To be mad at Starbucks hosting a musical baby morning

[imnotreally]

My local Starbucks is located on the junction of an A road, just outside of town. People go there to work or to take business meetings. It also happens to be near the towns crematorium so a lot of mourners stop there for a coffee. I go because it’s a grown up coffee, away from the kids, I can have peace and quiet and think or work.

This morning I got there and half the seating was reserved. It turned out that a large portion of the seating area was being turned into a mother and baby/toddler group. Ok, fair enough but not really what you expect from a place where professionals meet. Then came the music. Loud kids music which involved clapping and singing along.

Am I being unreasonable to think they picked a totally inappropriate place and Starbucks are crazy to have arranged it?!

[grannytomine]

Thought about this thread yesterday, I was on a train with one woman playing her music quite loudly and one man having a long business call, very loud and constantly telling the other person to remember all this information was confidential, yes right. Returning home today the woman sitting next to me ripped the plastic cover off her egg mayonnaise salad. The smell was awful. Two young men talking loudly and unable to complete one sentence without swearing.

The children on the train were all behaving beautifully. Adults, you can't go anywhere without annoying adults.

[Stickerrocks]

My local Waterstones café is the way forward. All toddlers safely tucked away around the corner with bean bags and slides. Nice large tables, sofas and benches spread around so everyone can pick somewhere appropriate to sit and jolly nice cakes & toasties.

[JanKind]

If you want a grown up coffee then don't go to Starbucks bcoffee is crap. I am not a mother, but I think it's great they had a mums and kids thing. So many coffee places don't encourage mothers with children.

[Aspatria]

Imagine advocating for toddlers to be free to behave like toddlers in public. What a monumental bitch.

Your words, not mine.
Toddlers can very well be managed and behave (more or less) appropriately in public places. They can have a blast without being a nuisance, but it involve some efforts from the grown-ups. It's called parenting.

[Spangles1963]

Further to the previous comments about using a coffee shop as a workplace or somewhere to hold a business meeting,I've always been a bit at the logic of this. I've seen people being interviewed for jobs in my local Costa and Cafe Nero. To my mind,a coffee shop is far from suitable for something like this. Too noisy for a start,and too many people nearby eaves-dropping. But I DO agree with the OP about not being thrilled to see the coffee shop being used as a venue for a singalong session for babies or toddlers. I've had this happen just once thankfully,in my favourite Costa. I sat as far away as possible from the group.

[Whereisthegin1978]

If my local Starbucks did this - I go here after the school drop on my days off for a quiet coffee - I'd be slightly irritated but I get it. There is money to made fron mums and toddlers !

[imnotreally]

lemonshark I’m here bemused by the number of people who think I was working (I wasn’t, I was having a quiet 5 minutes) and also the number of people who think I’m against kids being in coffee shops! I’m really not against kids in coffee shops. It’s the singing.

Conversely I was in town the other day at the other Starbucks and they were hosting a similar event and I wasn’t quite so annoyed by that one. Possibly because that Starbucks is accessible on foot and is in the middle of a shopping area so it made more sense to have a play group there. Also the layout is different in that the kids were in a section well away from the rest of the coffee shop.

The other Starbucks is off a roundabout of a main bypass that links north wales with the rest of the country. Very few people walk there, it’s next to a budget hotel, so it’s a well used meeting place among the local community. Also the seating area is very square so you can’t get away from the music. Add to the that the fact that the laptop one coffee brigade hog the other end of the seating area, the only place left for the rest of us is in the middle.

When I left there were 2 mums there. Well there were other mums but they’d just gone for a regular coffee and weren’t joining in the arranged activities.

There are plenty of other coffee shops in the area - where I live is quite touristy. However Starbucks is the closest and I prefer their coffee. Did not know about the tax evasion.

If you really want to take your kids places, our town is overrun with soft play centres and plenty of those host some kind of music event. Plus there’s usually singing in the library on a Friday.

Personally if I’m taking my kids for coffee I take them somewhere cheaper

[VivaLeBeaver]

*
'm happy for my toddler to talk loudly, sing and express her feelings, coffee shop or not. Her development and sense of security is my priority. Being loud and excitable is age appropriate behaviour

Being loud and excitable is a pita for everyone else around. Never too young to learn that you’re not the only pebble on the beach as my mother would say, that you should consider others. I would never have let dd be loud and excitable in a coffee shop. She seems to have developed just fine, perfectly secure and also considerate of others.

Some kid was scootering up and down Starbucks the other day. Guess that’s age appropriate behaviour?

