AIBU to dread dd's party! (Ideas please!)

[Italiangreyhound]

My dd is not far off becoming a teenager and another mile stone will be reached this year (12); plus for the first time would like a few boys at her birthday party.

All well and good and I was all up for a bowling party, or swim party or some sort of cinema thing.

But she wants the party at home, doesn't want karakoe and I am now wracking my brains about what the group will do!

I am not trying to be sexist but if it were all girls we could have a pamper evening or craft or jewellery making. I am well aware somewhere not too far away there may be boys who would love all of this but it is unlikely to be dd's male friends!

I've really tried to push her on the cinema thing but she is adamant she does not want it.

Looked up paint balling and Lazar today but it is very expensive. Especially for the number she wants. She is quite shy so i really had hoped her party would be a chance to meet old friends and a few new ones. But as she wants it in our reasonably modest/average home that is going to limit it.

We are looking at about 12 12-year olds!

If it was summer I might go for this in the garden www.groupon.com/deals/the-hawaii-party-rentals-honolulu (no we are not in Hawaii and autumn is cold, so the garden is out!)

Last year it was a sleep over for half that number and it totally exhausted me.

Any ideas, please? I don't feel I am being unreasonable to feel daunted by this task and really it is the first birthday I've really felt such trepidation about!

[ShowMeTheElf]

Photo booth is an excellent idea! I'm stealing that for next year!

[Italiangreyhound]

Such really excellent ideas.thank you.

[Ilovehamabeads]

Dd and her friend had a party recently where they made a huge cardboard photo frame (boxes from the supermarket, cut to shape and stuck together and covered in shiny paper). They went to a few £1 shops and bought props - glasses, wigs, hats etc, and had a photo booth party. Said it was great fun, they are 11 and 12 and there were lots of boys there too who enjoyed it.

[Optimist3]

My 14 year old we did fire pit, they cooked and ran round madly getting covered in mud. Great fun.

[wonderingagain21]

We had a mocktails & canapés party I did a quick demo of four different mocktails & kid friendly canapés. - the kids all took it in turns to try & reproduce the different bits & then swapped over so they all got to make everything. They then got to eat it all. They had lots of fun, it was quite cheap, indoor & felt v grown up.

[OutDamnedWind]

Red Soli cups

[Italiangreyhound]

What are red solo cups?

[9troubledwaters]

Also looking for a really funny film for 11/12 year olds?

[Thefishewife]

Pizza making party

You can buy the bases let them do a production line of veg Ect then DVD somthing cheesy and romantic is always good may be somthing old they wouldn't have herd of and then mocktails in plastic wine glasses

[9troubledwaters]

Red solo cups?

Murder mystery sounds brill, can anyone link to a game or supplies theyve used?

[Italiangreyhound]

You all sound very good parents and very dedicated to giving your kids a great party.

I just wish dd would be doing to do something outside the home!

Maybe I am bring unreasonable to dread it, but I really do!

[OutDamnedWind]

You could also get some of the Beanboozled jelly beans (the Ines with flavours like vomit and smelly socks)

[ShowMeTheElf]

At 12 one of mine went to the cinema and Frankie and Benny's with a few friends. The table was prebooked, they ordered from the teens menu and had a little leeway too order additional chips etc. it was the independent eating out that made it special.
The other had a hot tub in the garden for the weekend under a gazebo. 2 parties of 6 kids over the weekend. cold drinks, hot drinks and snacks/meals provided at intervals. Piles of warm towels too (it was a chilly weekend). I hardly saw them.
At 12 it's about seeming to be grown up and independent rather than actually being grown up and independent IYSWIM, so you need to guide without actually being significantly involved.
I think that crafts might work with a mixed group but you might need to think through a theme more to link everything together: Harry Potter theme? They are 11/12 so need an element of independent 'hanging out' but you still need to direct them a bit. It could be amazing and not to onerous if you can get everything set up and leave them to it: wizard games/crafts, a film, lego Harry Potter computer game etc so they can drift between and do nothing it they want.!

[OutDamnedWind]

Or if you really want to win at parties, get the red solo cups for drinks.

