WIBU to think that this comment from a colleague was jerkish?

[WhoseBadgerIsThis]

This is really not much compared with many of the horrible work situations I've read about on here, but I'm doubting myself and would like the collective wisdom and bluntness of mumsnet to tell me if I over-reacted or not. Thanks!

So, I got new and very different specs at the weekend (old ones were thin metal half frames; new ones are thick brown plastic ones). I am told they suit me, and they certainly seem similar to ones that look good on other people. I have zero sense of style though, so a) I wouldn't have a clue if they look ok and b) I am quite sensitive about my not-exactly stylish persona.

Colleague in question is a work-friend, but has form for blunt/dickish comments (depending on how charitably you want to read them), such as joking that I'm "pathetic" whenever I catch the latest cold doing the rounds, or laughing at some item I'm wearing (twice - not all the time). So, first thing today he walks past and comments that I have new specs, and that they look "[dramatic pause]... interesting [dramatic pause]". If you can imagine someone saying "interesting" as in "fashion disaster" that's how I read his comment. I nod and smile and get on with my day. Later on he asks if these are the glasses I am wearing permanently now (he knows I always wear glasses all the time, so I have no idea what that question was getting at), and then when I say yes, he repeats the "interesting" comment. I reply that if he has nothing nice to say, then to say nothing at all, and I walk away.

So, WIBU to take his comment as a jibe? If I wasn't BU, how could I have handled it better? Should I have said something the first time he did it, on the grounds that it's better to say something first off, rather than say nothing for ages then explode when the last straw is one too many (I do this, and need to learn not to).

Blimey that was long, sorry!

[SurroMummy13]

He may think you're hot in your new glasses. Just wink at him next time you see him saying "you like them, eh?"

[KurriKurri]

I'm glad he's apologised though I'd be tempted to e-mail back 'you've confused me with someone who gives a fuck what you think' - but you are probably much nicer and more grown up than me

Honestly some people can't help themselves commenting on others.
A woman I worked with once said to me 'if you wear that awful frumpy cardigan again K I shall steal it and burn it'

I told her that now I knew she hated it so much I'd wear it even more often just to annoy her. She claimed she was being kind by giving me fashion advice - but there was nothing wrong with my cardi and I liked it - I still like it.

Just because other people have an opinion on how you look, it doesn't mean they are right

[WhoseBadgerIsThis]

Update! I got an email apology today, which to be fair sounded contrite (I am beginning to think he genuinely does treat his friends this way, shockingly). He did rather amusingly claim that what he meant was that it was an interesting (but good) new look that might take him a while to get used to. I refrained from any comment at all, especially one along the lines of "and why would you think I care if you get used to it or not?!" I will probably reply politely that as he mocks so much it's the first assumption I spring to, and to knock it off

Jobseekernightmare - I so hope you are wrong, but it has crossed my mind before. Eurgh!

Thank you everyone for your support, I am genuinely overwhelmed :)

[DisgraceToTheYChromosome]

Flick him a five pence piece and say "thank you for your input".

[OzzieFem]

PortiaCastis. Yes my eyewear is interesting but the trouble is I can now see peoples imperfections that previously eluded me. Then stare at the rude twat.

I would go with this. Brilliant.

[DecaffCoffeeAndRollupsPlease]

I'm sure your glasses look fab, and he's being a dick. Enjoy your new look. The early days with new frames can be fun, trying out different accessories or makeup to go with them.

[Baconyum]

Agree with pps saying don't get drawn into saying something rude or insulting back (funny and tempting as it might be, if he gets worse and you do end up having to take it higher you have the upper hand).

I worked somewhere and a colleague was like this with me (I hate boring conservative clothes but it was a traditional office setting so I wore inmoine with dress code but unusual colours/patterns). The awful bullying I ended up leaving over started like this. I dismissed it at first as me being oversensitive/banter/only joking but she kept pushing it as she wasn't getting a rise. It ended up being comments on the state of my marriage, direct insults against my country of origin, comments on my supposed lack of personal hygiene. Really nasty stuff, I left because the boss was her best mate and did bugger all even when I formally complained.

I agree with getting him to expand on seemingly neutral comments, he'll either say something really out of order you can pull him up on or report or he'll stfu! Hopefully the latter.

[amysmummy12345]

What a knob!! I would have retorted with something along the lines of "are you planning on wearing that face permanently?... Interesting.... Freaky, but interesting....." And left him to it

[BewitchedBotheredandBewildered]

How about a version of a famous quote, sorry can't remember who it was... Churchill maybe -

"Thing is, I can take the specs off, what are you going to do about your face?"

too strong?

[EveryoneElsie]

Why he gets such a kick out of undermining women is a small, dull mystery. Its low level dickishness, and I tend to be as thick as pigshit when it comes to those types of comments. I dont get them so I dont react, and people have to repeat them oo, two, three times. Bless 'em.

[BurstBees]

"What on earth makes you think I'm even remotely interested in your opinion?"
Tinkly little laugh optional.

[TealLove]

I would just say with a smile but no eye contact look at your screen " I know I love them"

[SarfEast1cated]

He sounds like a knob to me - but it also sounds like you rose above his comments rather admirably.

[lorelei9here]

Yes jobseekers, it could. That's another reason i hate personal remarks in the office.

[Jobseekernightmare]

It could mean interesting as in 'fuck I fancy you in them'

[FasterThanASnakeAndAMongoose]

He sounds...interesting boring

He's a twunt. I'd probably respond with a raised eyebrow and a totally deadpan "what do you mean?" Then just stare at him, ask him again, slowly and deliberately, what he means as you don't understand. As he flusters about stare at him for ages then eventually say "ok..." before walking slowly away with a look combining confusion, mirth and irritation.

I bet your glasses look fab. I would love a pair like that.

[WhoseBadgerIsThis]

I'm loving all these responses - thanks everyone!

[Pedestriana]

You could respond with "is that supposed to be banter? interesting"

[WhoseBadgerIsThis]

I wish there was a "like" button on mumsnet by the way - consider yourselves all liked :)

[WhoseBadgerIsThis]

I did pull him up on one of his comments a while back and he apologised (quite genuinely it seemed), but he doesn't seem to have learned from his mistakes! Dim as well as jerkish methinks :)

[A4Document]

Ask him "Did you mean to be so rude?"

[ifcatscouldtalk]

He probably thinks he is being amusing. I work with someone who was often doing subtle digs in the name of banter. One day I felt really ill and unlike me got quite upset, said colleague doesn't even look at me now! I'm sure you look good, some people are just utter twats.

[Pixienott0005]

What Hissy said! Who is he to put you down. Say your bit and say see you next Tuesday.

[WhoseBadgerIsThis]

You're all fab you lot!
My lack of confidence tends to mean I hear his comments and think "maybe he's right, maybe he's trying to do me a favour by telling me", but everything you've all said has made me realise it's not me - it's him, and has given me a ton more confidence!

[Hissy]

I would also say "wow how dull is your life if you think glasses are interesting.. Sounds like you need a hobby. Or a shag..."