AIBU to resign?

[Ameliel]

I would love to hear your opinion; AIBU to resign? I have a pretty good job but my boss is driving me mad. I work as a designer for a consultancy. I realise I'm very lucky as I work 4 day week; money is pretty good, the office is 10 minutes from my house . I get a bonus, private health insurance, have allocated parking, nice desk and I like my job and feel that I'm totally on top of it... but it's just one thing that brings it all down...my boss is a total control freak. We need to sign in every morning and in and out even for lunch. If you're one minute late you are in trouble. My boss doesn't like microwave ovens so we haven't got one - I hear he actually threw the last microwave out after someone cooked "too smelly " food. Today I was told of for taking too many personal calls at work time. I have nanny who sometimes calls for advise, I feel that I need to take these calls. Few weeks ago my daughter was poorly,so I stayed home with her while the nanny took my other two to school. Then went to work for about an hour, then took my daughter to doctors (that was the only appointment available), then worked from home until nanny was back home with the other two children, then went to office and worked until late to make my hours up. I got told off , my boss said I should have not worked from home but should have taken a holiday instead. He is basically very set in his ways; quite chauvinist (and I'm the only female engineer in the company of 25 , I often feel he looks down on me because of my sex). he doesn't approve flexible hours or working from home ( even in emergencies). I have plenty of experience and used to have a lot more responsibility in my last job, but in this job I have to run everything past the boss. I have been there for 2.5years and was hoping it would have been my "forever " job, but I'm not sure anymore.. it seems like a dead end. There's no trust or communication, my boss doesn't include me in any decisions. I have been looking around and could find another job fairly easily...But I don't think I will find anything as good in terms of location or remuneration if I leave, but the constant controlling of every little thing is eroding my confidence and making me feel really down... am I overreacting or should I just keep my head down and appreciate the good points of the job? WWYD?

[TheMysteriousJackelope]

The time thing could also be for billing. I worked for a division of my old employer where I was rented out to other departments who needed an engineer for a few hours a week. I had to keep careful track of my time and what I did for billing purposes.

I had to do the same when I was self employed too, for my own peace of mind that I wasn't billing customers for non-productive hours.

[TeatimeForTheSoul]

Rainbow sorry you've got the same

[RainbowBriteRules]

Teatime . Same position here.

[TeatimeForTheSoul]

I can empathise with what you are saying about micro-management. It's like a slow drip, drip effect. Other people can just ignore it but it really effects others.
I had a change of manager from one with a 'your a highly qualified individual and I trust you' attitude to a 'clock-watching micro-manager'. Respect has to be mutual. It's soul destroying and I'm planning my exit even though I love my job.

[SheRaaarghPrincessOfPower]

God yes. Retail, warehouse, anything like that. Most hospitals have stricter rules than this

But then.. If you're not happy, you're not happy. The risk is getting another job and finding it's no different

[RainbowBriteRules]

Why should it be a wind up? If she cannot get another job then yes, she will have to suck it up. If she can find another job without an evil boss then it's surely worth it. Life's not a race to the bottom.

[DasPepe]

Yes but once you leave the warehouse - that's it, your time is your time.
There are a lot of jobs with "perks" when you are also expected to either be available or you do spend an awful amount of your personal time thinking and solving work problems. If you added up all this time the pay would go down considerably and the perks not worth the pressure

[missymayhemsmum]

Have a talk with your boss. Explain that in previous roles you had flexibility and felt trusted to deliver. You appreciate that there has to be discipline in the office, but that you would like him to manage you by results not timekeeping. he has probably had piss takers previously, and is now strict and a bit old fashioned as a result. If he's not receptive then you know where you stand, but in lots of ways your job is ideal, and you'd be losing a lot by moving.

[MrHussain]

Is this a wind up ? I'd love to see you work in a warehouse for one day and see how you get on. There is millions out there that would love to be in your position. Toughen up and get on with it.

[GlitteryGlitter]

I'm in the same situation but I've been tgere 4 years and it's literally destroyed my soul, it's taken a mental breakdown and therapy to see it's not me, my confidence was so worn down and I was made to feel so useless.
I'm currently on mat leave and in the process of plotting my escape, unfortunately I'll have to return for a while but now I know it's them not me so hopefully I'll be stronger.

Don't let them grind you down it's not worth your health.

[TroysMammy]

Signing in and out could be for safety reasons. It was mentioned in a recent fire safety training course. In a building evacuation everyone can be accounted for.

