To not be saving child benefit

[cadburyegg]

So we have 2 DC, one 3yo the other 4mo. We claim child benefit for them. It goes into our joint account and helps a little with our daily expenses. I have worked part time since the 3yo was born so it’s helpful.

In laws came over last night and somehow this topic came up. MIL was aghast that we are not saving it up for the children when they are older. We do save for them but only a small amount per month. Her words were “you’re not poor so you should be saving it up for their first car or similar”. Well no we aren’t poor but we aren’t rich.

I thought child benefit was supposed to help with the cost of raising kids not be a saving fund for them? AIBU??

[Somersetter]

So some people are being criticized for spending it and others are being criticized for saving it

I think it's totally fine for each family to make their own spending/saving decisions. If you want to ringfence child benefit and use (or save) it solely for your children, fine. If it just goes into the family pot along with everything else, fine. If you use it to pay for an unexpected bill or even a treat for yourself, also fine! As long as your child's needs are being met it really doesn't matter.

[PattiStanger]

I agree with purpletigerlove.

You have an amount of money coming into your house, it doesn't matter where it comes from, if you're lucky enough to have some left each month you can save it, if you don't you can't it no more complicated than that.

How you organise your finances is no one else's businees.

Hollowtalk - we don't know if the DH has had his savings - he may well have done

[FoxAndBear]

If you're in a situation where you're entitled to child benefit then clearly you need the financial help so it's there to help your daily life surely rather than being saved up. Tell her if she wants them to have money saved she can contribute.

[funinthesun18]

Your child’s needs right NOW are more important than a potential car when they are 17 or a house when they are adults. When they are adults they will be able to look after themselves housing wise, and a car isn’t a necessity for a teenager. Buses and trains exist. Your children need feeding and housing amongst everything else.

[PurpleTigerLove]

We still receive child benefit. I have considerable savings. I don’t feel in the slightest bit guilty . Im very good with money and am happy to offer advice to anyone over the threshold who feels they need an extra £20 a week .

[SugarIsAmazing]

Mine goes into my household finances but I don't think "oh I've got Xamount of pounds from the child benefit I need to buy something for the children."
Children don't need new things very often so the money goes on bills and food.

[usernotfound0000]

We do currently save it but only because we can afford to do so. If there ever became a point where we couldn't, I wouldn't feel at all bad about stopping it.

[Figgygal]

dont save it either it pays towards the crazy childcare bill every month.

WE do save some towards them every month but not equivalent to CB.

[Somewhereovertheroad]

We don't save it. Dh and I were 80's children from families who really struggled. We give our children the things we didn't have. They have no idea what it's like to not have enough of the basics and hopefully we can keep it that way.

[bringincrazyback]

How is this stealing from the children?

Child benefit is supposed to benefit the child, not the parents. The clue is in the name.

[Ninoo25]

You should be able to use it for whatever you want. When we used to get child benefit it was paid into the joint account and just used on general outgoings (although I think in most households with young children most outgoings benefit the children - mortgage, utilities, food, family activities etc).
We now no longer get any child benefit. OH earns just over the threshold and I am a SAHM. It does irk me slightly that a lot of people who know have significantly more take home pay than us, as they both work, but still receive child benefit which they put towards all different things. It’s not how they spend the money that annoys me, but the government’s nonsensical policy of an earner of 60K+ getting nothing (and paying more tax) and a household with a joint annual income up of to £99,998 getting the benefit (and 2 personal allowances etc). It seems grossly unfair

[Ninoo25]

Sorry a lot of people we know

[musicinthe00ssucks]

Your MiL needs to get some perspective. Like you OP I work part-time and during the nursery years every penny counts! Child Allowance is two full days at nursery per month.

[Seafoodeatit]

But the threshold isn't the same though is it? it's based on individual income not household income, do two parents earning £26k - £49k each need it more than one parent bringing in £50k - £60k? Surely it's simpler to just not worry about how/why other people spend their money?

