At what age should a child start ironing?

[Boogers]

H and I had a big argument last night about the things that DS(12) can and can't do. I said DS should be learning how to iron by now, to which H strongly disagreed.

I remember ironing my dad's hankerchiefs when I was about 7 or 8, and when I was about 12 or 13 I was ironing my school uniform on a Sunday evening (in autumn it was 5 shirts, 3 box pleated skirts, 1 blazer, in summer it was 5 dresses and 1 blazer).

DS had no issues with co-ordination or ability to sense hot and cold, there is no reason why he can't learn to use an iron. H says that he and his brother never ironed when they were younger (his brother is 40 and has never ironed in his life; his parents, my in-laws, do it all for him).

Who is being unreasonable here, me or H? Should I encourage DS to learn how to iron?

[ladydepp]

This thread has made me . I get it that people don't like ironing and possibly don't need to, but what kind of jobs are people doing that they don't even own an iron??
My DH wears an ironed shirt to work every day. I'm a SAHM but I still like to wear a nicely ironed shirt or dress sometimes and I like the same for my children. I think it's definitely a skill that should be taught, my DH actually taught me how to iron a shirt properly after I'd had a bit of a shouting match with the iron one day .
I also think cleaning is a skill that is much more efficiently done if you've been taught how to do it properly.

[whattheseithakasmean]

I am not going to wade into the should you/shouldn't you iron fight, because I really don't care. But I do think that if anyone wants to iron, they will not be disadvantaged by not being taught as a child. Run hot iron over clothes until they are flat - surely that could never be beyond the wit of any adult? Certainly, I don't remember anyone specifically teaching me to iron, but I am confident in my ability to iron, if I ever felt I wanted to.

[pearlylum]

I think the analogy between ironing and wearing make up is a good one. Both unnecessary, both cosmetic and neither a life skill.

If I were to teach my DD how to apply make up then I am implying that she needs to as a functional part of being an adult. This is a very wrong message, placing such emphasis on image. We already are such an image obsessed society, I don't want my children to grow up feeling that their value and worth is based on how they look.

Make up- like ironing is a choice. I bring up my children to feel worth through their words and actions, not through make up and flat clothes.

[merrymouse]

[merrymouse]

[merrymouse]

[Higge]

Image does matter no matter how much you shout about it, don't acknowledge it if that's what matters to you but it will hold you back in many jobs.
Imo, it's not the skill of ironing that's important - it's the ability to do stuff for yourself, even at the age of 12 to start taking responsibility that's the real skill or maybe better described as the mindset, maybe it comes quickly to some but to many young adults I observe they are still in the infant stages and have a long way to go.

[Dancergirl]

There were loads of things my mum didn't 'teach' me (including both ironing and make up!) but I had no trouble doing for myself when I wanted/needed to.

I think some people get into this panic that if they don't teach their dc how to do things when they're young they'll turn into lazy feckless adults.

Not true.

[merrymouse]

Agree dancergirl. I think it's perfectly natural to teach your children to do some things, just as a function of living together.

However, you don't need to teach children everything.

If you can't pick up simple skills later in life, that is the thing that is going to hold you back, not the fact that your parents didn't complete some imaginary checklist.

[Lweji]

This is a very wrong message, placing such emphasis on image. We already are such an image obsessed society, I don't want my children to grow up feeling that their value and worth is based on how they look.

This is why I asked earlier about going out with stained clothes. We do live in a society and the image we present does tell about us.
We aren't likely to go out in completely outdated clothes, clothes with holes, without combing our hair or washing out faces. We don't go out with big stains on our clothes.
How we present ourselves does matter. We may not need to have all clothes starched, and women shouldn't need make up (mostly because it's not required of men), but for many jobs it's important how we present ourselves and for many people having ironed clothes is part of it.
Sending it off to be done just means that it's outsourced. As many things in life we can pay others to do it for us, but for me if we can learn how to do it at an early age the better and the more we learn as young people the better.
We shouldn't necessarily have to learn any single skill, but we should definitely learn a range of skills and there's no reason ironing shouldn't be one of them.

Storm in a very small cup here.

[WildwestWind]

My girls iron their clothes with hair straighteners

[Lweji]

That is funny.
Yesterday I straightened a bit of a blouse with my hair drier. it was just handier at the time.

[pearlylum]

Lweji I often go out with stained or torn clothes. So does my OH. No big deal.

