To be considering quitting part-time job with nothing to go to

[BB2000]

I have two DC (1 and 5) and have been lucky enough to return part-time 3 days a week to a good and relatively well paid job (Circa £30k for 3 days a week).

However I'm struggling. DS2 is a terrible sleeper which doesn't help and DH is away a lot for work. Recently we have a new boss for our team and the dynamics are changing hugely; the hours are getting longer and there is way too much work to do in my three days. He has made it clear that the team is on probabation in terms of how we are all performing so there is a real pressure to deliver. I have been increasingly logging back in to work after the DC are in bed and picking up quite a bit of work at the weekend. It is causing stress to my family (and me!) and is not what I want.

I'm tempted just to quit to get out of it but I know that decent part-time jobs are so hard to get. (I would actually love to be a SAHM but it would halve our income so not really feasible.) It is also a particular busy month for us so it could be that things will calm down if I can stick it out. (Though I think tbh the long hours culture is here to stay)

Anyone else been in a similar position - what did you do and did you regret it or was it a good move? Any good advice/thoughts anyone?

[PuppyMonkey]

Definitely think it's worth raising the working hours thing with your boss before doing anything - they might be willing to look at the problems you've described?

If not you'll just have to speak up a bit at the meetings and say you can't do the work as you're not in. Also the "expectation" to look at your emails at 9pm? What for exactly? What do they expect you to get done at 9pm?

Turn your emails off. Check them when you get in office. Out of office reply on your days off.

Keep repeating the above until it sinks in with others that you're part time.

[UsainWho]

I earn the same as you for 30 hours a week. I really don't enjoy my job but it is a professional position and part-time jobs simply don't come up, they are made for the people in them. If I quit, the best I could hope for would be a full-time position elsewhere and I can't get any childcare for after school in my area (all full).

When I went back after DC2 I changed to 5 days at 6 hours to fit in with school. This works loads better work-wise, but I really miss my day at home a week. My work prefer me being in every day too, more continuity. I also don't feel obliged the check emails at night etc. as I will be in the next day.

If I were to quit, we'd manage but our whole lifestyle would have to change and I don't want that, I like our house and cars and holidays etc. So, on balance I put up with the rotten job, you can't have your cake (part-time) and eat it.

[BB2000]

Thanks for all the replies - some really helpful thoughts and suggestions.
I will definitely start logging my hours to give me a proper idea of how much extra I am doing. Particularly when it does (hopefully) quieten down a bit so I can have a bit more balance in my assessment.

I am also going to set myself a deadline that I will definitely keep going till to see how it pans out. Whilst also thinking of escape routes. And certainly I wont let myself just leave without at least attempting to really address this/have a frank conversation about this with my manager.

Would love to just take a career break for 2-3 years and then just be able to jump straight back into the work-place. But I know this really hardly ever/never happens.

[HarlotBronte]

You seem to be presenting this as a stay in this job vs stop work altogether thing. But it kind of sounds like you just want to be somewhere else rather than wanting to be a SAHM specifically. I'm not saying you shouldn't be a SAHM if that's what you want to do, but there'd be most chance of it working for you if it were a positive choice made for itself not because you don't like the path you're on. So I'd at least consider other part time working options in different roles first. Have you worked out how much the household actually needs you to earn? Once you come up with that figure, you can then think about what options might allow you to do this.

[Artistic]

Hi there, I work 3 days at a bit more. Am only 'keeping the lights on' for a few years until I can get back to my 'career' rather than doing a job I barely care about. I've done 4 days before DD2, and it was mad. Practically full time workload in 4 days. Now I do 3 days over 4 days in the week (so 4 days childcare cost) but it's totally manageable because I am flexi on location and can work from home if there are no meetings planned. If I have to go then it's a 2 hour commute each way (within London, totally mad!). I dread to think of a time when I will have to go in all 3 days! Probably will be in your boat then. I'd urge you to not quit if you can, as it's hard to get back into employment that can work around children. Can you consider 3 days over 4 with maybe 1 day from home? That would give you shorter days and would make you more 'available' over the 4 days. May not work for you if you think they will just pile more work on your plate.