AIBU to be a shocked at a parent leaving their 4 month old home alone for 10 minutes

[NotMyUsualNameNoSiree]

I overheard a conversation at school the other day, a mum was telling another mum how she left her young DD (4mo) at home while she picked up her DS (aged 5 or 6) from school.

I believe she lives around the corner and across the road from school, maybe 1 or 2 minutes walk. But pick-up would probably take 10 minutes in total to get the kid, get him ready, leave school premises and get home.

Of course I rationally know that no harm is likely to come to a 4mo left alone for ten minutes. But even if it's very very unlikely that anything bad would happen (to the baby, or the mum, or the older kid), it still gives me the chills to think about it.

Instinctively I want to say something, whether to her or the school. But I don't know if I'm being over cautious.

[Dorsetdays]

And think that sums it up really

[Dorsetdays]

Vbd. Excellent link, summing up earlier pints about this being a very perceived risk and centred around social norms, not actual risk or fact

[Dorsetdays]

Lad. I haven’t insulted hercule at all and, once again, I don’t have any argument.

For the last time, I don’t care what your option is yet you seem to care very much about mine.

[Ginlinessisnexttogodliness]

I don’t think @herculepoirot2 especially cares what any of you think or her or what you think @Dorsetdays
But I am happy to be corrected!

[herculepoirot2]

Advising them to find those out first would have been much better advice than racing off to SS.

Only if, on some level, a 4 month old baby being left entirely alone is acceptable to you. It isn’t to me.

[LadAlive]

Dorset you've done your fair share of deliberate obfuscation and lapped up the rabid support of green you have flip=flopped from insulting hercule to being reasonable.
None of your arguments are reasonable.
None.
It is not OK to leave a baby home alone, you know what this means, not in the garden, in the shower etc.etc. HOME ALONE.
You are not only in the minority, you are wrong.
Yes I would report you if you left a baby home alone and yes, SS would have to act, Section 42, they would ask questions.

[vdbfamily]

Before the thread ends I wanted to share this piece of research which is very salient. Please do not comment on it unless you have read it.

www.npr.org/sections/13.7/2016/08/22/490847797/why-do-we-judge-parents-for-putting-kids-at-perceived-but-unreal-risk?t=1560280710407

[Dorsetdays]

I don’t have an argument, still not getting that are you? You do because you’re the one trying to prove you’re right.

I don’t care either way what you would or wouldn’t do. I only care about the decision I make for my family, not yours. Yet you seem to care very much about me.

Just stop judging everyone around you until you know all the facts. The origins of this thread started with a half overheard playground conversation where even the OP wasn’t totally sure of the facts.

Advising them to find those out first would have been much better advice than racing off to SS.

[herculepoirot2]

I suppose it’s the same compulsion one feels to watch a building falling down. Except the building is your argument.

[Dorsetdays]

Lad. Going off to do something else, like work etc isn’t ‘flouncing’ off a thread, it’s simply having something else to do other than MN

Announcing you’ve ‘had enough’ and you’re leaving, you have nothing left to say etc etc IS flouncing off.

Hercule has done that 7 or 8 times so far, yet somehow cant manage to stay away.

[Dorsetdays]

Post of the thread goes to hercule “I don’t care what you think”.

40 pages of you trying to tell us what we should think, telling us how we should think and how very wrong we are to think the way we do, VERY much says the opposite.

You clearly care deeply about what we think which is why you’re trying so very hard to change our minds to think they way you do.

I’m genuinely not interested in how you parent and yet you seem very invested in how I do it. 🤔

[LadAlive]

No! stay.
I want to tell you how much of a twat you've been.
Oh, I think I did.
You've flounced a couple of times too, you fucking hypocrite.

[herculepoirot2]

greenrockstar

It’s a fact, green. If you leave your child unsupervised and something awful happens to them, you are responsible. That’s why most people wouldn’t dream of it.

[greenrockstar]

Anyway off again now! Things to do .....

[greenrockstar]

I stand by it was a vile comment to make, it was!

[LadAlive]

I really think you will find that wasn’t my comment. I simply pointed out that it was misinterpreted, which it was.
Indeed.
It was you @greenrockstar who attacked that mother as she tried to describe but regretted her bluntness.
You latched on and away you went.

[herculepoirot2]

greenrockstar

I really think you will find that wasn’t my comment. I simply pointed out that it was misinterpreted, which it was.

[greenrockstar]

@LadAlive that was not said by me it was @herculepoirot2 and someone else, who asked for it to be deleted. I told them they were vile, so don't you ducking dare blame that on me. I think @herculepoirot2 s post was would it be convenient for the absent parent to find a baby dead

I'm sorry you suffered but I DID NOT SAY
THAT AT ALL!

Lay the blame elsewhere.

As for goady a poster posting on average every 15 mins for 12 hours is fucking goady.

[LadAlive]

I've followed and read the whole thread green you have been the obnoxious goady poster throughout. Your 'dead baby' digs against a mother who had herself endured a SID and who deleted gher own post, was/is especially twatty.

[greenrockstar]

@LadAlive I think you'll find @herculepoirot2 is the prolific poster in this as I've pointed out already.

[LadAlive]

Nobody is talking about you being in the garden painting your fucking fence.
You know this, you've known it for page after fucking page.

[herculepoirot2]

greenrockstar

I don’t care what you think.

[greenrockstar]

@LadAlive it was .... but thanks for your useless input. See my post above as to why I painted whilst my children were safely in bed.... risk assessment.

[greenrockstar]

So fucking what? My child and I have eaten three meals at the table together, been out in the rain for a two hour nature walk, played, read together, gone to soft play, done bath time and story time. At no point was my child left alone with the cat.


I don't think so, when the fuck did you have time for a two hour walk in the rain?

You're acting like people are saying go out for the night they spoke about 10 mins. Exaggerating the situation is not helpful. The whole point was it was 10 mins, that's why the person risk assessed. For me it was 15 mins and I risk assessed. I preferred to paint whilst they were asleep for safety, speed and to be able to devote my time to them when they were awake. NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT!

[LadAlive]

I asked because I was trying to discover if you had them during a time it was OK a blind eye was turned to leaving babies alone, turns out you're not my great-grandmother, so, no...it wasn't OK then either.