To consider not cooking the full works for Christmas Day?

[SouthernNorthernGirl]

I love a Christmas dinner, I'm just not sure I want to do it this year.
I'm thinking about putting out delicious food, buffet style. Pigs in blanket, Yorkshire pudding with smoked mackerel pate, cheese board, nuts, twiglet's, matchmakers etc etc, and being done with it.
DH is horrified at this
AIBU?

[Holldstock1]

Hi, I fully understand you not wanting to do a traditional Christmas Dinner with the full works. I think you need to sit down and have a proper chat with the family. If they want to have a full on Christmas dinner then tell them that they need to realistically plan it, shop for it and cook it from scratch.

Just tell them that you need a complete break from doing it this year and that unless they do want the buffet you suggested then they need to sort the arrangements as you won't be doing it.

They just don't realize how much work there is because you've obviously done it all for them before.

I think you are going through Christmas Dinner fatigue. I have a similar issue myself atm abit like yours but for slightly different (and self inflicted) reasons.

Apologies if we sound over the top but we are definitely foodies, my kids have been brought up growing alot of our own fruit and veg, collecting eggs from the hens, and trying and eating lots of different things from a very young age so they are very adventurous and eat most things.

And they've grown up with me cooking most things for Christmas and New Year from scratch, so that's homemade mincemeat & mince pies, Christmas pudding and cake, buffet food, stollen, homemade stilton and walnut biscuits, shortbread, lots of deserts, icecream, port & cranberry sauce, stuffing, marmalades and chutneys and pickled shallots and beetroot, pickled pears, the list could go on.... yep you name it I've probably done it. But I do enjoy cooking especially unusual things provided I'm not being forced to do it.

I obviously didn't start off immediately doing all that, it gradually crept up over the years whilst I was a SAHM and because family and friends enjoyed it, it became the expected norm. Same with actual Christmas Day although we've never been a turkey family - not keen - prefer Duck or if visitors Goose.

Well last 6 years we've had visitors who now expect the full Christmas thing completely homemade, and turn up their nose if I try any shortcuts - 'Oh when you said Steak and Kidney pie I thought it was one you'd made, oh you bought a ready cooked gammon.....' But of course I'm now working and am doing that even when they come and stay for a week or week & half over Christmas (I also normally work Christmas Day, Boxing Day and New Years), so I have alot less time. Its gotten to the stage that every year I was having to start preparing things and freezing meals for their stay in September - I kid you not! They are also traditional and picky eaters so no rice or pasta, lots of roast dinners, casseroles and pies all time consuming things to cook.

It had gotten to the stage that although I loved seeing them, and enjoyed some of the cooking, I was dreading every Christmas as I'd end up slaving in the kitchen and feel exhausted by the time the end of their stay. Even where other members in the family would help out with some food prep for the big day, I would spend most of the time trapped in the kitchen cooking, washing up etc etc.

Anyway this year we can't have visitors due to certain things that have happened in the house. Nothing drastic, but enough to mean we physically can't have anyone staying as most of our downstairs is not liveable.

I basically said to the family that I wanted to do an easy Christmas and New Year. I don't want alot of hassle.

I did initially say that I wanted to eat out Christmas Day, but the prices are stupidly rip off expensive, when I know for a fraction of the cost for a family of four eating a bulk standard turkey dinner down the pub, we will be able to eat a really knock out meal cooked at home. So its going to be things that the family wanted to have other years but couldn't because of our visitors. And the family are going to cook it completely this year.

I've also said I am absolutely not doing any of the preparatory cooking. So the pudding is one I did last year (always end up doing 2 at same time), but not making a cake and icing it, no mince pies, biscuits - etc etc. I've bought a Panetone and a stollen, and if they want anything else then its going to be a Tescos job. I will not make a single dessert or mince pie.

And I'm doing to thoroughly enjoy being completely lazy when I get home from work on Christmas Day and the only thing I'll be looking to lift is a glass of wine!

So OP I would seriously say to you, go on strike. Tell your family that you have Christmas Dinner Fatigue, and that they are welcome to do the traditional Christmas Dinner if they do all the cooking! Otherwise its your buffet (but I agree with other people that a buffet can also be quite labour intensive.

Good luck!

