So wtf was Adam Sandler DOING??

[MrsOverTheRoad]

www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-5027717/Twitter-slams-Adam-Sandler-touches-Claire-Foy-s-knee.html

Yes it's the DM sorry.

He kept touching her knee! What was that all about then??

[Pumperthepumper]

*and similarly, helps people who are victims of other unwanted behaviour from different predators to come forward, because there is a belief they are telling the truth. I can't see how minimising a women's account of what she considers abuse helps anyone.

[Pumperthepumper]

I am on the side of victims, I think we have a different view of who is a victim. I think we definitely do. I think if these women say they were a victim of Harvey Weinstein then I believe them.

I don't think it helps people who are victims to have lots of people joining in I disagree. It helps paint a picture of predatory behaviour and means they are more likely to be believed.

[grannytomine]

I am on the side of victims, I think we have a different view of who is a victim.

On the quote did you notice where is said, some of them have sounded non events Some is very important, I don't think it helps people who are victims to have lots of people joining in. He was crass with the women who turned him down but from what they said he accepted the "No." So he was crass but I don't think that is the same as abuse. Other women he didn't accept the no and that is serious and needs to be seen as serious.

[Pumperthepumper]

crispbutty that's been discussed on here too. I (and others) think that his behaviour was inappropriate, he got lucky that Claire Foy didn't. She's within her rights to not want a male colleague (for want of a better word) to touch her leg.

[Pumperthepumper]

Here's where you said it, page 7:

I think this was a non event, I think there have been several instances of non events lately, I've heard several actresses talking about Harvey Weinstein and some of them have sounded non events. He asked them for a massage, or offered a massage they declined and left. Well if you are a grown up, obviously totally different if we are talking about children, people ask you out, some times it is crass but as long as they accept it when you say no then where's the harm? Do we really want a society where a man, or woman, takes their lives and reputations in their hands if they want to ask someone out for a drink?

Whose side are you on here? Not the people who he inappropriately propositioned, who you think are 'jumping on the bandwagon' ie the victims.

[grannytomine]

And they were on tv sticking up for Harvey Weisnstien? Or were they on tv talking about how inappropriate his behaviour was? They were undermining the women who were talking about real abuse from Harvey Weinstein. Inappropriate isn't the same as abuse.

[grannytomine]

Crispbutty, God no, what does she know about it compared to the permanently offended on here.

[grannytomine]

And no, I can't see how they're different. Please explain to me again why I should feel sorry for Harvey Weinstein, and why he's the real victim when he's asking women to massage him against their will. Do tell me where I said that? You can't can you because you have to make things up don't you?

I will say again he asked these two women if they would massage him, different occasions, they declined and left. Even the interviewer was struggling, trying to ask about "and what happened next" and the answer was nothing. That isn't the same as women he attacked. That is women jumping on the bandwagon.

Don't tell me about minimising abuse, when I was working on the vice squad we prosecuted men who raped prostitutes or attacked them or robbed them. If a crime is committed doesn't matter what the woman is doing. Wouldn't have bothered with a woman who said and man propositioned her she declined and he accepted that.

[Crispbutty]

Is it worth mentioning that Clare foy has said SHE wasn't offended, or intimidated, or horrified by it at all.

[DeleteOrDecay]

He asked a question and accepted the answer.

A question that he shouldn’t have asked in the first place.

[Pumperthepumper]

I'm talking about the women I referred to earlier, they were interviewed on TV. They had both been alone in his hotel room with him, he asked for a massage they said no and left. This isn't at all the same as women he has threatened or raped. He asked a question and accepted the answer.


And they were on tv sticking up for Harvey Weisnstien? Or were they on tv talking about how inappropriate his behaviour was?

[grannytomine]

I'm talking about the women I referred to earlier, they were interviewed on TV. They had both been alone in his hotel room with him, he asked for a massage they said no and left. This isn't at all the same as women he has threatened or raped. He asked a question and accepted the answer.

