AIBU about my friend's brunch request?

[alexa1789]

Sorry, this is more of a WWYD - I'm new and not sure where else to post!

It was my friend's birthday in December and my gift to her was to take her out for a bottomless brunch somewhere nice. I tried to schedule it in for January but she's doing Dry January. She suggested we do it in late Feb, and that we celebrate both our birthdays then (mine is in March) and I would pay for her and she would pay for me, and that we could go somewhere really fancy.

I'm not sure whether to accept. I'm worried she's just offering because she'd feel awkward me paying for the whole thing, even though it was my idea (she's quite money conscious). She's a really lovely friend that way, but I intended it to just be a treat for her rather than her paying for half.

I'm also aware I don't want to be insulting or patronising by refusing, or second guessing her reason for wanting to pay for me.

I feel like I'm worrying about nothing, and it's probably a straightforward case of a good friend making a lovely gesture, but was just wondering how others would respond?

[diddl]

I get you, Op.

You wanted to treat her to brunch & she's just turned it into going out for a meal.

I guess you were hoping that you could do something else for your birthday?

Not only that, she's changed what was supposed to be your gift to her by suggesting going somewhere else.

I can't see the point in just refusing, but you could perhaps say that ypu'd like to go to the place that you suggested?

[diddl]

Do you think that she might not want one with so much alcohol on offer having just done dry January?

[Ragwort]

?

I think you are over-thinking it, just go out and have a good time.

[JoyLibs]

I would personally find it strange to go halves on a joint birthday brunch, but perhaps as someone suggested above, she might not have the money to take you out separately for your birthday. If she orders for herself, even at a really fancy place, she can cut down costs how she likes.

Additionally (though I know that you know her far more well than I do), this may just be the kind of present she likes: a fancy meal with someone whose company she enjoys. For one of my friend's birthday this year, I organized her birthday dinner at a fancy restaurant and bought her an expensive cake (didn't like any of the restaurant dessert options so opted to order my own). It doesn't sound like much, but sometimes, good company is all you're looking for! You know her better than I do though.

[alexa1789]

Wow, so many responses! Thank you all.

I think on balance it's best to accept. I think the reason I was unsure whether to accept her offer was because she tends to be money-conscious and I wouldn't want her to feel obliged to pay - but that's the same reason I wouldn't want her to feel she has to take me to a separate brunch on my birthday!

We've been good friends for over 10 years and don't see each other that regularly so will just be nice to spend quality time together (and get a little bit tipsy) - thank you all for your advice!