[Thefishewife]

There would be a uprising in my house but then again I don't cook the christams dinner 😬

[CoughingForWeeks]

I really fancy mackerel pate now :)

[MyVisionsComeFromSoup]

we're not having Christmas lunch this year - for the first year ever it's just going to to be us and (some of) the DC. Turns out no-one other than DH is really fussed about turkey or chicken, it's actually all the other bits they like, so Christmas Day will be a big brunch around 11ish, then from 4 onwards buffet style nibbles, with everyone chipping in to unwrap/heat up/plate. Loads of board games, Dr Who and Strictly, and plenty of fizz.

The Boxing Day (or if we end up having to have relatives on Christmas Day) it will be a pre-prepared and frozen in advance fancy sausage plait, with roast potatoes, pigs in blankets, Yorkshire puddings and brussels with chestnuts. And plenty of fizz.

I'm fed up with having to work to someone else's timetable or deal with MILs "interesting" ideas about cooking the turkey the night before and wafting broccoli over a pan of hot water and calling it cooked so this year I've put my foot down and declared that as I'm not well, anything else will be too difficult for me to manage .

[gotthemoononastick]

Everything tearsofrobertsmith said!Also lovely leftovers for days!

[tearsofrobertsmith]

Put out a buffet once instead of a Christmas dinner, was rubbish!!!!!!!! Was honestly more work than you think. Compared to digging out serving plates, slicing stuff, heating up some stuff, putting other stuff in bowls, taking lids off stuff, putting it all through on the table which left no room for anyone to sit down so we were all over couches with plates perched on knees, then putting it all away, spending ages wrapping the leftovers and finding space in the fridge- Christmas dinner is a breeze!
At the time I was annoyed, I was pregnant and this was meant to be labour saving, nobody enjoyed it in the same way as a traditional dinner which DH and I prep and cook together. So much easier to cook the meat two days before if you can, make the gravy, slice and store the meat in fridge in said gravy, day before, prep any fresh veg and heat it all through with a combo of frozen other bit and pieces on the big day. I couldn't stop imagining Christmas dinner for weeks after, really missed it!! It's honestly easier just to make it normally than faff about with buffets!

[HamsterTastic]

Of course you aren't unreasonable to not want to work on Christmas Day

Dh is welcome to make xmas dinner surely?

[IAmAmy]

If the husband is horrified why doesn't he cook it? Why should the responsibility for cooking ever be the woman's? When I'm an adult Christmas will be for drinking mulled wine from morning, if any future husband of mine wants a Christmas dinner he can cook it.

[GeekyWombat]

We had roast pork last year, just the same as a standard Sunday roast (albeit with paxo balls and crackers on the table). I don't know if it's just because otherwise we only cook turkey once a year, or if it was the size of the joint or what but it was much less faff, really tasty and seemed less stressful all round. Plus, crackling!

[babayjane67]

I always cook the full Christmas lunch.Turkey& all the trimmings.I have said about eating out before for a change but dp is never keen always says it's never gonna be as good as yrs love.plus I know it is extortionate!! Last yr for first time I did all the veg bout a wk before then put it stright in freezer.also made the sausagemeat stuffing balls that dp loves Christmas eve&kept them in fridge.I will do that again this yr.I do hm roast spuds but do frozen roast parsnips& pigs which we do bout 3 pks of as again dp loves em!we all do to be fair! I cook it all& he washes wipes it all up!!
Will be just the 3 of us & my mum prob this yr.

[nurseinwonderland]

YANBU
We had steak last year. Had lots of lego to build so it was perfect. Had a full roast on boxing day.
Only thing I missed was the smell of the turkey cooking Christmas morning

[mummytime]

Last year I survey the family and we came up with a menu of what people really wanted to eat. None of us really like a turkey dinner and the only one to complain was my fussy DD who really doesn't look me roasts. I wouldn't say it was easier but everyone got something they like.
I'll probably do the same this year.

[anonymousbird]

I've cooked 15 "full works" Christmas dinners in a row. No one has ever invited me to their house for Christmas dinner and I just want a break this year!

That said I do like being in my own home on Christmas Day so this year I am getting it all prepped from Waitrose Entertaining and I can't flipping wait.

[amusedbush]

We have had Christmas Day just the two of us for the past four years. I always run myself ragged cooking the works for us but DH has blessedly asked for a buffet style meal. So long as there's baked camembert and crusty bread I'm happy

We'll get the full dinner with the bonus of my dad's trifle when we go to my parents' house a couple of days later anyway so we won't miss out.