[Spacesuitmakeover]

I am an "agile worker", it requires a lot of travel and lots of seeking out Wi-Fi for catching up on work between meetings, I never use Starbucks or Costa, they are too rowdy and often have baby/small children.

Plenty of other places, there are even venues opening aimed at people working and wanting coffee/lunch with good wifi and no music.

I would have just taken my coffee and left, no point getting upset by it.

[VivaLeBeaver]

Myself and a friend got a bollocking in a cafe once.

We stayed about 45 mins both had coffee and were chatting non stop. Bloke on the next table who was working on a laptop and I frequently see in there —using it as an office— told us off for talking loudly when he was trying to work!

I do have to say I would find an organised musical type event irritating. Coffee shops are for drinking coffee, eating cake and chatting to friends or reading a newspaper! Not a play group setting. But I accept it’s up to the business owner, I wouldn’t return to such a cafe. Or certainly avoid it at that time/day.

[notacooldad]

'm happy for my toddler to talk loudly, sing and express her feelings, coffee shop or not. Her development and sense of security is my priority. Being loud and excitable is age appropriate behaviour
I would have thought toddler age is the right age to teach them when it's ok to be loud and noisy e.g. in parks, splashing in puddles, at sing a long sessions and then there's times when they need to be quieter.
Surely you don't think it woukd be ok to have a toddler expressing themselves loudly if they were visting a sick relative in hospital or being in a church or similar?
Or are you just a parent who thinks screw everyone else, my child can do what they want regardless?

[Clandestino]

So a coffee (and other expensive stuff to eat and drink) selling shop wants to cater for a group that may spend some money there instead of one or two people hogging a big table for a day, using up the WIFI while sipping on a rapidly cooling single cup of coffee.
Hm ... let me guess what I'd prefer as a business owner.

[LaurieMarlow]

of course, there's always one... The saddest thing is that these parents do exist in real life.

I no rite? Imagine advocating for toddlers to be free to behave like toddlers in public. What a monumental bitch.

[LaurieMarlow]

The most hipster coffee shops round my way demonstrate their hipster credentials by having no wifi. Which is an excellent way to deter those who want to work there. I was hoping to work there for the afternoon, but they lost my business, which is fine, entirely their choice. I went to Nero.

[bummypicklemummy]

Well people choose to go in there for some peace and quiet. Not everyone likes to listen to people bellowing down their phone in a one sided conversation.

[Aspatria]

'm happy for my toddler to talk loudly, sing and express her feelings, coffee shop or not. Her development and sense of security is my priority. Being loud and excitable is age appropriate behaviour

of course, there's always one...

The saddest thing is that these parents do exist in real life.

[bummypicklemummy]

I meant to say phone calls. Obviously texting and emailing is fine. It's lovely in there.

[cantucciniamaretto]

They can't ban phones. What are they going to do, frisk you and confiscate?

[IWannaSeeHowItEnds]

See, I'd avoid a coffee shop that banned phones. I'm a grown up and can decide for myself what to do - I don't want to overpay for coffee and get bossed about for the privilige!

[Taffeta]

Meetings have been going on in places like this for years

20 years ago we used to meet in hotel lobbies

Coffee shops are great for work catch ups

Also great for mums with small kids

I’d draw the line at loud singing though. Anywhere!

But YABU overall as Starbucks coffee is fucking grim and their principles are shit. Try another coffee shop.

[Aspatria]

Our only coffee shop in town has banned phones.
As long as there's enough warning, that's a good idea if they mean "Phone calls". Checking your emails or internet is not a disturbance.

[NewYearNiki]

Well they can host who they like. But if they get alot of business from others then they will likely lose that if this becomes a regular feature.

Im sorry to say having participated in enough baby groups the adults tend to buy a coffee if that and bring in all their own snacks for the kids the remnants of which they leave all over the tables and floor.
Coupled with music and singing, a line for the toilet and baby change, bins overflowing with dirty nappies.

Fuck it. I'd stop going.

[bummypicklemummy]

Our only coffee shop in town has banned phones. It's lovely.

[Kokeshi123]

A private sector company may decide what they want going on there. If they want to prioritize parents and babies, they can do that. If they want to say "no noisy groups" and put the focus on people doing business over coffee, they can do that too. It's up to them.

Nothing wrong with informal meetings in a coffee shop, but it's up to the coffee shop whether they want to cater to that or not.

I don't know about the UK, but in Japan you get rental business spaces which are used for small, casual meetings. You go and pay a small sum of money per hour per person, and there is a coffee/tea machine, vending machine with snacks and so on.

[Deciduous]

Oh certainly, or indeed if businessmen did. The fact that the café are hosting this makes all the difference here.