About minute silences at work

[onesupplied]

We had a one minute silence today to recognise the Grenfell tragedy.

We all received an email well in advance about this. Our office manager sets off an alarm at 11am and when the silence is over. We've (sadly) done this a couple of times now in the past month.

There still remain a few colleagues who seem to take no notice. Although not talking they're typing, clicking, scrolling, shuffling papers.

AIBU to think that this is bloody disrespectful and that everyone can afford to take one minute out of their day?

[ArgyMargy]

Perhaps we could have something that rolls up all the tragic events that are not war-related. There are many events in living memory that touched large numbers of people and communities in this country. I think we can't just have a minute and then move on; it's just meaningless. Remembrance Day works so well because everyone knows what it's about and why they are being asked to remember.

[Mulledwine1]

If instead of standing silent for 60 seconds everybody put 60p into a charity box it might make a difference

very good point

[LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726]

Phoebefromfriends Mon 19-Jun-17 19:45:27
Unfortunately our office forgot so it wasn't observed. During the last one I announced loudly that we were observing it and according to my manager no-one moved for at least three minutes because I was so forthright. In the end I had to tell them it had ended, despite there being a clock in the office. I do think it's up to individuals whether they observe it but those that don't should be quiet.

<br />
Missed this little gem.  It's such an indictment of the mindless entitlement of some people that they feel empowered to enforce certain behaviours from others.  Sounds like a failed power-trip to me and perhaps a wannabe-dictator in the making?  That post made me cringe with embarrassment for the poster.<br />
<br />
<strong>Phoebe</strong>, if you'd done that in our office, you would be laughed out of it and roundly educated on the reasons why you were not, in fact, in charge.<br />
~~~~~~~~~<br />
<br />
I've been giving this more thought and I'm wondering where it's going to end.  Our children will see this as 'normal' and I can quite envisage a scenario whereby the 'moments of silence' get so far out of hand that people truly will get to the stage where they won't know what or why they're standing for whatever prescribed minutes are handed down.  It will become totally normal to follow the media to determine whether 'minutes of silence' are required - and for which 'thing' and for how long?<br />
<br />
That would be abhorrent to me.  I think it would actually make a mockery of any semblance of 'paying respects'.  It's nothing like paying respects and you would grossly insult the family and loved ones if you attempted to portray anything like this with a 'public display' of mock-grief.<br />
<br />
I think that far from being respectful, you are diluting and taking away the meaningfulness of the Remembrance silence.  It's completely disrespectful, doing an enormous disservice to the fallen men and women who defended our country... and that's not ok with me.<br />
<br />
Here's the difference though; the people who feel as I do that this is not something to engage in will not be huffing and puffing at those who do want to participate.  We'll be quietly getting on with our day, not intruding, not being loud or trying to draw attention to ourselves because we recognise that for you, it's important to be part of the group and show publicly how 'caring' you are for those long sixty seconds.<br />
<br />
Other than having an inner WTF? thought, you won't register on my radar.  I'd appreciate the same courtesy.

[olliegarchy99]

agree with lyingwitch
dopeydozy - I feel exactly the same

[Hothothotsummer]

Exactly lyingwitch

[ArgyMargy]

Totally agree, LyingWitch.

[LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726]

I'm cynical about these companies with their 'pause minutes' and their pointed telling everybody including customers that they will be observing. It sounds nauseating to me, overdone and people follow 'the management' sheep-like.

Fine if that's what they want to do, I wouldn't bat an eyelid and wouldn't engage in anything distracting but that wouldn't be enough for some of the posters on this thread who need and crave validation that what they're doing is something remarkable. Added to which, such is their indignation and sense of superiority that anybody not being seen to stop-and-reflect in some theatrical format, is to be chastised and 'made to' see the error of their ways.

I was at Bristol Airport during one of these silences and it was like watching a game of "What's The Time, Mr Wolf" with all the outraged swivelling around to see who was daring to move during the silence 'for the Manchester victims'.

Respectful it is not. Not in my book. It's nothing more than a pointless public display of 'greeee-vvinnggg' and it makes me shudder that people are so quick to buy into this ridiculous concept without understanding what it is they are doing, or why.

Stand and gaze vacantly/downcast/heavenwards if you like. Just don't stand in my way and don't pillory me or anybody else for not engaging in this nonsense with you.

[OvariesBeforeBrovaries]

I wasn't able to observe the silences for Manchester or Grenfell. We don't have the option of just putting our phones off the hook for a minute, or asking people to hold while we take part in the silence.

I think the posts earlier in the thread that say "there's no excuse for offices not doing it" is pretty naive to be honest.

[user1476869312]

Actually, I would now be quite happy to go about my business and, if any officious fuckwit told me to shut up, reply loudly and clearly that other people could do what they liked but I would not be participating in this pointless, irrelevant bullshit.

