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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Would you trust two 5 year olds with this?

54 replies

MadJeffBarn · 03/03/2017 20:16

So we've recently gotten a nice sofa bed for the living room. My 5 year old is desperate for a sleepover now with her friends. She shares a room with her brother and there wasn't really room or comfortable enough makeshift beds before. But it would mean there would be nowhere for me to sleep comfortably downstairs with them. My daughter is sensible for her age and will come to me if there's any problems but the idea of leaving two little ones downstairs makes me a little anxious!

OP posts:

Rhayader · 03/03/2017 21:23

We don't have an upstairs, I don't understand why its an issue :s

blueskyinmarch · 03/03/2017 21:26

My DDs had sleepovers with their friends from a very young age. By 5 they were having regular sleepovers. I would have put them downstairs no problem.

Ellypoo · 03/03/2017 21:26

If you know the parents & child well, I really don't see why not - the living room is surely not that different to a bedroom for sleeping in? Sounds like the kids are very close & know each other (& you them) well.

CheerfulMuddler · 03/03/2017 21:27

Yeah, plenty of children live in flats/bungalows surely?

Seems like an odd thing to worry about to me, but if you are worried, I'd put DS in a travel cot in your room and the friend in with DD in her bedroom.

InTheRedTent · 03/03/2017 21:29

We have a split level house. Our room is downstairs, the kids are upstairs (2 and 4).... we have a baby monitor in the 2 year olds room. The 4 year old knows where we are if she needs us, I can't see the worry about 'downstairs'.

Starlight2345 · 03/03/2017 21:51

My Ds went on his first sleep over at 4. A friend over the road.. I was on call all night.

I wouldn't worry if friend wakes you are a long way away. I know my DS woke and went into my friends bed as his friend was asleep.

So yes I would probably put DS in with you for one night.

MrsRhettButler · 03/03/2017 21:54

Thinking about it, I'd have left dd1 downstairs with a friend at that age so I guess it depends on the kids.

Muddlingalongalone · 03/03/2017 22:12

Completely depends on the friend & your dd.
I have a relatively sensible 5 year old & if she was with 1 friend I'd be 100% comfortable, but with a couple of the others - no way.

Adsss · 03/03/2017 22:15

I live in a bungalow -so what is this mythical downstairs and how does it differ from anywhere else!

AnnieAnoniMouse · 03/03/2017 22:15

What do you think people in single level houses do? Whole swathes of NZ/AUS for example, almost all the houses are single level, some are even 'upside down'.

We are just SO used to sleeping upstairs that it feels unsafe, but it's really not. The little buggers can just as easily go downstairs if they want to. Lock the doors with a key, take the keys with you.

I would get a couple of the disposable bed protectors to put under a normal bed protector too, just in case!

Mention it to your friend, just to make sure she's ok with it. Hey, maybe you'll get lucky & she won't be & she'll do all the sleep overs🤣

They're clearly not to young for a sleep over as they've done it before 🤣

MorningHeavyWeight · 03/03/2017 23:05

I don't see the harm in ds and her friend sleeping downstairs. However, if you are concerned about it then how about settling ds to sleep as usual in his own bed while the girls watch a film or do whatever they would do at that time, then lift ds into your bed when he is asleep so that your dd's bedroom is available for dd and her friend to sleep in. If your bed is too crowded for a good nights sleep with you, dh and ds for one night then either you or dh could sleep on the sofa bed with the other staying in your bed with ds.

Disclaimer: I am saying about having a good night's sleep with my tongue firmly in my cheek, as I am not sure it is possible in the same house as a sleepover at any age beneath 20, & even then would consider sleep unlikely if the company is a novelty!

DixieNormas · 04/03/2017 00:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Ohyesiam · 04/03/2017 00:22

I don't indeed get it. Why is downstairs a problem, and why would you need to be in the same room?
Just pretend you live in a bungalow, then everything would be downstairs.

scottishdiem · 04/03/2017 00:27

Um. What is the problem with a couple of 5 year olds having a sleepover and even doing it somewhere new and fun?

Seriously. The more time I spend on MN, the more I am amazed that my sibling and I made it to adulthood. After all, at 5 I could walk down stairs and even knew where the house keys were (well out of reach for good reason) so a sleepover downstairs wasnt a problem.

BevGoldbergsSister · 04/03/2017 00:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

MadJeffBarn · 04/03/2017 09:46

I don't really understand the comparing to a bungalow... my issue is that we wouldnt be on the same level. I'm not there incase something happens. Irrational, maybe, but that's why Ive asked on here for opinions

OP posts:

shadesofwinter · 04/03/2017 09:50

I'd be perfectly happy doing this with my 5-year old DD and her best friend.

MrsKCastle · 04/03/2017 09:59

Oh dear! My DD2 is 5. Both DDs have their bedrooms 'downstairs' in that they sleep one floor down from DH and I, on the same floor as kitchen etc, although not the ground floor. My DDs have had more than one sleepover with their best friends, with all 4 children 'downstairs'. I had no idea that I was failing as a parent! However, by some miracle no one has come to any harm yet.

OP, it will be fine.

steppemum · 04/03/2017 10:00

well, I am a bit surprised at this thread.

I would be fine with 5 year olds and sleepovers, depending on the child. So ds and dd1 would have been fine, dd2 not as she would not go to sleep when people were around.

We had it quite often as friends families would come to stay, and all kids together in dds' room, while parents took ds room.
We always had to put dd2 in my bed until asleep.

So, if you know your child and they will be fine, why not?
mn is a bit funny about sleepovers, seems like it isn't ok unless they are about 15.

I also don't think it is a problem being downstairs, I would be around (in kitchen or dining room) until they were asleep. If really worried, I might put a baby alarm downstairs in case they woke up.

and I agree with angel. Do not sleep in same room as the kids. That would make me more uncomfortable.

MrsKCastle · 04/03/2017 10:06

I'm confused about the issue with keys and locking the door as well. My girls can both open the front door and I would feel very uncomfortable having it locked so that they couldn't get out- what if there was a fire? (Obviously it is locked from the outside so no one can walk in). When DD1 was about 4 there was an incident at home where she needed to knock on a neighbour's door and get help and she managed very sensibly. My DDs know that they would never open the door without permission except in an emergency.

dowhatnow · 04/03/2017 10:10

Settle ds in his own bed then transfer him to your room when he's asleep?

MellieMGrant · 04/03/2017 10:12

We have loads of sleepovers (ds2 is five) and they usually just camp on the bedroom floor together. Duvet on the floor and blankets to sleep under. Can they do that?

Trifleorbust · 04/03/2017 13:11

angeldelightedme: Why ever not? I wouldn't let my child stay in the home of someone I wouldn't allow to sleep in a room with them. You?

Trifleorbust · 04/03/2017 13:12

OP, I think you should put your DS in with you for a night. Totally reasonable solution.

ijustwannadance · 04/03/2017 13:22

Wouldn't bother me but would depend on the other child. My 5yo is very old headed though. Don't see any difference between her being in her bedroom, that she can just as easily walk out of and go downstairs, or being in the living room.

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