Niece's new baby - no invite to visit

[Thepinklampshade]

So out niece had a new baby in December and we sent a lovely and expensive gift and told her that we understood she had loads of people visiting at the moment and we'd wait until she was ready and to just give us a call when she felt up to it. So this was in December sent a gift at xmas etc. No invite came. Saw her with the baby at a family function in february and we weren't even offered a hold and baby remained firmly fastened in pram. It's now the end of may and we've not seen them since. I'm gutted I was so excited to be a great aunt and I feel so hurt that she's chosen to do this.

[BadlyWrittenPoem]

I was thinking similar to previous posters until your clarification. You've obviously tried to the right thing but slightly mins

[BadlyWrittenPoem]

but slightly misjudged. Just send a message saying can I/we visit sometime next week; when would be convenient?

[JustHappy3]

The thinv is that if she was finding it hard at the start sheay simply not have read your message or read it and forgotten it. or her DP opened it and forgot to show her (or that could just be my DH!) So she could be thinking you sent a gift but haven't been in touch since. So contact her - say you'd love to see all of them and ask when's best for them timing wise. Take fruit and chocs for mum, something for DP and something useful for the baby (eg Anabel Karmel ice lolly moulds?) Tell them both they seem fantastic mum and baby is wonderful. Job done.

[TurtleEclipseofTheHeart]

DP and I found the first few months with our baby DS very full-on with everyone wanting to see him. Both sides of the family, friends, some closer family wanting to see him more than once of course. People we hadn't managed to see before christmas we did a vague "must see you in the new year..." then we had 5 months of crippling lack of sleep. I feel bad reading your post as it reminded me that there are still people we haven't seen (not family, but old friends living far away who would probably want to stay for a weekend.) OP, I am sure they would love to see you but are quite possibly so swamped and exhausted that they aren't thinking "we must see great auntie" and need a reminder! Perhaps you could ask how they are getting on, say you would love to see them all and suggest going for a coffee when they're free?

[EverySongbirdSays]

You very recently married in? And you are her aunt by marriage?

That's even more unreasonable then sorry.

To her you are her Uncle's new wife, not her baby's great aunt. Did he have a first wife they grew up with as an Aunt?

I'm not saying they aren't your family or anything by the way. But THAT dynamic is TOTALLY different!

[CommaStop]

Aww you really do sound as though you were trying to be nice and not intrude in the early stages. When my little girl was born my mum mostly arranged with my aunts/uncles to pop over when suited but I totally understand that every family dynamic can be different and you just weren't sure how they would usually do things. I'd send a message, email, text or call if that's more natural for you and say, hi, didn't want to crowd you while you were getting to know your little one but would eeally like to see you and welcome/meet x. Is there a time that would suit to meet/call over. I'm sure she's just caught up in the million and one things a new mum is coping with but would love to see you. I know I always really appreciated a bit of company/chat.

[paxillin]

Text her telling her you'd love to come and see the baby, you could add an invitation round to yours. You sound really nice and thoughtful. It is easy to get overlooked in the excitment of a new baby.