[Hothothotsummer]

Tbh when everybody was asked to observe the silence at the gym the other day I wasn't even sure which tragedy we were remembering. That's how meaningless it felt.

[carefreeeee]

also it doesn't work. the point of the remembrance silence is to remind us never to go to war again. whereas it is now used to glorify war and we continue to participate in wars every year all over the world meanwhile selling arms to everyone left right and centre and propping up extremist regimes. I am opposed to remembrance rituals of any sort. they just become an excuse. This doesn't mean I don't feel sad for and remember and respect those who died.

[DopeyDazy]

Its not law its a choice. I do silence on remembrance day and thats it

[carefreeeee]

it's a personal choice. what is the point of all these silences? 1,000 people die on our roads every year and they don't get a silence. Why are people who die due to terrorism somehow more special than those who die of other things?

[StealthPolarBear]

What is a pause-minute?
Did you really need a reminder to think about it?

[TalkinPeece]

but WHY is it observed?
Who decides which tragedies get a minute?
which get none?
Why is a late night attack remembered at 11am ?
And what good comes out of it ?

Nothing will change if we all stand around for a minute most weeks
only by speaking up and engaging with others will things get better

[user1492287253]

where i work it is fully observed. despite being call based, all staff are told to tell customers at 5 to the company is observing and they will be called back. there is a large communal space to gather. of course it is not compulsory but im yet to see anyone who doesnt

[2rebecca]

I didn't know it was happening until after it had happened either as at home and no radio or TV on that morning. When I got to work at lunchtime no-one knew there'd been one either. We're in Scotland .

[daisychain01]

I must be far too compliant then. It never occurred to me that a minute' silence was state- or management-sanctioned.

It's an opportunity for a pause-moment to think about the tragedy and empathy for those who have lost so much. Simple as that. We all took part at work. People on the phones were able to quickly end their call and still have a moment of quiet. Nobody objected or refused to be involved.

[BarryTheKestrel]

I work in an inbound contact centre and we turn the phone lines off for a minute. Any customers on the phone are asked if they would like to be placed on hold for a minute or to receive a call back later on in the day. I wasn't working for the minutes silence this week however I am sure it was the same as all the others. Everyone stops working completely for a minute, even if they do not wish to observe I have only had the displeasure of sitting next to someone who decided to ruin it for those around by speaking all the way through it.

[TheFirstMrsDV]

I missed the silence for Grenfell Tower.
I didn't even know it was happening.

I have thought of very little else since the disaster happened. London is my city and we have had so much happen recently.
It seems pretty relentless.

I don't mind silences. They have their place. But I do mind the expectation that we HAVE to have them or we don't care. It has become about being seen to do something. Considering the lack of 'doing something' that led to this terrible event I think a minute doing nothing would be ironic if it wasn't so insulting.

Its like flying flags at half mast. That never used to happen. Now it does because if it doesn't the local authority might get tweeted by people say 'if it was Muslims/immigrants you would have done it!' or similar nonsense.
No one is prepared to stand up to stupidity anymore. They just cave in and everything loses its value and power.

Its all just another instagram opportunity.

[Sushi123]

Why are people so concerned with what other people are doing...you observed the silence, fine, respectful and your choice. Why concern yourself with others. Just get on with your day

[MrsHathaway]

The local football team had a minute's silence in memory of DH's grandad when he died as he (and his forebears and his descendants) had been a lifelong supporter of the club including being a steward for a while. It meant a great deal to his sons and grandsons.

A few days after 9/11 the shop I was working in actually shut for a few minutes so we could all go out into the city square to join in with a big silence at 11am. Pretty much the entire city shut down for a couple of minutes. It was eerie and very powerful. About fifteen minutes later, an American tourist came into our shop. He was overwhelmed with emotion at the solidarity shown by all these British people at what he had felt was an American tragedy.

HOWEVER

I agree with pps that there's a problem of overuse. Yesterday it wasn't immediately clear whether we were silent for Grenfell or Finsbury Park - there's been such a density of tragedy recently that our responses are overlapping. If it becomes "bloody hell, not another one" then it completely loses its meaning.

[GahBuggerit]

I'm a typer/clicker as are most of my colleagues. I'm practically silent though as my keyboard is a horrible cushioned thing.

I had no idea it wasn't ok to do this I thought it was just about the not speaking. I will cease all activities completely for the next one, let's hope it's not for a long time.

[Whathaveilost]

Me and my colleagues fully intended to obey the minutes silence.
Unfortunately a 14 year old male decided to spit at me and tried to pull my wing mirror of my car. My colleagues had to step in and it wasn't pleasant. However it was just another day at work.
Sorry we couldn't take a minute out of our day OP.

[StealthPolarBear]

I find them odd too but always assumed id be told off for saying it. I have thought about the victims of these attacks regularly since each one. I don't need a minute prescribed to do so.