To think I have failed as a mother?!

[WankStainWasher]

Getting ready to drive my (teenage) DS2 to his part-time job. He's faffing about as usual and I tell him to eat a banana before we go for quick energy.
I get my things together, ready to go, no sign of DS2. I see the downstairs loo door is locked...
"C'mon! What are you doing?!" says I.
"Having a poo." says DS2.
"Aww man, that is really not on! You don't poo in the downstairs loo! That's what your bathroom upstairs if for!"
"Oh well, but I needed a poo." says DS2 - his voice sounding strange.
"Hang on a minute," I say..."Have you got food in your mouth? Are you eating that banana while you're sitting on the loo, having a poo?!?"
"Yeph."
So I really have failed haven't I, if my DS2 thinks it's ok to:
a) Do a number 2 downstairs and stink out the house and
b) Eat while sitting on the loo.

....Oh, and when I got home I saw he'd left the light on...

Aww Sleight
Here have some
Just don't eat it on the loo.

I see I've been beaten to it but I really wanted to call you Beverley Goldberg.

A teenage male multi tasker? U may have won the parenting game

I'm amazed he answered you while he was on the loo! I refuse to speak to anyone when I'm in the bathroom. If you push me you'll get told to fuck off.

He was (ineffectively) trying to multitask. Also, lighten up about the loo thing.

He was trying to do a useful thing by not delaying the poo or the snack, thereby helping to be on time. That's considerate no matter how manky eating on the loo is.
He has a job.
I'd say you have done a great job as a mother, but he is a teenage boys! They are grimbots

He's missing a trick if he doesn't clean his teeth on the bog too - multitasking is the way forward
YABU for having a loo which is a poo free zone. Especially as you were going out, the stink would have dispersed by the time you got. back. He has probably learned about such things in science so extra kudos to your boy I say.