to think MNHQ should know better than to feature photos of babies in headbands (preumably to denote female) on this site?

[bibbitybobbityyhat]

Of all places!

Come on HQ. Pull your finger out!

[WankersHacksandThieves]

Just becausecyouve ignored my question about whether any girls you have have long hair and wear dresses so I wondered if you only had boys?

[Alfieisnoisy]

FFS OP, there are babies DYING in Aleppo and other parts of the world and your big issue is babies in headbands. Yeah...a massive issue.

Get a grip.and use your energy in something that actually matters.

[brasty]

Totally agree OP.

[bibbitybobbityyhat]

Sorry I didn't see your question about my dd. She does have long hair but only owns one skirt. She prefers trousers. As it turns out she is not a girly girl and hardly wears makeup or jewellery. She goes to a great all girls school where they have lessons about feminism and women's rights. As you can imagine I'm very pleased about that!

[Man10]

we don't need a sign that a child is female

I bet for every one mother who feels this way there are ten who won't like it if you get the sex of their baby wrong.

[HelenF350]

Sorry, I'm actually having a good morning but see that post came over as a bit ott. I am lacking in sleep due to teething baby though so please excuse me.

[WankersHacksandThieves]

My sons go to a mixed school and also have lessons about feminism and women's rights.

Anyway, I think you are being ridiculous about this headband thing. You clearly don't think that everyone should be gender neutral so why should you expect it for babies? When I see a baby In a headband, all I think is that I don't really like headbands. Whether people assume that the baby is a boy or a girl really doesn't matter as most people do not dress their babies or children neutral, the headband is of no significance and actually you are the one that is assuming that the other babies are boys.

[PigletWasPoohsFriend]

She goes to a great all girls school where they have lessons about feminism and women's rights.

As do my DSC at a mixed school. Not sure what arranging a girls only school has anything to do with it tbh.

[AliceInUnderpants]

bibbity there is so much gender stereotyping in your latest post, can't you see that?

[VladmirsPoutine]

As it turns out she is not a girly girl and hardly wears makeup or jewellery.

Thank heavens for that! You must be very proud!

[LiviaDrusillaAugusta]

The irony of the OP accusing someone else of 'having a bad morning' when the poster wasn't the one who decided to try to have a go at MN for using a particular stock photo

[bibbitybobbityyhat]

There's ways of having a go isn't there though Livia. I just thought Helen's "Ffs" "don't give a flying fuck" and "get the hell over it" were slightly ott when she merely disagrees with me. If we'd been arguing for pages over it then I might understand the vitriol a bit more. But this is Aibu and people love to lay it on thick don't they Alfieisnoisy ? Antway, Helen has apologised for being a bit tetchy... teething babies are not fun!

[LiviaDrusillaAugusta]

What about the fact you yourself are gender stereotyping? There seems to be a fair few people on here of that opinion...

[kali110]

livia yes! It's hilarious that op herself is stereotyping

[TiggyD]

Those 2 babies in the photo with headbands are obviously tennis players. How does the OP think we're going to have another British Wimbledon champion if they're not allowed to practise early?!

[MeetMeAtMidnight]

So, your daughter dresses to please herself, OP? And presumably, before she was old enough to express a preference, she was dressed to please you. Why are you trying to deny other parents the same right you had?

Why is it so wrong to dress girl babies in a way that 'denotes female'? You fear the baby will be oppressed or discriminated against in some way if it's known she's female? So we have to hide being female instead of addressing the actual oppression or discrimination?

Well, that kinda sucks, since I thought the whole point of feminism was that we could embrace our femaleness, do what we want, be what we want and, indeed, wear what we want without having to obscure the fact we are female. Headbands on bald girl babies aren't the real issue. By making our issues about headbands or bows or flowers or pink we trivialise the real issues and make them and ourselves look ridiculous.

Isn't it kind of the baby equivalent of 'slut shaming', when we insist people obscure or neutralise their child's sex for fear of sending the 'wrong' message? Especially when the message appears to be it's wrong to look like a girl baby. It seems to me that restricting choice the way you would have it is what is problematic here not headbands on bald girl babies.

[WankersHacksandThieves]

Yes OP, do you have other children (also knowns a s boys) and they go to a gender specific school too or is it only girls that need to be separated and learn different things?

Just to add, I have no views either way on how or where other people educate their children, just wondered if this is yet another double standard. And one which if anything is concerned with emphasising the differences between boys and girls. Ime most gender specific schools are private and most private schools have strict uniforms which are gender specific.

[BeyondIBringYouGoodTidings]

I certainly hope the photographer asked the baby how they identified before putting headbands on them...

[LiviaDrusillaAugusta]

Perhaps the OP has brought her child up as gender neutral? No? Thought not...

Still you should disown her for wearing a skirt and having long hair - presumably she shouldn't be able to show she's female...

[LiviaDrusillaAugusta]

Beyond

[LiviaDrusillaAugusta]

Perhaps you should email MNHQ to express your horror and disgust?

[BeyondIBringYouGoodTidings]

Btw personally I didn't like the photo as I don't like headbands. They always gave me a headache, so I don't like the idea of putting them on babies who can't tell you if they do. And that's without going into the stereotyping.

YABU to be surprised though op. Have you seen the stock photos under the topic headings?!

[BeyondIBringYouGoodTidings]

This one has always been a favourite of MNers...

[kali110]

I'm guessing if the it was clear the baby was a boy but was wearing a headband, all would be well.

[amispartacus]

mispartacus, my son is getting a dark blue/black bike with Avengers stickers on it for Christmas. Because he's like a new bike and he loves the Avengers. I have seen bikes in all the colours of the rainbow, so what's wrong with having one with action figures on for those that want one? If you don't like it, don't buy it, but some of us want yo

Nothing is wrong with buying bikes with action figures on. Nothing at all.

But...why are bikes and toys marketed as showing boys doing action stuff, outdoor stuff etc - and covered in blue whilst other toys depict girls doing housework stuff and covered in pink.

There is NOTHING wrong with buying this stuff for your child. But what messages are the manufacturers and advertisers sending out to the children?

Are they trying subconsciously to say girls - this stuff is for you, it's house stuff, taking care of people and we've done in it in pink - a colour that is definitely linked to girls?

And boys - you like blue? We know because it's the message you get. We have all these lovely action toys for you. Doing stuff. Physical stuff. Man stuff. Be like your Dad. Don't have the iron. That's for girls. Look, it's in pink and there's a girl doing it. If you want that, your friends will think you're a girl.

There's nothing wrong with buying the stuff for your children. But it's a clear message from the manufacturers that some things are only for boys and some things are only for girls. It's a rare boy who wants something that is marketed for girls.