To wish we could stop over complicating Christmas

[Beswitched]

Ever more elaborate decorations, Christmas boxes, expensive branded advent calendars, fancy alternatives to the standard Christmas Dinner, competitive posts on Facebook, manic manic shopping, trips to lapland, Secret Santa angst etc etc and the whole shebang starting in November.

Aibu to wonder what happened to a couple of presents from Santa, simple presents for family and friends, putting the beloved and tattered decorations up a few days before Christmas and enjoying a roast dinner together?
It all seems to have become so elaborate these days.

[AgentCooper]

I came here to post pretty much this exact thread. Glad other folk are feeling it.

What I’m finding tough now that I have 2 year old DS is all that everything suddenly becomes noisy and busy and he hates that. Toddler group has had Christmas music blasting for the past three weeks. And there are going to be so many family gatherings with loads of people so it’s likely I’ll be off in a quiet room with DS for most of the time.

And I know I sound so ungrateful but all the presents. He doesn’t need all this stuff. And then you try to get stuff of equal value for other people’s kids and end up skint as fuck. Call me grinchy but I don’t think it’s necessary to spend 50 quid on a toddler.

[Readthisearlier]

I wonder why it's so hard to understand that people do things because they want to, or enjoy it?

A Christmas Eve Box isn't a new thing. I have my grandmother's from when she was a child in the 20s. It's almost 100 years old. Not sure what's so overindulgent about a new pair of PJs and a book.

We did Elf on the Shelf for ten years. We enjoyed doing it and have some lovely memories. No one is holding you down and making you do it.

It says a lot about you as a person though, if you're slating other people for doing things they and their children enjoy. Just get on with your own Christmas. What others do in their own home has absolutely no bearing on what you do

[GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER]

Plenty of people still do it the 'old' way.

All the talk of 'pressure' really irritates me. Nobody is forcing anybody to go mad with huge piles of presents for kids, new decorations every year, elves, Christmas Eve boxes, far too much food that only gets thrown away, etc.
For those who enjoy all that, fine, but you can have a lovely Christmas without.

[dottypotter]

Your own birthday I mean.

[dottypotter]

There is no proof that a baby jesus was even born its all hearsay! A load of fuss over something that has never even be proved that it happened. How many people who celebrate are religous anyway.

Now birthdays that different.

[NeedAnExpert]

Watching my 5th nativity of the week earlier. May write the school a pagan musical for next year to set the record straight. It’s pure religious propaganda this year.

[NeedAnExpert]

He describes how in converting the Saxons, the church decided to rebrand their midwinter festival of the slaughter of the beasts, as a celebration of the birth of Christ. Voila, Christmas!

They slaughtered hundreds of thousands of pagans who refused to convert to Christianity too, whilst stealing the winter solstice/Yule/saturnalia practices. How very festive.

[Poplarhawk]

Fluffyside is correct, Cherry. Read up about it.

[thefluffysideofgrey]

@CherryPavlova

Call it what you want, it's still largely pagan.

It's not even Jesus's actual birthday.

The most important Christian festival is Easter. Seriously, it really is.

Anyway, if you get bored go and read Bede. He describes how in converting the Saxons, the church decided to rebrand their midwinter festival of the slaughter of the beasts, as a celebration of the birth of Christ. Voila, Christmas!

[CherryPavlova]

thefluffysideofgrey I rather think the two and a half billion Christians might disagree. There may have been a pagan festival in the U.K. that predates Christianity but Christmas is a global Christian festival. It is not grafted on. It stands alone as the penultimate Christian feast.

It’s kind of in the name - from the Greek Khrīstos meaning Messiah. Although it wasn’t known as Christmas until about the 11th century. Early Christians didn’t celebrate birthdays as they were considered pagan but the feast was a celebration of the nativity, rather than the birth of Christ. It has evolved from the Feast of the Nativity rather than from the Pagan - although early Christians would undoubtedly continued some widespread Pagan practices such a short decorating with greenery.
I sometimes eat meals without meat- that doesn’t make me a vegetarian.....

[dottypotter]

and we used to put the Christmas decorations up literally the Sunday before. Nowadays, it starts earlier and earlier and has literally sucked the joy out of what used to be a special time.

My oh parents would put the decs up Xmas eve and then when you came down in the morning it was Christmas. Brilliant.

[thefluffysideofgrey]

It's not a Christian festival.

It's a pagan one with some Christian bits grafted on.

It was always a festival of indulgence- eating up what couldn't be stored or fed through the Winter.

It's not even indulgence anymore though- just satisfying advertising-driven anxiety. Vile.

[Redwinestillfine]

Only elaborate if you make it so (no elf on the shelf in this house...kids did briefly ask, I had a little rant about pointless tat, and they moved on, no great drama).