[TheMysteriousJackelope]

I worked as an engineer.
We had to swipe a card to go in and out for security reasons as well as pay.
Using holiday to care for a sick child was expected.
The site manager used to review the site phone records to see who was making personal calls.
Cooking smelly food in the microwave was not appreciated.

So even if you leave, you could find the above at another workplace.

I agree with you about the micromanagement though. I have worked for a manager who was mentally ill, another was a bully, and one had no idea what I did and used to assign completely unrealistic time constraints. Although annoying to various degrees they were nowhere near as frustrating, confidence destroying, and flat out insulting as the one micro-manager I had to work for briefly.

[StillMedusa]

In my job (education) we have to check in and out, even to pop to the co-op to get lunch.
No phones allowed in the classroom..they have to stay on silent in the cupboard... in an emergency you are (reluctantly) allowed to keep it with you on silent.
We do have a microwave in teh staff room but also a ton of passive agressive notes about keeping it clean !

TBH your hours and perks sound pretty good... I'd be wary of jumping ship only to find that somewhere else is no different!

[Ameliel]

Thanks for your comments. The boss is the owner of the company; he is keeping very tight rein on everything. I'm not opposed to signing in and out but the fact that I'll get told off if I'm even one minute late (happens occasionally even I try very hard not to be), is demoralising. He doesn't appreciate that I always make up any lateness and habitually work late, so end up doing more than enough hours. I take the point about personal telephone calls but I never call out during work time; I take short calls from my nanny/ family. It's all so inflexible and makes me feel like I'm at school! I take pride in what I do but don't feel appreciated. I know I can't change my boss, he has a real OCD (other colleagues agree but everyone just kind of puts up with it).

[brendani9]

Micromanager broke my last job. It's horrible when done badly. YANBU.
The signing in, the microwave etc is just detail (not understating the impact it has on you) but it is the process by which they control. And tell themselves they're better than you.
Do your utmost to find something else, or make them look like cnuts until the gilt is stripped from the gingerbread.

[qwertyuiop1234]

Is the boss new OP?

[MikeUniformMike]

Keep the phonecalls to a minimum. Watch your timekeeping.
Look for another job.

[pinotnoirismyjam]

He sounds a little bit overzealous in the micromanaging!

Only thing I'd query is did you ask for permission before working from home? My workplace is very flexible, but it's still expected to discuss and agree working from home arrangements ahead of time, unless it's a last-minute childcare issue, in which case you'd take leave if can't pre-plan cover.

Personally I'd say the benefits outweigh the little niggles, but that depends on the extent to which they are annoying you!

[nosleepforme]

i used to have a micromanager and it was the best job i ever had. i just learnt how to deal with my manager.
i think the only person that can tell you if you should quit is you yourself. it seems like you know the answer but dont want to admit it.

[ilovesooty]

phone in sick every time there is an emergency

Really?

[poweredbybread]

What mydietstartsmondaysaid

[mydietstartsmonday]

Head down take the money. Get in on time leave on time, phone in sick every time there is an emergency.
Smile.

[SnowiestMountain]

I don't think you're compatible, it seems your boss is on the stricter side of standard procedures whilst you are looking for something more flexible which it is unlikely this company is going to offer

I'd look for something else, but I wouldn't go along the route of this company being particularly at fault, it just doesn't work for you and your circumstances

[ReinettePompadour]

Its clearly getting you down so YANBU to want to work in a different environment.

However, I used to be emergency services and I did have to clock in and out. We didn't have a microwave because the previous one didn't have its electrical testing certificate maintained so they just removed them. We definitely couldn't take personal calls except in dire emergencies and we couldn't work from home.

These things aren't unusual but if you know that your job could easily be done from home and that taking the odd phone call wouldn't interfere with your work and you could easily work flexibly because your role enables flexible working then theres no reason why you should not start job hunting. You only get 1 life and it's too short to spend it working for a prat.

[SaintEyning]

I just resigned because a micromanager was reinstated as my line manager after having had all responsibility stripped three and a half years ago for same. New boss, no knowledge of the backstory, coronation and immediate resignation. The micromanager is now managing the 'no detail' boss upward and I can see it's beginning to dawn that a huge mistake was made. Oh well, I'll take a pay cut in exchange for my sanity. Every Day Of The Week. Life is too short to hate what you spend your waking hours doing. Good luck - find a way to free yourself - mine was a 50% downsize in home which allows the pay cut.