[Pumperthepumper]

Pumperthepumper, no I'm not. What I am is against the people who want to jump on the bandwagon, the people who want a headline, the people who don't care that they undermine the case for the people who have been raped and assaulted by making out that a man coming on to the in his hotel room is exactly the same thing. Maybe you need to think about that.

Ok, I've thought about it. And you're still wrong. It's scary that you're worried about minimising 'real' abuse in the same post as...em...minimising real abuse.

And no, I can't see how they're different. Please explain to me again why I should feel sorry for Harvey Weinstein, and why he's the real victim when he's asking women to massage him against their will.

[DeleteOrDecay]

Definitely not victim blaming because the women I am talking about were not victims.

Which women are you talking about?

[grannytomine]

You can't be serious with this bollocks. Have you heard of the phrase 'victim blaming'? Definitely not victim blaming because the women I am talking about were not victims. They chose to go to him room, he propositioned them and they said no and left. Where is the victim?

[grannytomine]

grannytomine here's some women's views that you might find interesting on why it was so risky to say no to Harvey Weinstein. But you're just goading, aren't you? Not the same as the women who talked on TV, they were alone with him in his room, he asked them for a massage they declined and then asked if he could massage her and she was fully clothed, she declined and left. Can't you see that they are totally different?

[grannytomine]

Pumperthepumper, no I'm not. What I am is against the people who want to jump on the bandwagon, the people who want a headline, the people who don't care that they undermine the case for the people who have been raped and assaulted by making out that a man coming on to the in his hotel room is exactly the same thing. Maybe you need to think about that.

[Pumperthepumper]

Just take a second to realise grannytomine - you are literally sticking up for Harvey Weinstein here. You might be the only person in the world, aside from him, who's on his side. Have a think about why that may be.

[Pumperthepumper]

Trigger warning on attached articles, sorry

grannytomine here's some women's views that you might find interesting on why it was so risky to say no to Harvey Weinstein. But you're just goading, aren't you?

[Pumperthepumper]

Weren't they young women who were in his hotel room? Not just some random unknown young woman. Maybe if you are confident enough to be alone in a hotel room with a man you need to be confident enough to say "No." The women who I've heard moaning about the massage thing had no repercussions, they left. Big deal.

You can't be serious with this bollocks. Have you heard of the phrase 'victim blaming'?

[Whitney168]

I think this thread shows how manipulative it can be to show a snapshot of something.

In the context of this clip (which I saw before the whole show), I agree it looks very uncomfortable and dodgy.

In the context of the wider show, even going in with a negative preconception, I saw no discomfort at all between them and fully agree with the dance of the missed pat on the hand that others have described.

[grannytomine]

And totally ignoring the fact that he was in a position of power and went on to threaten them if they objected. I specifically said the ones I heard talking about this declined the offer and left, there was nothing about threats.

[grannytomine]

Such a shame for them isn't it? All these men, just casually asking young women for a massage, these poor older men and tempting younger women, and the women have the nerve to be offended? What happened to just being able to ask a young women in a professional context for a massage when you're a much older, married man with loads of power over their careers? It's madness! What a shame for the next generation if they can't ask random people they don't know to watch them have a bath. How will people ever form relationships if we put a stop to this? Weren't they young women who were in his hotel room? Not just some random unknown young woman. Maybe if you are confident enough to be alone in a hotel room with a man you need to be confident enough to say "No." The women who I've heard moaning about the massage thing had no repercussions, they left. Big deal.

[GymBunnieWannabe]

And her 'facial reaction' is in response to the confusion and embarrassment of her going to touch his hand in return but it being moved because it all got a bit muddled.

[GymBunnieWannabe]

I saw it as he put his hand there and she went to rest her hand on his hand in reciprocation but he moved his hand too quickly.
So she went to put her hand on his (whilst it was in his knee) but he moved so it all got a bit funny.

She says it wasn't offensive to her.

I think she was trying to pat his hand in a friendly way but he moved.