[dottypotter]

Forgot Xmas trees up in November.

[dottypotter]

its dreadful wish people wouldnt buy into.

we all need Xmas pyjamas
A christmas Eve box
An expensive advent calendar
we need a new sofa in Time for Xmas
We need our hair done for Christmas.
We need a Xmas jumper and an Xmas jumper day.

Its too commercial and it comes round too often too. Should be every 4 years like the Olympics.

[ralfeesmum]

I've long since stopped being religious but I do seriously wonder just where does the birth of Christ fit into all this? Because it doesn't seem to.........in fact he's relegated to a glittery Xmas card with Three Shift Wise men lurking about in a stable.

[pourmeanotherglass]

Agreed- happy to simplify so long as no-one makes me eat turkey and Brussels sprouts.

[CherryPavlova]

I think you can do fairly simple but big and fun.

You can have a simple Christmas Eve supper with neighbours and friends but offer simple food - we do every year. It’s no harder or more complex cooking for twenty as for six.

What I don’t do is buy or use lots of new commercial tat - inflatable snowmen, a house with so many lights a plane mistakes it for a runway, ever more expensive advent calendars etc. Ours have been reused each year since the children were young.

I do think at Christmas having some level of faith helps. It’s a Christian festival so being broadly Christian does give a focus and reduces need to artificially create fun and excitement. Our children grew up excited by putting the crib set out, Carol services, nativities etc. No elf necessary. They knew on Christmas morning we went to friends for drinks after Mass. They enjoyed - and still enjoy- getting house ready for Christmas Eve village supper and making canapés for Boxing Day drinks.
The traditions continue still. They are embedded in the cycle of village life, so no great fuss but lovely nevertheless.

[BackBoiler]

@Grumpbum123 I am exactly the same this year! No lights outside, just the tree and the fireplace trimmed up (for the kids).

I'm going to save myself for the actual day! Nice food and playing games/watching films with my family! That's it. I cannot think beyond today if I'm perfectly honest.

[Petlover9]

@PBo83 - I agree with all that you say. Does anyone know what Save The Children actually do? It seems to be run like a company and I have never seen anything in the papers where children are actually helped - think of those in Lincs. where the floods were, did they get helped I wonder? Charity CEO’s are usually paid more than the Prime minister

[Chocpear]

Although I do agree to an extent, I also remember my Nan making similar complaints 40 years ago!

[AwdBovril]

YANBU at all, OP. We usually put the tree up at the end of term, or the weekend before if term finishes really close to Christmas eve. DH & I just get each other a couple of smallish gifts, usually practical things or alcohol that we'd not ordinarily be able to justify buying ourselves. He's getting a new kitchen apron & a nice bottle of whisky. DD's main presents this year will be a new (second hand from ebay) bike, & a massive blanket for her bed that I'm still trying to finish knitting... only about another 15 inches to go... shitshitshit & buggeration...

We do a Christmas eve box but it literally has some new pyjamas, a mince pie, a book (we always buy books as she's a big reader) & some bed socks in it. And we re-use the same box every year, it's pretty small. I saw some enormous Christmas eve boxes in a shop recently, I was just baffled as I'm sure I would run out of ideas of what to put in it!

[PumpkinPie2016]

A lot of people do seem to do a huge amount for Christmas which is of course, entirely their choice.

I think a lot of people also do a 'simpler' Christmas.

We have the tree we bought when we moved into our house 10 years ago. Decorations have been added to over the years - usually one or two per year from a shop in the Lake district.

Our son has a simple chocolate advent calendar but we don't do elf on the shelf, Dec 1st box or Christmas eve box.

He does a nativity at school plus goes to the village panto. We go to the school Christmas fair because everything raised goes back to the school.

We go to visit Santa at the local garden centre.

We are lucky that we get 2 weeks off for Christmas and that is spent relaxing at home, playing with DS with his new toys, seeing close family and friends (all local) and watching films etc. We have Christmas dinner either at ours or a relatives and we buy a few treats (mainly cheese!). Other than Christmas day, it's largely normal food for us as that's what we prefer.

We buy presents for family but no one goes overboard.

No stress involved here - just a nice family time.

[MsAwesomeDragon]

We do your simple Christmas. We have a chocolate advent calendar, visit family Christmas Eve and boxing Day but stay at home just us on Christmas Day. We have an artificial tree that we reuse every year. I did replace it last year but the previous one had been my grandma's, and had been in use every year for over 30 years (I inherited it when I moved into my first independent house) and it is looking rather thread bare now. We buy presents for extended family, but it's simple things like socks, nothing big, everything consumable/useable. Our Christmas dinner is just the bits we like as a family, so chicken instead of turkey, roast potatoes, millions of yorkshires, no fancy stuff that's extra hassle without extra taste.