[DudeWheresMyVulva]

I am really looking forward to Christmas dinner this year. The past few years we have had extended family stay, and there was a certain amount of rigidity on timings and activities etc. (3 courses served at 1 pm on the dot. No leftovers acceptable on Boxing day. Not to much noise from Dcs as afternoon naps for the older generation in the sitting room are required).

We are having goose. And loads of fizz starting early. And tons of movies, and walks.

[AutumnMadness]

I really don't get all this angst about the Christmas dinner. Sorry, everyone, but traditional British Christmas dinner is a bit of a sorry affair. It's exactly the same as all other British traditional dinners - overcooked meat, overboiled veg and triple-carbing on three different kinds of potatoes - just a bit bigger. Really, what is there to do? The most time consuming thing is to peel veg. Peel them the day before while watching telly and then bung them in boiling water in pots. Bung the turkey in the oven. According to tradition, you do not need to actually do anything with it but perhaps stuff it with shop-bought stuffing. Boil the potatoes and then put them in fryer/oven. Job done. Buy gravy, cranberry sauce and Christmas pudding in the supermarket. All in all, this will take two hours max. It will be more time-consuming to set the table.

[BabyGanoush]

Let DH cook, or at eats help.

I'm doing a Christmas dinner because I think it's easy. I am not going overboard on "all the trimmings" though.

starter: smoked salmon on shop bough blinis, dollop of sour cream

Butcher's boned, stuffed, rolled Turkey. put in oven for 3 hours.
Roast potatoes from frozen (goosefatty ones)
boiled veg like sprouts/carrots/broccoli,
gravy bought ready made
pigs in blankets bought ready made, just heat up

Lots of fizz

This always works fine, people like a big plate of food, and nobody apart from MIL cares that the roasties are from a bag and there are no chestnuts or parsnips. If I give her enough fizz and Baileys she forgives me anyway

[YouMakeMyDreams]

We don't have a traditional sit down Christmas dinner either. We do have one during our time off usually we have visitors at some point and I cook it then. We do a buffet in the afternoon of lots of our favourite things. Dc love it dh and I can do it together and I get a lot done the day before.
None of us are that bothered about the big sit down meal thing and quite like our relaxed day and I'm the only one that can cook a big meal like that so it always fell to me.
We don't feel cheated and we always have lots of lovely things we wouldn't have just every day. it's our Christmas and we are happy making good our own traditions.

[BertrandRussell]

Jamie smoked trout and Yorkshire puddings

[YelloDraw]

YUM! Yorkshire pud and smoked mackeral pate sounds delish.

[Frouby]

I do a cheats Christmas dinner on Christmas day. Turkey crown, all the trimmings but bought in. Usually from marks and Spencer. Everything including the gravy. It's just a case of working the timings out then!

We usually have prawn cocktail starter because dp loves it, main dinner and then some fancy pants cheesecake or something for pudding.

Then NYD I do a full dinner and we have guests. Christmas day is just us. Even if we had guests I would still do the same though.

[gotthemoononastick]

Do not even think of it OP.I did a cold, trendy 70's buffet only once a hundred years ago in a boiling hot country.

My family and DH especially still bleats about the '" cold not proper Christmas dinner when there were no roast potatoes"'!

[BertrandRussell]

That Jamie recipe with Yorkshire puddings, smoked trout and horseradish is one of my absolute favourite things. I want it now!

But you couldn't do it for a buffet- the puddings need to be straight out of the oven and too hot to touch...........

[Graphista]

It's just me and daughter (currently wondering if my first post was invisible)

I'm veggie daughter isn't.

Daughter usually has a gammon steak, I have quorn fillets, ready prepped fresh carrots and parsnips which I drizzle honey over to roast, frozen roast pots n yorkies, ready made pigs in blankets for daughter (the rest get eaten Boxing Day), quorn chipolatas for me, paxo made up as stuffing balls (daughters job), jar cranberry sauce, gravy from granules, job done! Tastes fine, easy to do. Fruit for starter, Christmas pud for me (wee micro job) daughter prefers ice cream so as a treat she gets whatever posh one on offer she fancies.

Boxing Day, fry up for brekkie (daughter likes doing this as she can then get away with giving herself stupid amounts of bacon!), homemade soup for lunch with nice bread, snacking through the day (chips n dip, pretzels, olives, pigs for dd, leftover stuffing balls, pickles, cranberry sauce, sausage rolls, deli slices etc)

[Bluebolt]

We have desert in the evening usually doctor who, not after Christmas dinner so no evening cooking.