To ask how much you'd pay?

[InnisandGunn]

Sorry, not AIBU, but not much traffic on wedding forum.

We've asked DS's key person in nursery to come sit at home with him after we've put him to bed the night of our wedding.

What is reasonable to pay? She's a lovely lady and I don't want to take the mick, and know people pay a lot for this service when hiring babysitters etc. We can afford to pay more but don't know what's ludicrous or stingy I guess.

Thanks!

[BackforGood]

You are forgetting, this woman has a full time job, this is basically overtime, at night, taking time out of her family life. A lot of people are paid time and a half or double time for overtime.


It's not the same as your work saying you have to come in on a Saturday / evening though.
This is an opportunity -if she wants it - there is no obligation - to be paid to loll about on someone else's sofa. If she doesn't (wants to go out or prefers to be with her family or her mates) then she will say no anyway. She will only take it is she is available and then in all likelihood she won't actually have to do anything.

Up to you OP, if you are considering it part of your wedding costs and have that sort of money to spare, but I really don't think she will be expecting anymore than £50.

[InnisandGunn]

Thanks for all the advice guys

[InnisandGunn]

I'm thinking of offering around £150, regardless of how long we're there and get some nice bits in and offer a takeaway. I just think it'll be so reassuring knowing that there's someone there he knows and trusts, and is already used to going to for comfort when I'm not around. And like you say it's time our of her week, on her Saturday night.

[Thestrangestthing]

Lindy2

You are forgetting, this woman has a full time job, this is basically overtime, at night, taking time out of her family life. A lot of people are paid time and a half or double time for overtime.

[Lindy2]

She'll know the going rate for your area I'm sure.

I'm amazed at people saying £15 per hour. People don't even pay anything like that much for daytime nursery or childminding, which involves a lot more work than babysitting does.

The hours you want are pretty standard babysitting hours. Hopefully for most of the time your DS will be asleep.

I'm sure the offer of a takeaway or some nice nibbles left out would be much appreciated OP.

[InnisandGunn]

Hours would probably be 6-1am maybe?

[SometimesMaybe]

Ask her! They will all have a rate they charge. So when you are texting to set up times etc just say “what’s your rate” and pay her a bit on top to move up,the babysitting rankings ;)

[InnisandGunn]

No we'll be back once the nights over, or his nan will come back earlier and we'll take over as have older DSS too so can't be getting too messy. He's sleeping through, for now, so should just be a case of sitting at ours once we've put him to bed. Would offering to pay for takeaway be a good idea too?

[Celebelly]

I pay £12 a pop for someone to take my dog out for an hour so I'd pay at least that to look after my child on such an important occasion I think! Especially as it will be a lot nicer for your DS it being someone he knows so well. I think £15 per hour that's been mentioned on here is probably around right.

[InnisandGunn]

Umm, see I was expecting something like £200. It's more knowing someone is there that he knows if he were to wake up. Which is invaluable when I want to let my hair down and have a good time. I may ask her directly, that's probably the most sensible thing to do. I just don't want her asking for less to be kind then thinking why am I doing this.

[Lindy2]

I do some evening babysitting.

I charge £8 per hour before midnight and £12 per hour after midnight.

Is it normal babysitting you need or will she be doing full overnight care so there until the morning? If it's overnight care you might need to pay a bit more to cover getting him up, dressed, doing breakfast etc.

[Notthetoothfairy]

Just ask, I’m sure this isn’t the first time she has babysat so would have a rate.

[BackforGood]

Wow, there are some flush people on this thread.

My dd would do that for £5 an hour.
It's sitting on someone's sofa folks!

You will be talking about - what, 5? 6? hours ?
Even if you want to match her pay, you are probably talking around £8 ph, so that is £40 - £48 for the evening. She will be doing a lot less than what she does at Nursery though, where she will be responsible for occupying and entertaining between 3 and 8 dc at once - WHILE THEY ARE AWAKE

[vincettenoir]

You can afford to pay more than what? I think £10 an hour is usual going rate.

[slightlydomesticated]

Could you ask the manager at your sons nursery, or the key worker that would be babysitting him? At my child's old nursery a lot of the key workers babysat for all the parents, and they all agreed to charge the same amount per hour. If you don't feel comfortable asking the key worker could you ask another parent that has used them before?

[ElluesPichulobu]

£10 ph would be absolute minimum for ordinary babysitting.

the evening of your wedding, the babysitting being reliable and competent whatever happens is absolutely vital so I would offer more like £15 ph due to the importance of the occasion

[rattusrattus20]

ask another parent at the nursery what the 'done thing' at that workplace is [hiring nursery staff for babysitting is super-common], this is more important than the fact this is a wedding.

[NoIDontWatchLoveIsland]

Sorry what makes this different to normal babysitting - do you need particularly late hours/the full night or something?

[TrixieFranklin]

I also took her round a big slice of wedding cake the next day. She managed to get them to sleep in their own beds during a very frustrating stage of them refusing to sleep anywhere except my bed and they've been good as gold since (12 months+) so she deserved it

[TrixieFranklin]

Our nursery key worker had our 2 from about 3 until 10 and we paid £100

[Andysbestadventure]

I echo £10ph in the North West. But I always give £12 as I feel tight otherwise.

[Sexnotgender]

I’d say £15 an hour.

[Thestrangestthing]

I did 8 hours babysitting though.

[glasshalfsomething]

We pay £10ph in the North West.

[Thestrangestthing]

I'm a childminder and did this for someone for 2 kids. They paid me £100. Very generous of them.