[Ninoo25]

Btw I have no issue with it being means tested, but think it should be done in a fairer more logical way

[Iamtryingtobenicehere]

I’m old, so my child benefit was paid via a book at the post office each week!
I would save collecting my cb when it was summer holidays(from about end of May) as that meant I could afford three new pairs of Clark’s school shoes for my girlies going back to school in in September.
I would do the same for other times of year, like not collecting it from the start of the school term until maybe October when I needed winter uniform and the same again in spring when I’d buy them their summer school uniforms and maybe put some towards sandals.
But sometimes the best laid plans went to pot and I needed that money to put a couple of quid on my electric or buy other essentials. (I was far from well off with my first husband)
It would be nice to be able to save for my children when they were young, but it was an impossibility.
Maybe ask your MIL if she would set up savings accounts for all her grandchildren and she can put cash into them and spend less on buying them tatt throughout the year? She obviously feels strongly about it, let her put her money where her mouth is.

[PurpleTigerLove]

Ninoo , you cant compare a household with two working parents to yours with a Sahp . They will incur costs you don’t have . Childcare , second car etc .

[MargaretCavendish]

OH earns just over the threshold and I am a SAHM. It does irk me slightly that a lot of people who know have significantly more take home pay than us, as they both work, but still receive child benefit which they put towards all different things

But you can only think that if you think what you do as a SAHM is worthless - which I certainly don't, and I'm sure you don't either. That couple who both work will almost certainly have much higher outgoings on childcare than you, so they're not in the same position.

Where I do think it's incredibly unfair is when a single parent doesn't qualify because they're over the threshold, as they genuinely do have a greater need than two people earning the same income between them.

[Troels]

When I had my oldest I used to put it in a seperate account and use it when he needed new shoes, coats, uniforms. It worked well for us.
Now my last childs CB I put in a seperate account and use it for her school holudays/days out/extras for school. Things I wouldn't normally be able to get her.

[Mumto2two]

Purple tigerlove...I disagree. A lot of people live here because they have always lived here..and it’s hard to uproot and start again somewhere completely alien. Or people live here for reasons of work etc...there are so many reasons that can render moving somewhere else, beyond people’s ‘choice’. So no, that’s a strange assumption.
A single earning family down here, will not get much from their 50k, and I do think there is a lot that is unfair with the CB system.

[heatwave2018]

YANBU child benefit is to help feed the child and keep them safe and alive. It is not intended to be savings for their first car. Like posted by other if you can afford a lot of money to put in savings then you shouldn’t get the benefit

[Nousernameforme]

Back when dd was tiny before her siblings I used to save half of it the rest went on clothes however her brother came along 15 months later and that was that. Ever since it's been uniforms birthdays Christmas and on the occasions i get a free month its more clothes for them.

DD is 16 now and about to start college so we are giving her access to it now I think it worked out to be about £360 so nothing huge but she can kit herself out for college in clothes she likes and buy a couple of video games with it.

[PurpleTigerLove]

I don’t understand what you disagree with . That a two working parent household will incur higher costs than one with a sahp.
What costs more where you live apart from a house ?

[Maryann1975]

Am I right in thinking that the first child still gets more child benefit than younger siblings? How does that work with your mil savings scheme? Here you go child 1, you get £5000 on your 18th birthday because you were the first born. Dc 2 and 3, you got less child benefit as you are younger, so you get £3000 because the government think it costs less to raise you than your older sibling. That’s fair!! (Disclaimer- there is no actual maths gone into that calculation, I have no ideas the figures I should have used, it was an example of the unfairness to younger children).
I used to have a friend who saved her child benefit each month for the children’s future and had to go cap in hand to her husband for money as she was a SAHM and had no money of her own. He even used to go to the supermarket with her rather than give her access to money of her own. She used to get ‘housekeeping’ for any incidental purchases and it was dreadful (I now know this is financial abuse, but I was much less worldly wise when I knew her).

[PurpleTigerLove]

What if you are just good with money but earn under the threshold Heatwave ? Should you still not get CB ?
You can’t dictate how anyone spends their income regardless of where it comes from .
If you could I’d like to see a ban on buying fags , alcohol and expensive phone contracts . But only if you get child benefit. If you waste your own money that’s ok 👌