Is it ever reasonable

[FingerLickinSpringChickin]

To acquire a new BFF of the opposite sex (and the same sexual orientation) when already married?

Why does/would your husband moan about it? Because you're going out with a man, or because you're going out at all?

Re sexual attraction, what I mean is I'm aware my friend doesn't look like the back end of a bus. If we were single, maybe I might look at him that way. But there are plenty of men whose good looks I can appreciate without wanting to bed them. There is zero sexual chemistry between my friend and I. He's more like a brother. Although I like him more than my brother!

DH will probably be jealous. But hopefully get over it. After 20+ years together I'm kind of beginning to think maybe that would be his problem, not mine. We were practically children when we got together and so for a long time our relationship was very insular and exclusive. I lost touch with boy friends I had grown up with so as not to make DH feel uncomfortable, and would never have gone out on my own before the issue of needing babysitters gave a handy excuse to do so.

He doesn't make a fuss if I go out with my girlfriends but I'm fairly sure he doesn't like it especially.

I don't think we've had a particularly healthy relationship in the past and now I'm in my 40s I feel like I need to assert my independence.

It's reassuring to know that others have close male friends.

I can't see why anyone would have a problem with this. What would bi people do for friendships if you can't be friends with anyone belonging to the sex you are usually attracted to?

Sorry OP but I can't help but feel you're protesting a bit too much. You're making a very big deal out of something you seem to be insisting isn't a big deal.

How have you become so close tgat you know "too much" about each other without DH knowing about your new best friend?

Is he married,if he was would you invite them both oh it with you and dh? Why not, as you generally come as a pair?

I've been in exactly the same situation. You can justify it all you like but if you have to keep something a secret, it's not right.