AIBU to think there is too much pressure and expectations put on infant school children

[BazilGin]

This may be a huge cultural difference that I will never get over. I started primary school at the age of 7. I move to the UK 10 years ago and my August born daughter started reception just after her 4th birthday. This in itself is wrong, but I am honestly shocked at the curriculum the teachers have to follow. She has just started year one and is given spellings every week that the teacher tests on Monday morning. AIBU to think this is too much too soon? She is doing well academically, but said she is sad they are not allowed to play and "in the morning it's literacy and we just have to get on with it". At this age I though they are just learning through play! Clearly not !! I honestly believed that infant school will be more play based, but they were doing lots of writing/ready ng etc even in reception. DD went to a wonderful Montessori preschool and somehow I thought that infant school will be just extension of that, sadly not. I wish the whole system was different. If my circumstances were different, I would home school as it breaks my heart.

[Bobochic]

With the benefit of hindsight I am glad my DD did three years of French maternelle from 3 to 6 where academics were introduced very slowly. She was a bit bored sometimes (but this could have been remedied with more singing and dancing and acting and sport, not more literacy/numeracy) but there was no pressure and now, at 11, she is fatastically good at reading and writing. There's no need to start DC before they are ready.

[Spudlet]

Another mum to a tiddler here (8 months) worried about the future of his education. The amount of homework DH's nephew gets landed with is ridiculous - he's 8 and I'm sure he's doing more than I did at 12 or 13.

[ChickenSalad]

I've noticed a big jump between Y2 and Y3 for DD2 - post new KS2 curriculum. For DD1 a few years ago this wasn't so noticeable, the change in expectations was more gradual.

[Verbena37]

That sounds strange to me for a state primary.
They are more interested in how the kids make marks on different materials and normally, they can choose how to do that....doesn't have to be with a pencil....could just be a finger in the air I thought.

I know that they normally have frequent key words to learn before moving onto simple reading books. I think I'd mention your worry to the teacher and ask her why they're testing I reception.

Legally, your DD doesn't even have to be in school until August next year when she turns five.

[TooManyMochas]

Expectations do seem to vary widely! DS has just started Reception and comes home with one book a week. The first one came with a little note from the teacher stressing that we should do as much or as little as the child felt comfortable with. It also seems very play-based - lots of 'welly walks', painting and 'choosing time'. I know this is very early days so it may change, but we deliberately picked the school because it has a strong reputation locally for being a small, friendly school that children actually enjoy going to. Yet its undersubscribed even with an OFSTED 'good' rating (not at all unusual round here - its the north-east so not as much pressure on places) whereas the town's famously high pressure OFSTED 'outstanding' school is RAMMED. We need to vote with our feet if things are to change.

[Lalal00p5y]

Please sign the petition.
you.38degrees.org.uk/petitions/parents-support-sats-boycott-kids-strike-3rd-may

[user1470041360]

Yanbu . My 6 yr old gets spellings, maths and reading homework. We do the reading but she only does the rest if she wants to. We will not be bullied into homework. I want her to enjoy learning with no pressure

[baxterstockman]

Well of course money has something to do with home schooling. My husband and I both need to work to pay our mortgage, bills and various outgoings. If I were to quit my job and home school the children, we would lose our home. So not really an option.

[pfrench]

I don't think it matter whether the banners in a classroom are from Twinkl. Would you rather a teacher spent time cutting out, laminating then cutting out letters, or planning engaging lessons for their classes? Take a look at the work around the banners.

[skorpion]

I fully agree. I went to school at 7 and the whole system then was that you attended the school that was closest to where you live, nobody talked about the performance of the school you went to. The rankings by results were not introduced until the secondary level - from 15 to 18 years old - and you just had to pass entry exams to the high school of your choice, so you prepared for those in the last year of primary.
I am not saying all primary schools were brilliant and offered an equally brilliant level of education, but I certainly never experienced the stress and pressure of testing to compare the schools on a regional or national level. And I believe the overall level of education then was higher and offering a more in depth knowledge of a subject (if one was interested, that is ). My nearly 7 year old has been rehashing number bonds to 10 for about six months. I am not saying that she should be studying Pythagoras by now, but surely there is so much other stuff that can be done at this young age to get children fascinated by maths, no?
I am quite shocked at the level of testing in primary schools here. I feel sorry for the teachers and the children, too. I always believed that you need to be full of passion to teach, but this system is a sure way to kill that, isn't it?

[MrEBear]

A Genie
The system north of the border isn't much better. National tests are about to be reintroduced. The aim doesn't appear to be to raise standards - just close the attainment gap - between the kids who's parents push and the kids who's parents don't. There also seems to be a hidden agenda to turn every kid into a Nationalist. The exam system was changed 3 years ago and they are talking about changing it again today.

[MrEBear]

The only thing that really is any better is our kids are 4&6mths before starting school and the youngest have a right to defer without any issues or threats of having to skip years.

[QueenLizIII]

There is another thread on here about a young boy moving down reading grades following summer and she is talking of bringing in a tutor.....!

I honestly think many mothers love this push push push and really wouldnt want their DC behind the next child.

