders have their own pressures.

Your sons pack seem to be putting unnecessary pressure on, and it’s not fair of them. It’s fantastic that they’re offering so much, I’m sure for some families it’s brilliant to keep the kids (and adults) occupied. But it shouldn’t be causing additional stress at a time when many of us are already under lots of stress and struggling.

Do the school stuff as best you can, but not at the expense of family time and your child’s wellbeing, he’s 6, his peers are in the same impossible situation, he’ll be fine. And drop the extra curricular stuff, it’s not worth the agro.

[BikeRunSki]

^ The lucky people who don’t work full time or that are furloughed are having a lovely time.

The rest of us full time working parents are blooming shattered, and super annoyed at the lovely ideas that others have to occupy themselves. Don’t tell your son what’s going on and just delete the emails. Your son is 6, the boys won’t be talking about it when they return to Beavers in September.^

This. And I say that as a Cub leader. I’m working full time at home, so is DH and we have 2 primary school age children. I’m getting aggro from parents for not doing enough for Cubs. I’ve managed about 2 Zoom meetings in total.

[Emmapeeler1]

Lovely post @Bakedpotatoandgin

to furloughed parents. It must be pretty shit and stressful.

[BiddyPop]

My Cub pack are meeting on zoom lost weeks since Easter (but hot this weekend for the bank holiday - leaders need a break too), was he other Cub pack in the group is doing activities via email.

But I know that while the majority have been meeting on a
Zoom, not all can so I’m sending them the resources weekly as well.

And there is no pressure on ANY Cub to appear or otherwise participate at the moment - there’s too much going on at home, different versions of school at a distance (there are at least 6 schools!), and other groups. Hell, even the other Cub pack in the group is doing different stuff (they are the proper “scouting” Cub pack normally so we always feel inadequate).

NO leader shouLd be putting pressure to do activities. Covid or regular times.

[blubellsarebells]

Dont do anything you dont want to do.
No long explanations needed, it doesn't suit your family right now so you dont do it.

[BiddyPop]

Sorry wine taken - Cubs NOT meeting this weekend. I’m lifting a mast in place on a boat instead (for older scouts - I know, I’m daft...).

[Wannabegreenfingers]

My daughter has done this with Brownies and has had the best time, but no one is forcing you. She slept under the kitchen table in her 'den', no tent required.

[TokyoSushi]

Gosh no, I don't understand all these people who think we have nothing to do!

I don't want something 'to keep the kids occupied' we're absolutely fine, thank you!

[Bananarama101]

Had a similar thing with DS and cubs. Have just muted the WhatsApp group, and a quick check reveals there are currently 307 unread messages in there. Frankly I have enough shit to deal with without that too right now. Just give yourself a bit of break and focus on what you can give your time/energy to.

[MagicKingdomDizzy]

YANBU OP.

My sons pack are doing a MONTH LONG camp at home.

No fucking way I'm not doing it.

Don't feel like you have to do anything!

[ChilliCheese123]

I’d just skip it. You don’t have to explain anything. Just say you won’t be able to take part. Just pick and choose what you want to join in with, be polite when turning activities down and keep it fun

[Samtsirch]

Oneofthose
That’s the end of that conversation then......

[BackforGood]

It's interesting. I read this thread earlier this evening, and then later, checked in on Facebook.
I'm a District Scouter, and, as such, have the privilege of being a member of quite a few closed Facebook Groups for different Scout Groups.
Tonight - just coincidentally - I've seen an outpouring of love for the Leaders of one Group, who have been offering a mix of badgework; fun sessions on zoom; some fun challenges (nothing to do with badges, just 'have a go at this if you'd like to'); and, indeed have done two virtual camps. It seems the Leaders must have delivered or posted badges to Cubs homes today. The parents posting have been really appreciative.

In checking in across the District, there is a real mix of ways people are interacting with their young people, and a mix of responses. Nobody has got full engagement. Generally it is around 1/2 I'd say. That is absolutely fine. Nobody is under any pressure to join in if they want to. What we are trying to ensure is that all children and young people have the opportunity to do something, even if their section Leaders aren't able to offer anything. I have been overwhelmed at some of the brilliant things some Section Leaders have been able to do, but there is no expectation that all Leaders are able to do anything, and certainly no expectation that any child has to join in what is offered.
Leaders are putting ideas out there, and it is up to the families if they give their children chance to join in or not.

[olympicsrock]

Our cub pack are doing zoom meetings , challenges etc many of these involve uploading evidence for badges etc. My 8 year old is doing teams meetings with about 5 hours of screen based lessons per day and all the IT admin this entails.
Neither he nor we have the headspace first this at the moment . We have ducked out.
However I know that his cub friends at another school are left to their own devices with only 15 mins zoom per week . They are glad to have this interaction.
Our leaders have been supportive of each family.

[myself2020]

This is really interesting reading.
my son has really gone off beavers over the last 2 months. the zoom meetings start with20 minutes of everybody describing the amazing things they have done with their parents the last week, and showing what they’ve done for badges.
Well, my son has been doing schoolwork, and we have been working. Local primary schoolwhich all but 1 other boy and my son go to has set absolutely no work (“treat this as a holiday”), and a lot of parents on furlough (and no doubt stressed and scared). but it makes the meetings basically a competition in who’s done most.
I haven’t seen the other boy who doesn’t go to the local school in the last meeting, I think we are going to leave as well. Its just too depressing (not the schools fault, I’m glad ours continues with the curriculum!).