To ask if it is foolish to think a career doesn't have to stop if you have a baby?

[Workworkwork1]

Been trying to get our ducks in a row. Qualifications tied up, house bought, wedding approaching. We are 24 and 27.

Work is currently holding me back. I work in the NHS and there is this ethos among those who talk about it that you should hit band x before you TTC. Seemingly they think everything will stop and you'll settle there forever.

My background/quals means I am capable of getting to director level (one day!) if I graft. Part of me doesn't want to wait what I think will be 3-4 years from now to hit that band. I'd rather just start TTC sooner and carry on the career battle alongside having a baby or two. I know it might not happen straight off the bat or at all, which is another reason I don't want to hold off...

I know priorities would change/our lives would flip on their head, but am I being completely foolish to think I can still climb the ladder if we TTC in more like 1-2 years, when I am about 4 years in to this career?

Pity, sorry, but that's bollocks. Not only do you not know what I do, but you're overlooking - and insulting - all the other thousands of AHPs, Clinical Directors, Head Nurses, Lead Scientists etc that are on senior grades without doing what you appear to see as 'serving their time'.

Get your head out of your arse, please.

I think you can continue on your career path and have kids, you just have to compromise with the fact that it may take a little longer to get there or you may see less of the kids or may me both.
It just might not happen the way it would if you were to remain child free, i think you will just need to adapt your expectations a little but why not try it and see how it will all fit?

Well I'm an AHP Babysham
Age 48 and band 6 as I'm part time due to being a lone parent and needing flexibility. I was a band 7 prior to having my child but worked for another trust.

I do not know of any Band 8s or 9s in their twenties, and the ones I do know (aged late 30s up) have masters qualifications and/or years and years of experience.

It depends what type of parent you want to be really.

I prioritised being at the school gates and fitting work round the kids not vice versa. No judgement for those choosing the opposite. It's a personal decision and I'm lucky my work is flexible.

Consequently I've stayed at a management level rather than director.

I'm very happy with this decision as is dh and dc.

I think you're extremely naive to think that progression at work is just as easy after children as before.

Not impossible, but harder. On you.

Also people say 'get to band x before TTC' because having more money helps with paying for good childcare to help you continue your career path.

Prancing - that sounds about right. Only this morning I was working with a senior AHP, who manages her own sub-specialty, is a P.I of a research, years of experience; she's a Band 7, in her forties. That's the norm.

I would love to know where all these Head Nurses, AHP's and Lead Scientists in their twenties are?

Certainly not in any trust I've worked in and I've worked in several.

Hence the surprise expressed by quite a few on this thread about it being no big deal.

I wouldn't be so dismissive about the concept of "serving your time", either. Clinical experience may not mean much to you, but it's hugely valuable in ways you seem to struggle to imagine.

I am an 8a AHP with 30 years in various NHS trusts and it would be very difficult for me to progress further unless I took a management role rather than clinical.

There are people who remain clinical above 8a but these jobs are very specialised.

Career impact was massive for me. But, trying to claw something back now DS is lots older. Would echo above with how you may feel after Dc born. You cannot imagine how you may feel after. Pregnancy/birth is not always text book. It may be plain sailing and you may have supportive partner/family/childcare all lined up and be great. Or, you may have a bumpy pregnancy, bumpy birth that takes you time to recover, bumpy child that means you cannot return (or DH) to work at X mths as planned. The younger you are, the better the physical outcome tends to be for you, esp if you want more than one. You won't be able to predict the rest. If DC are important, put that as your goal and see what happens. The rest will fall into place somehow around it.

You got it, no woman ever had a career after having a baby. Thats exactly how it works.

Or not.

Sometimes things don't always go as planned is the message isn't it? Sometimes you have a child who needs much more care. It all changes because before kids it's more or less under your control; after kids there are lots more out of control elements