to give my dc's some school work over the summer holidays

[justalittlelemondrizzle]

My dc's 7 & 8 break up for the summer this week and I've bought them some English and maths work books to do over the holidays.
I usually do print outs of things that have come up on their reports that they have struggled with and set them a fun project.
Most of the summer is going to be about them having fun and enjoying some downtime. They have lots of friends round our area who they enjoy playing with all the time. Is it wrong for me to get them to do some work a few days a week for maybe 45 minutes at a time so they don't slip behind.
They're pretty average. My eldest tries hard and is doing well ut got a working towards in maths on her report and my youngest is very lazy and that did show on her report this year with a few working towards when I know she is capable. Do other people do this or am I being a mean mummy?

[Totalshambles]

Diamond but how does your friend remember her parents?

My kids also write silly stories and read for pleasure I don't get how half an hour maths or English etc is incompatible with that?

It sounds to me as though maybe you do have some sort of a concern or anxiety about being behind at school in your eagerness to show how it hasn't held you back.

This whole 'let them relax thing' is great I agree kids shouldn't work hard through the summer. And no one is talking about sitting them down for hours on end. Half an hour is nothing. You can watch some crap on tv you can't even remember or you can start learning you concepts that help your wider understanding of the world. How is that mean?!?

[ppeatfruit]

It's mean because giving children worksheets anyway is stressful, they're not usually fun or interesting. Even if they were, they give far too many at school and so are seen as homework by the children who get stressed out just looking at them. Our GD does. It's a holiday fgs. let them be.

[NicknameUsed]

I would be interested to know if anyone is successful in getting older teens to study during the summer holidays.

I suspect the answer would be rather different. DD sat her GCSEs this year. She worked hard for them and there is no way that I will make her study this summer, except for some psychology A level homework she has been set.

[ppeatfruit]

Doing what THEY want is different of course, they'll rebel because it's what the parent, school or carer wants. Who wants to stress themselves and their kids out in the sumer holidays?

[diamondlilly]

don't know how she views her parents - do know she missed out on a job she really wanted because the application process included asking a lot of information about people skills, particularly motivating people without aggression.

'But without aggression how on earth could I get someone to improve' she complained after.

[wanderings]

When I was at primary school: with my mum (who was a teacher), it was very much about how she presented it whether I cooperated or not. We had lots of days out to museums and so on - all fine. She used to encourage us to write diaries - ok, but as soon as she made it into a chore, something that "had" to be done, especially if she started sounding "teacherish", I then lost heart almost at once. To my mind "holiday work" was an oxymoron.

When I was at secondary school I grudgingly did whatever homework/revision I had been set in the holidays (while considering it a huge waste of holiday time).

My advice is: present it carefully, make it seem fun. I still feel bitter about holiday time I felt was "stolen" by being made to do school "work", even if the intentions were good.

[MajesticSeaFlapFlap]

I really don't think that 30 minutes out of a 13 hour day is destroying childhoods...

[katemiddletonsnudeheels]

Try it.

[redhat]

We are kate

Mine are currently sitting here quite happily after a full day of water fights, ice creams, a mammoth lego war, time playing disney infinity on the PS4, a table tennis tournament and a picnic lunch. DS2 is doing maths on the computer and keeps running in excitedly to tell me his percentage score. He will then do piano practice. DS1 has just finished his maths and is now on a touch typing programme.

Neither has had their childhood destroyed today.

[Totalshambles]

I so agree with this Redhat. Us too. Mine did some Maths sheets just now, 20 minutes and some music practice this morning. She played happily engrossed in a game for three hours (!) before helping to make breakfast then had a long play date involving all kinds of craziness. She then baked cakes, ran around like a lunatic in the park and came home and drew pictures (her choice). Twenty minutes maths now isn't a problem. She isn't complaining. If she made a fuss about it and clearly hated it, that's another issue. But if she is happy to do it what's the problem? She gets stickers, then they watch a film. I don't get the drama.
I am wrecking their childhoods? Or am I teaching them that education is something we do, we enjoy, there's no drama about it, we just do it. I just don't get the mean bit. Mean if I am keeping them in for hours on end yes granted. But not one of us who do this has suggested it.

Maybe calling it mean is lazy parenting. Maybe the 'mean' brigade can't actually be bothered to sit with their kids and do it/come up with relevant stuff to do so its easier not to bother and just call it 'a break'.

[CremeEggThief]

Sounds exhausting to me, Totalshambles. Holidays are for chilling and doing as little as possible, IMO. Each to their own, eh?

[SisterViktorine]

I think you've given up on boundaries far too soon CrèmeEgg. If you were talking about a 19/20 year old I would agree with you. 13, no.

You can still take the laptop away, insist on being up and dressed at 8.30, be out at sports practises etc.

