To think he's a bit of a prick really

[OlivesAreGod]

H just threw a massive strop because he doesn't have any clean work clothes. It's a sore subject in our house because I feel like I do EVERYTHING in the house as it is. I cook, clean, wash up, tidy, do laundry etc etc... He works a few more hours than me so thinks it gives him an excuse to do fuck all.

I've started to leave his clothes piling up at the side of the bed and saying I won't wash them unless he actually brings them to the washing basket (this is a grown adult man).

Over the weekend, I'd done a wash and the clothes have been drying on the maiden. I put some of his work clothes in this morning but haven't actually pressed the button because I was waiting for the other clothes to dry.

He's gone mental, throwing clothes about the kitchen screaming that I have so much more spare time and how the fuck would I like going to work in dirty clothes. I've screamed back saying I'd clean my own fucking clothes because I'm not a child who needs mummy to do it for them!

I've said why the fuck would he not just come home and put a wash on himself if it's bothered him so much. Apparently he's been making comments for days about how he has no clean clothes so I should know. Like yeah... I do know... But you're capable of washing them yourself?!

I probably could do more to make the house more organised but fucking hell, I work full time as well and well... I'm not his pissing slave?!

I'm absolutely raging. What a cunt!

[Glasscrab]

I could not accommodate the penis of a man who behaved like this.

Indeed. Or who didn't have the brainpower to figure out the washing machine or how to cook.

[Sallyseagull]

I blame his mum (semi joking ). My DH used to do sweet FA because his mum did everything for him and his dad when he was at home so he expected the same, regardless of if I had the time or not.

Dont back down. Let this be the first of probably many lessons for him.

[Tellmetruth4]

I will work very hard to convince my DD to end any relationship she has with a man who hasn’t been housebroken.

Out of all of my friends, the ones who have DHs who can’t/won’t do any domestic stuff are the unhappiest. They look worn down. I want my DD to have higher expectations of her partners. It may not seem too bad to do everything when it’s just the two of you but when you throw kids into the mix you suddenly realise you have an extra child to drudge for.

There’s a guy I work with, mid twenties. He still lives with his parents. His mum does all domestic work for his dad plus him and his sister. This includes all cleaning, cooking, washing, ironing, putting away clothes and making packed lunches for them for work. He laughed when saying he doesn’t even know how to iron! Which parent would want this man for a son in law?! He would make your daughters life miserable.

[Tellmetruth4]

I bet he manages to be able to use an iPhone properly so why can’t he understand washing machine instructions? I’m fuming on your behalf.

[katseyes7]

l've just remembered something l forgot when l posted previously.
When l was in hospital with a broken ankle, post-surgery, off my face on morphine, he turned up at visiting time demanding to know "how to work the washing machine." l told him to wait til l got home. No idea why l did that. Must have been the drugs.
Months later, l got a phone call at work (l worked shifts, he didn't) wanting to know where the "instruction book for the iron" was. Apparently l had committed the cardinal sin of putting one of his work shirts away unironed. He actually thought the 'instruction book' gave you details of how to actually iron the shirt.
When we were splitting up, l taught him how to do it, and l bought him a (cheap) steam iron. And l made sure l got the very expensive cordless one. l reckoned that was fair reward for the years of crap l put up with.

[KurriKurri]

He screams and throws clothes round the kitchen ? - Do you really want to live with someone like that for the rest of your life ? (I wouldn;t want to live with it for a day)
I often wonder what some of these awful men people post about on here actually bring to the relationship. He sounds horrible, really foul.

[Aprillygirl]

If my partner started screaming at me for not being a good enough servant (because that's what you are) I would pack his bags for him so fast, dirty clothes and all, the pisstaking twat would not know what hit him, and that would be the last thing I ever did for the chauvinistic pig. Why do you put up with that shit OP?

[romany4]

Men like this infuriate me. Lazy shit.

