To miss someone I can’t have?

[AhhhhHotelBlisss]

Any solutions please?

[GlassTea]

Yes I have! How’s the careers threads going?

[Pombearsandnaiceham]

OP are you sure you haven't posted about this before?

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/3088196-Would-you-go-out-with-your-best-friend-s-brother

[GlassTea]

Bump

[GlassTea]

He messaged though! Asking me to go on a date with his friend 😂 😔 do I carry on the convo?

[AnonymousAuthor111]

OP just message him. A friendly hi how’re you on messenger...?

[GlassTea]

Any advice? (Sorry! Urgh am upset and stressed with other things so focusing on wrong thing)

[GlassTea]

Absolutely friend zoned right!!!

[GlassTea]

OP here.

So - he messaged asking if I wanted to go to an event with his friend, I couldn’t make it so said no (politely!) - have spoken with his sibling and turns out friend asked bro to ask. Wah!

[Eliza9917]

Speak to your friend about whether she would be ok with you getting together, if that happens.

Then speak to him and ask him out. If your friend is ok with it. If she isn't, could he be 'the one' and decide whether it's worth risking your friendship.

If you don't ask, you don't get. She/he can only say no. You'll never know if you don't ask.

Personally, I think life is too short and we need to grab our chances when they present themselves. So, if he makes you feel how you've said, I'd say go for it.

[Aperolspritzer123]

I mean on messenger or however he messaged you last time.. not in person in case that wasn’t clear

[Aperolspritzer123]

I think that you need to think of a reason to get the conversation going with him.. you don’t have to be blatant about how you feel but just something to build on. The direction the conversation takes will imo tell you what you need to know! That’s what I’d do!
Good luck!

[AhhhhHotelBlisss]

The friend has again been using social media to its intended effect - the guy I like has been tagging (funny) posts of mine with friend’s name so hardly discouraging it

[AhhhhHotelBlisss]

His sibling (my friend) said this other guy was keen! I assume the guy I like has been trying to set us both up. I met the friend vaguely and while he’s really funny he’s not massively my type! This makes it worse. He’s def not interested is he haha - oh welll

[Graceflorrick]

.

[Dozer]

Who told you this? Good opportunity for you to respond “he’s OK and all that, but I far prefer X”!

Unless the other guy is nice, attractive and more local of course!

[AhhhhHotelBlisss]

update: his friend is keen on me apparently. Found out earlier. Can’t help but feel the guy I like was wing-manning him. Oh dear

[JFSB]

This is your third thread about him OP, why don’t you make a move?

[QueenofallIsee]

I have developed an inappropriate crush on an old school mate- DP and I are in a bad ish place and I think that's prompted it. Nothing to be done but daydream and wait for it to pass! Sigh

[Dozer]

Conker, why be a wallflower: just approach him directly and you’ll know! Nothing to do with your friend.

[ConkerGame]

No tips, I'm afraid! I've tried to meet up with him without my friend but it always falls through! I've now had to watch him kiss two girls on nights out with the three of us! It was heart wrenching for me but I had to put a brace face on it as friend was there and had no idea! Someone once asked me why I wasn't going out with him and my friend jumped in and said "oh no, they don't like each other!" Before I got a chance to answer!

I sometimes wonder if I should tell her and hope that she encourages him to ask me out. But equally I can imagine her saying oh no you're not his type at all, move on!

[ReanimatedSGB]

Just invite him out. If he says no, then you will know he's not interested, and if he says yes you might be all set for some fun times.

I agree with PP that his sister might simply not consider her little brother as dating material. I have a kid brother (well, he's now a happily married man and 50 years old, so not such a kid) and when I was younger I would never have thought of him as someone for my friends to date. We know too much about our little brothers' horrible habits etc and still tend to see them as kids.

[Dozer]

If there is potential to live in the same city in future there’d be no harm - apart from potentially to your pride - in letting him know you find him attractive and suggesting he gets in touch if he’s ever in your town!

[Dozer]

Eh? Posters suggesting you either ask a man out or leave it are somehow implying you should behave like a nun?

[Nettletheelf]

You don’t need a chastity belt, bliss. Just look for somebody (or several somebodies) who really wants to have a relationship with you. I bet here are loads.

[AhhhhHotelBlisss]

Hopefully I will get the chance to know him better down the line but until then, I will rest easy. Luckily there is a chance he may move down to my city soon anyway