One of my friends banned Teletubbies at 2-3 as it teaches them nothing. I asked her if everything they do has to teach them something

[GColdtimer]

YANBU

Dd2 has just stared tear 2 and has it much harder than dd1. Makes me so sad - she said today "we have 6 whole hours at school, no talking, no playing" (maybe a tad exaggerated but it's how she feels). She goes absolutely barmy when she gets home and her behaviour has been trying, it's like she lets it all go when she comes out of school.

And don't get me started on spellings - today she had "cygnet" and "gymnast". She is 6 ffs.

[ArnoldRimmerBSc]

YABU my son is the opposite. He really didn't enjoy preschool or reception but loved school from Year 1 when it became more formal. He is in Year 4 now and still loves it.

My daughter loves school too, she also loves to play. School is only from 8.45 am until 3 pm there is plenty of time to play (including break times) plus all the long holidays.

[swissy56]

It's crap. DD left year 4 with the teacher telling her she had written the best piece of work she had ever seen from a year 4 child.
She then moves into Year 5 the teacher moves her down a couple of sets and says she is struggling but the work is hard now and to be expected. DD is totally disillusioned says she's rubbish at literacy and I haven't seen her write a story for a year now. How can a child excell in year 4 but then bottom out 2 months later!!

[ollieplimsoles]

I have a friend who works in a nursery school, her class is made up of two-three year olds.

She showed me a template letter they send out to parents when they feel that they must 'try harder' (its actually says that in the letter) when a child isn't picking something up at school... At TWO years of age.

She sent one out recently because a three year old girl couldn't wrote the full version of her name, only the shortened version.

I just couldn't believe it, I realise that sine children enjoy it but its not fair that every child has to fit in to the same little box.

[Ohmuther]

YANBU.
Primary schools in this country are an absolute bloody disgrace and the blame should be laid at the feet of the politicians. Poor teachers, poor children and in the future poor mental health services who have to pick up the pieces of Gove and Morgan's social experimentation flying in the face of all the education research and evidence. I have an 8 year old and I am sick and tired of the pressure and misery the school system is causing. Our Education system should be about nurturing and encouraging our children to grow into the best versions of themselves, valuing them as members of their communities and society - instead they are conditioned like Pavlov's dogs to jump through a series of stupid hoops - a lot of the year 4 curriculum is complete nonsense and some of the grammar is incorrect (sentences you are allowed to end in an exclamation mark for example). Our children are tested and scrutinised from the earliest age and it stinks. It is anti-educational, anti-social bullshit.

[Gingercat86]

I'm the same, my DS has just started Yr1 & doesn't want to go in the mornings because of 'all the work' I really feel for him & feel like the transition between reception & Yr1 has barely been smooth. They have gone from playing to sitting down at a desk for most of the day it makes me sad that he is only 5 & seems to worry so much about everything, he should enjoy playing & being a child. 😞

[CheerfullyIndifferent]

(Haven't read the full thread yet)
YDNBU! My 7 year old has started Y3 and we have just started bothering with spelling. She's been bringing it home since Y1 but she only did it when/if she wanted to. I never let her not do her homework though because if she didn't, she would have to it during play time.

[CheerfullyIndifferent]

I meant YADNBU, obviously. Missed a letter there

[peppercorns3]

Sadly the government have decided we need to keep up with the academic success of the Far East (Japan, China etc) rather than the life success of the Scandinavians. Im just glad mine are though the infant stage and am determined to keep a balance. Their mental health and sense of life fulfilment are just as important as their academic success ( more, actually 😏)

[PrettyPirate]

Not every school puts pressure on first years. Our one (South East) is lovely, Reception is definitely very play based, Y1 pretty much same. DS in Y3 now and this is first he's getting bit of homework. So far (KS1) it has been just recommended daily reading. With sats in Y2 they didn't even tell kids when they were doing them, I found out after. That's how it should be, I think.

OP, I would have a word with teacher and ask if all this homework is actually needed or set for those parents who demand it.

I also come from a country where I started school aged 7. We are there at the top of PISA but I would never want to send my kids to school in my country. So much stress and hours of homework from year 1, classroom is most formal setting from day one. I have lots of family and friends with various school aged kids and none of them love school. And then I look at my 10 year old DD who cries if she's ill and can't go to school, makes me happy that she's born here and the school is not bad thing after all.

[amyboo]

I totally agree. We live in Belgium and primary school here starts during the year (Jan-Dec) that they turn 6. Prior to that, they do 3-4 years in "maternelle" which is basically an extension of nursery but in a slightly more formal setting. So, they do play and activities structured around different themes, introducing a few letters and numbers very slowly and gently according to the child. Its very play focussed and on the whole it's about getting them comfortable in the school setting, before they start primary.

DS1 has just started Primary 1 at age 6.5 and him and his friends are now so ready to learn that the class are moving along quite quickly with writing and reading. He gets a little homework, but there are no exams or tests (at least for another couple of years). Most importantly there's no grading about whether they're meeting this or that target. Their only aim for the year is to be able to do adding and subtracting with numbers up to 20, and to be able to write their name (joined up) by the end of the school year. The teacher said that some will be comfortable readers by the end of the year, others will need more time and support.

Speaking to friends in the UK, I'm shocked that their kids in year 1 already get reports saying if they're "meeting" "exceeding or "failing to meet" expectations (at the age of 5 FFS!), and am amazed at levels and targets expected of such young kids. I much prefer the system here.

[Memoires]

YANNNNNNNBU. Wait until she gets into secondary and is approaching GCSE and A level....