I hope you don't back down. Make him do his own washing from now on

[Likethebattle]

Dunce he gets up earlier can he not stick the washer on before he goes out then you hang it up before you leave? Division based on you work times. I assume he gets home earlier, does he cook a meal for you both?

[ShirleyPhallus]

Good for you for standing up for yourself OP

[teenagetantrums]

I'd never do his washing again. I do all the washing here, but we are both grown up enough to put our dirty clothes in washing basket so it's no problem. We have no children left at home and work similar hours and l like doing the washing easiet household chore. Press a button then sit down and do nothing. But no way on earth would l do it all if l was spoken to like that.

[RedWoollyHat]

Entitled shit head. What would he do if he lived alone? Reminds me of this:

[Strugglingtodomybest]

YANBU, he's a prick.

My DH lived at home when I met him. His mum did everything for him. Never once has he assumed that housework etc is my job. He's learnt to do it himself, and let's face it, you don't need to be brain of Britain to learn how to switch on a washing machine. Admittedly, he's a bit of a slob, but he tidies and cleans to his standards and I do it to mine. It tends to work out ok.

[Queenioqueenio]

Keep standing your ground over this OP!
My teen boys have managed to learn this lesson - your DH can too.

[Shoxfordian]

He's treating you like his housekeeper
If this is indicative of how he usually is then you really need to consider if you want to put up with it...

[Greyhound22]

No way would I put up with it.

I'm actually off today with DS but DH asked me this morning as he went to work at 6am if I got a minute could I wash some pants for him as he was running out. He isn't perfect by a long shot but good grief he wouldn't dream of shouting at me because his clothes aren't clean?

You honestly need words. DS4 can put the machine on.

[Grambler]

DH once complained/commented on something of his that I had or hadn't ironed.

I've never touched his ironing since.

He's occasionally mentioned in passing that "we" need to add something to the shopping list. Obviously he's just as capable as me of writing it down or even logging on and putting it in the electronic basket - so if he thinks "we" need something, he adds it or it doesn't get bought. I'm not his slave.

[Tonnerre]

Something tells me that if your situations were reversed and he was the one with more time at home, he wouldn't be volunteering to do your washing.

[Cassilis]

I have never washed or ironed my husband’s clothes throughout our marriage and he has never expected me to.

You need to stop OP. Seriously stop.

[cees]

What an entitled shit he is. Do not back down, demand more from him, he is well able help keep his home running and clean. Give him more of the same until he starts pulling his weight.

[KT2019]

Was he house trained when you got together?

I think you need to sort a rota or task list with him so the division of all household tasks are fair. I tend to do most of the washings in our house, but DP prefers to (and is better at) deep clean the bathroom /doing dishes so we play to strengths and to me it feels equitable.

If he needs something in particular washed, he'll happily stick on a load though and wouldn't expect me to do it, unless I was already mid-loading. He's also perfectly capable of putting his worn clothes in a washing basket, no excuses for that at all.

He's by no means perfect but I do think it helps that he lived alone and actually lived like an adult before me, and I've worked to keep that up ever since and not take over, even when he does things a bit backwards such as dusting after doing the floors . Did he always have his mum doing things for him prior to living with you, or is it more recently he's started taking you for granted?

[Likethebattle]

We both just do a washing when it’s needed. DH will grab a load and put it in the machine, he does sometimes ask what program to use as he doesn’t want to ruin any of my clothes. He’s an adult and performs like one .

[justbeingadad]

Wow. My wife was a SAHM and I never expected her to wash my clothes. She did sometimes, but was always my responsibility that I had clean clothes for work!

Maybe the other end of the scale but you're definitely not unreasonable!

[Ispywithmycynicaleye]

My DP started that shit with me, asking if he has a clean shirt/ polo / t-shirt.. I started putting it back on him saying "dunno, did you wash one? Bring one downstairs? Theres no darks in the basket so you must've left it in the room".

I also started asking him if I have a clean top, or if he knows where my cream jumper is