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AIBU?

to insist we get a little more help?

60 replies

homemaker40 · 22/01/2018 16:50

Our car has just broken down. It's not looking good and looks like it could be a week out of action. All of the mums I'd be friendly with at the school work and live out the other direction so I don't want to put them out by asking them to help out. We rang MIS yesterday and asked could they help out (her and SIL) and she said they were both sick and had to go to the doctor and it would be a bit far. Her house is 15 mins away from us, three mins from school and our house is 15-20 mins from school. We never ask them to help with anything, as in they're great if someone has to go to hospital or something and that's great, but other than that I'm a sahm so they don't do school pick ups or anything. We have 3 kids that go to school which I know is a lot but would fit in the car. Given that we're definitely going to have to figure something out aibu that I want to be a little more pushy to get them to bring the ekids in tomorrow? The school isn't walkable to, it's a country school so other than that we're talking taxis. So given the distance away and that it's 3 children aibu?

OP posts:

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homemaker40 · 22/01/2018 18:23

expatinscotlandI'd always help them if they needed to, I wouldn't ever stop because they might not help, they're relations and I like them!No courtesy car from garage but the rental company said they'll get back to me in the next while, also told the taxi company I'm trying to figure it out, will be roughly forty euro for all the trips in the day whereas rental is 60 but as someone said if you needed car in an emergency you're stuck! Thanks everyone so much for help I shouldn't really have posted, I was just freaked out about how the kids would get to school

OP posts:

BougieQueen · 22/01/2018 18:16

Take taxi or walk. Job done.

Invisimamma · 22/01/2018 18:11

What about a courtesy car from the garage?

Witchend · 22/01/2018 18:10

If you're 20minute drive from school you must be over the three miles to get transport from the LA.

IceBearRocks · 22/01/2018 18:06

Why are they not entitled to school transport if they live so far away from school???? If it is Thier catchment school then they should get transport.
If it's country like where we live you'd struggle to even get a taxi twice per day and there are only 4 buses per day .....bthis is why if you are going to live in the country you need two cars or to go to the catchment school!

NeverTwerkNaked · 22/01/2018 18:05

It would seem more sensible to just hire a car for the week?

If you live in a town why do your kids go to a school miles away anyway?

Skowvegas · 22/01/2018 18:01

Given where you live I'd just hire a car.

expatinscotland · 22/01/2018 18:00

'Well if they ask you for help in the future you know what your response will be now dont you?'

Oh, people like the OP will always have an excuse not to help. 'We've got three kids!' It's a one-way street with CFs. The OP and her h don't even believe the ILs are ill. Think they're trying it on. They've probably got the measure of them and are sick of being taken advantage of.

Battleax · 22/01/2018 17:58

MIL

Sullabylullaby · 22/01/2018 17:55

Who is MIS?

ArnoldBee · 22/01/2018 17:54

If it's your catchment school my council has a scheme for getting the kids to school if they have to walk on roads without pavements.

homemaker40 · 22/01/2018 17:53

expatinscotland I'm sorry I may have posted too quickly, just freaking out and seeking alternatives really

OP posts:

duffaho · 22/01/2018 17:52

Well if they ask you for help in the future you know what your response will be now dont you?

In your situation I would see how much it would be to hire a car . Taxis would be a big expense for only one return journey each day and you still wouldnt have transport for other reasons. What if one of the DC had an accident and needed to be taken to A&E.
The cost would probably be about the same and you would have the convience of transport no matter what. I wouldnt ask your ils again and would tell them why

expatinscotland · 22/01/2018 17:47

'I agree - why can't they loan you a car if they are sick they wont need it!!'

They may need it in an emergency. It's their car. Insurance. Maybe they don't trust the OP and her lazy h with their car. Unbelievable cheek to expect that, too! FFS there are some CFs out there.

expatinscotland · 22/01/2018 17:46

They're ill! Why would you want your kids to catch their illness just because you and your H are too lazy to sort out an alternative? Insist? Be pushy? I'd tell you to go sling your hook if I were your ILs.

chocatoo · 22/01/2018 17:44

I agree - why can't they loan you a car if they are sick they wont need it!!

homemaker40 · 22/01/2018 17:44

Popchyk MarieNostra will ask!:) Thewomaninthemirror Walking's out, but am looking into hiring a car or getting a taxi

OP posts:

stickytoffeevodka · 22/01/2018 17:42

Can't you hire a car? Would be cheaper than a taxi.

MarieNostra · 22/01/2018 17:40

X post with popchyk there! Great minds think alike...

MarieNostra · 22/01/2018 17:39

Would it be possible to borrow one of their cars and transfer your insurance until your own car is fixed? Or whatever way that works!

If they are sick, surely they won't be going out anywhere!

Thewomeninthemirror · 22/01/2018 17:38

Sorry but it’s your place not theirs to get your children to school.
If you have helped them out before, that’s up to you. Don’t give to receive; it doesn’t work like that!
I live in a very rural village, when my car broke down for a fortnight, I had to cope.
Hire a car or walk, don’t expect other people to drop everything and run around for you.

Popchyk · 22/01/2018 17:37

Can you borrow their car while they are out of action?

They really shouldn't be going out in their poorly condition, surely?

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homemaker40 · 22/01/2018 17:33

Sorry, insist was such a bad word! I meant ask again kind of hint we really would appreciate it kind of thing. I don't know if they are sick or not, maybe they are. Jacqueshammer I hope you're appreciated, I keep saying when the kids grow up I'm going to help as much as I can! And I think my problem is that because they live in the country and we live in the town we drop over shopping to them when they need it when we weren't dropping over anyway. We've taken their car to the garage and collected it for them, brought them to the doctors, collected prescriptions, brought the sil and bil to work and college, dropped over fuel and when we ask anything and that's so rare, there's hmming and haing and if they do say yes they say 'but it's going to be hard' or 'you know I'm only doing this to help you out and I don't really have time,' or 'I was meant to do x' followed by a 'come on, can we do this quickly'that sort of thing.

OP posts:

Mogginthemog · 22/01/2018 17:23

Yabu if they’re unwell.
And yes I try to help DD&DSIL as much as I can but if DD knew I was doing so when I wasn’t well instead of resting up she would be really upset unless it was a mega emergency.

Heartoffire · 22/01/2018 17:22

Notasperfect

Er most don’t. I help extensively with child care for my grandchildren but if I am ill I am ill.

Insisting someone who is ill takes your child to school is clearly ridiculous

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