[Lweji]

To work?
Oddly, most people don't.

[whois]

I don't wear stained clothes to work. That would not go down well!

A nicely ironed shirt looks better than a crumpled shirt. I just don't agree that it's an essential skill when it's so cheap to have your shirts laundered for you.

[pearlylum]

Most of the clothes I wore to work were badly stained, holed and had burn marks on them.

[Lweji]

It depends where you work. But one example hardly justifies a point.
Outsourcing is also no reason to justify not learning a skill.
I'm still to see how it would harm anyone learning to iron that so many people are telling the OP not to teach her son to iron.
Sure, he'll survive without it. But no disadvantage in learning. Like I said, big storm, very little cup.

[Statelychange]

I've had minimum wage jobs where an ironed shirt was still a requirement - apart from the disproportionate cost - £1:50 per shirt, you need to have a large supply of shirts or be a very frequent visitor to the cleaners to make it work. Totally daft idea for many people.

[OneMagnumisneverenough]

Why are some people so up their own arse that they can't imagine that anyone lives in a different way to them?

At the same time preaching about how they are bringing up their children to respect themselves and others for things other than what they deem to be superficial, they seem to have no ability to understand that anyone could possibly achieve self esteem and have pride in the way they present themselves or could possibly be employed somewhere where they need to be clean and smartly dressed.

I can understand that there will be types of employment (farming/animal care/construction etc) where wearing old dirty and unironed clothes would be the norm, yet those free thinking people to whom image is of no concern haven't got the brain cells to understand that turning up at the office or in retail or hairdressers for example in manky, torn and unironed clothes would lose you or your employer business or you your job/career opportunities?

Make up isn't always purely cosmetic for people who may have scars etc that they feel better when they are covered up, or for people to whom it gives confidence. It shouldn't matter, but to them it does. I thought we were meant to be more understanding of mental health?

[CecilyP]

The thing that I got from the opening post was the reason OP wanted her DS to learn to iron at 12 (let's face it, he won't be leaving home any time soon) is so he could do his own ironing and lighten her ironing load, as her DH is no help whatsoever. I think all non-ironers are pointing out is that she could greatly decrease her ironing load by ironing far fewer clothes than she currently does. If it wasnt a problem for her she wouldn't have posted.

[OneMagnumisneverenough]

That's not the impression I got at all Cecily The ironing seemed to be part of a larger discussion on things that she feels her DS should be able to do at 12. Her DH never learned to iron so feels it is unnecessary, presumably as he assumes that DSs partner will do all his ironing, I didn't get the impression that her DH didn't think things needed ironed or that the OP wanted her DS to help with the pile. It seems to me that she didn't want history repeating itself and wanted her son to learn and start to take care of himself.

Maybe the OP will think that maybe she wants to iron less and can take any tips given on here to do so. However the only tips seem to be, buy things that don't need ironed and/or tumble dry and carefully hang everything. She may not see this as much of a time saving. Or maybe she will carry on ironing as before and teach her son to iron carefully, neatly and quickly enabling him to to take part in his own personal care. Who knows?

[Lweji]

I got the impression that OP's parter does iron, just didn't as a child.
But I agree that it was mostly about skills, or small jobs at home than lessening up the OP's burden.

[OneMagnumisneverenough]

yes maybe right there Lweji she said he didn't iron when he was younger and it was his brother that has never ironed.

[Boogers]

Hi, I didn't realise this thread would run and run, so forgive me for not responding sooner.

H does iron and he does put washing in - we both take ownership of it - it was more that H didn't iron when he was younger and he thinks our DCs shouldn't iron now. His brother has never ironed, he doesn't even own a washing machine. He brings his bag if washing to their house when he goes for lunch on Sunday and he collects it all again on a Tuesday evening, washed, dried and ironed. That's my in-law's lookout, but I'm buggered if I'm going to be doing my DCs laundry for them when they're aged 40 (yes, 40!!) unless they were incapable of doing it themselves through illness or such like.

[OneMagnumisneverenough]

I thought you'd just had enough of the fighting OP :)

That was one hell of a hornets nest for a fairly innocuous question!

DS1 just reminded me that at their school "activity" day, for the 15/16 year olds, one of the male teachers taught all the boys how to iron a shirt - DS was already an expert though since he's been doing his since he was 12 and he said quite a lot of the boys could already do it as well. He said it was a good laugh. The girls did a different activity but he can't remember what it was.