[CremeEggThief]

No you can't and nor would I want to, SisterViktorine. As I said earlier, it's entirely up to DS to put the extra effort in now that will get him an A, as opposed to a B&B with minimal effort, and there is nothing either his teachers and I can do about it. He's had all the stimulation and role modelling that I can give in the early years, the buck stops with him now. Either you don't have teenagers yet, or yours were a lot more pliable and biddable to autheritage than my DS is. He drives me absolutely mental at times, but I am proud of his ability to think for himself and question authority.

[CremeEggThief]

Authority*.

[Oakmaiden]

Mine ask to do maths and "projects" over the holidays.

Last year in particular my daughter was a bit of a slave driver, making me come up with all sorts of work for her, because she wanted to make sure she had a head start on everyone else when she went to comp at the end of the holiday.

Children is odd.

[SisterViktorine]

I don't have teenagers yet but I teach children with severe demand avoidance/ PDA/ very high levels of anxiety about authority.

I do not assume that because they don't want, or can't face me asking them, to do something it is OK to just let them underachieve. I find ways to get the best out of them, whatever I have to do, in a way they can handle. I will take the same approach with DS until he really is able to make his own decisions.

[KERALA1]

Mine of their own initiative read and write stories. That's their idea of fun.

[SharonfromEON]

I let them holiday except what is set from school..but yes my DS will be doing something..
I have just shown the maths quest book mentioned earlier up the thread to my DS (9) and he really wanted it..Did a ebay search could get 3 for the price of 2 so he has picked 2 science quest ones too.
He has been behind until this year when Diagnosed with dysgraphia and made such great leaps he is still playing catch up.. He won't do it every day. He won't do it for long. I won't battle with him to do it..He learnt timetables playing games online.. I want to find a good division one, he has a coding site from school he wants to do. This will not be all he does all holiday. I bought a sewing thing from poundland , play games. I am sure spend time on x box.we are doing pokemon so lots of walks.we are going on holiday..He will want to take some books there. I do remember my dad giving a book about kings and queens to copy over the holidays.. It wasn't what I wanted to do so hated it.. Learning should be fun and not all children hate a worksheet.

[OuchLegoHurts]

I've only heard of one mother ever doing this before and I laughed and rolled my eyes and thought, 'Pushy mother!'

In spite of the fact that they get 8 weeks break here (and 12 weeks at Secondary level)

And also in spite of the fact that I'm a teacher!

[KellyBoo800]

It's only the first day of summer holidays and I've already taught DD(6) her times tables she loves learning so I have printed a load of worksheets out for her - I'm worried she will struggle to get back into a routine in September if she doesn't do some maintenance over the summer! As long as the downtime/playtime still massively outweighs the 'traditional learning', I think it's fine and sensible.

[catkind]

I'm not organised at the moment, but will try to provide some entertainment activities education stuff rather than completely leave them to own devices. They read anyway and do music practice. I'd like to find some mathsy puzzles for DS, rather than just drilling - anyone know a good book? I think he's read most of the murderous maths ones. DD wants to learn Spanish. (She also said Polish, but I don't know any resources for that, and one language at a time anyway!) Both of them will demand some learning games, they like sumdog and skoolbo at the moment, but we could try something new. DS watches a lot of planet earth type stuff if allowed, that's educational right? I've suggested summer diaries, DD is very keen, DS not sure yet.

[SeptemberFlowers]

YANBU - having reread the reports dc came home with from school this year, mine will be doing extra work as well. With the youngest I dress it up as playing shops though and getting her to write in a diary type thing. Her maths report was dire but she doesn't known this but has enough awareness to know she is behind her peers and has really bad self esteem, so we are doing lots of games to help her build her skills. Its hard going though sometimes!

[firawla]

Yanbu, I'm doing this with mine too. I'm keeping it quite relaxed and flexible but we have all kinds of work books and puzzle books so if they're stuck for something to do at some point in the day I'll get them to do a few pages then will check it for them. Ds2 particularly likes it he did lots of pages of cgp science today! I used to enjoy workbooks as a child so I don't feel bad at all to see them spend holiday time on it if they're happy to.

I also gave ds1 and ds2 a new notebook each for any summer holiday work they want to write. Ds1 chose to do a dragon poem the other day, and is planning to do stories and ds2 has been writing out times tables and sums- I let them choose what they want to do in it. They are 6 and 8.

My youngest is 4 and just finished reception, I think he needs more of a break so he's not done any work books or writing so far - plenty of colouring and drawing though! I won't push him as much since he's still little and inthink he benefits more from plenty of free play

[RickOShay]

There is no way I would do this. I am totally on CremeEgg's side.
The tortoise and the hare comes to mind.

[bumsexatthebingo]

There's tons of evidence showing that completing school homework has no effect on pupil attainment so I doubt there's any benefit to fannying about with it in the summer.
My dc's have been given nothing and I'm glad. That doesn't mean brains will be switched off though - they will be doing the real life learning that they do throughout the year. Buying things and calculating change, making lists, baking and all manner of other things.