[legspinner]

Someone's already suggested this, but for my DDs 12th the children had a bake off. Had to find a recipe, buy stuff (basics provided), walk to supermarket 15 mins away, come back and bake up a storm. You do need a big space to do that though and it is VERY messy. DH was a judge. Worked really well.

[Wingdingingit]

Photobooth set up somewhere with props for selfies.
Order a massive stack of Pizza
Soft drinks in grown up type glasses
Icecream tubs with a variation of toppings laid out
Stack of board games or Xbox dance type thing
Bottle flipping
Soft drink beer pong
Selection of dvds
Bean bags and throws in front room
Snacks around the front room
Most importantly do not helicopter toooo much. Let them help themselves. You could sit in kitchen casually reading a mag to oversee. ..A nonchalant hello when they are helping themselves. Tell them to relax and make themselves at home. You will win at the tween party.

[Misspollyhadadolly88]

What about a murder mystery?

[Helpisathand13]

I hope you settle on an idea but just to add, if pizza a thought sainsburys do stonebaked pizza baes 2 for £1.50, with a smattering of passata. Buy enough for half each and selection of topping, jar of tomato pasta sauce. Let them create their own and bake. My DS did this recently with his teenage mates, all loved, got what they wanted and no waste! As for games a teen version of pass the parcel is good, wrap nice stuff interwoven with forfeits. Trick or treat pass the parcel! If you like DD could design, or at the party the guests write their own and someone does the wrap, that way they aren't too bad because they know the writer may get their own! Silly stuff like tongue twisters, sing a song, alphabet backwards or include something false moustache to wear, face paints to 'do someone up'. Just fun stuff. Good luck and try to relax and see party as fun and focus on creating a great time for DD. She will appreciate it and so will get friends. X

[Italiangreyhound]

Can anyone say from experience, when you have left a dozen 12 year olds to eat pizza, drink coke and watch a movie, have they had fun, was that enough?

DD did this last year and had a sleep over, it was the hardest birthday party we have ever had. I am really reluctant to repeat it, but maybe it was the sleepover element that made it so hard, there are only so many times you can say "Calm down, girls, and go to sleep!"

[Italiangreyhound]

Dontpanicpyke -re - "You are totally overthinking it." Has been known to happen, but on this occasion I think not!

My fear is the kids will be bored and the party will not go well, this would be very difficult for dd. She is not a natural social person, quite s, quirky, autistic tendencies, and I feel responsible if she gets 12 people to the house that things will go well. So 'leaving them to it' is not really on my radar.

We've done go-kharting (that was the best party ever, the most expensive but the easiest!

Iguessyourestuckwithme re "Could you not do an outside party - 2 hours of sitting outside around a campfire - jacket potatoes and chilli, then roasting marshmallows and smores. Have sparklers etc" Lovely idea.

OutDamnedWind re "Takeaway pizza, iPod and plenty of coke as others have said. Ice cream and lots of topping/sauces. Something like twister on standby." Sounds good.

Middle - Re 'console' ?? We have a TV and a PC in the same room.

I am afraid I am with Dontpanicpyke re "I wouldn't be lighting camp fires etc as you don't want that responsibility and most 12 year olds don't want mummy hosting a party. I am a total fire-phobe! I burnt myself heating sweet corn the other day. Plus it might rain, it does seem to do that a lot in autumn.

[Dontpanicpyke]

I wouldn't be lighting camp fires etc as you don't want that responsibility and most 12 year olds don't want mummy hosting a party.

Trust me pizza, drinks, movie and consol and iPod music played loudly.

[ginorwine]

I'd go for make own pizza and film
Or fire pit and music outside .

[MiddleClassProblem]

I think I'd just throw on a movie, move out any excess furniture, get popcorn and snacks, order a few pizzas (for some reason more exciting than home cooked but obviously don't do unless you can afford to) and leave them to it to a degree. If you have a console, all the better. If you have a second tv you can move into the room so the console is on one and a movie is on the other, even better.

[OutDamnedWind]

Takeaway pizza, iPod and plenty of coke as others have said. Ice cream and lots of topping/sauces. Something like twister on standby.

[Iguessyourestuckwithme]

Could you not do an outside party - 2 hours of sitting outside around a campfire - jacket potatoes and chilli, then roasting marshmallows and smores. Have sparklers etc