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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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AIBU to ask you to STOP

392 replies

Dawndonnaagain · 03/04/2016 14:38

using the term 'autistics'. Four fucking times this weekend on different threads. You mean person with autism, people with autism, child with autism. Autistics is not shorthand for any of those. Pack it in.
Angry

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NewYearNewToads · 03/04/2016 15:21

I wouldn't refer to myself as "an" autistic however, simply autistic.

Is that the difference?

Dawndonnaagain · 03/04/2016 15:21

Thorium. I'm not.

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NewYearNewToads · 03/04/2016 15:23

I find existing in the neurotypical world stressful enough without yet another person dictating to me how I should define and refer to myself

I think that's kind of how I feel.

nanetterose · 03/04/2016 15:24

Dawn (l think) is saying that calling people with autism "autistics". Is making her uncomfortable & that it makes every person with autism sound the same. Like a whole bunch of people that are NT can just file under 'autistics' & be done.
It doesn't tell you very much at all. To me, (NT) but support a child with autism - it just sounds dismissive.

waitingforgodot · 03/04/2016 15:24

I wouldn't ever use the term "the autistics" and would respect the views of posters on here. Thanks for opening the discussion DawnDonna

BankWadger · 03/04/2016 15:25

YANBU OP. It's up there with people describing themselves as a bit OCD because they like a clean kitchen.

Terms like these belittle conditions/illnesses and the hardships that come with them.

NewYearNewToads · 03/04/2016 15:25

I don't think I've ever heard anyone use "the" autistics. That just sounds weird.

waitingforgodot · 03/04/2016 15:27

In a similar way, " we are all on the spectrum" annoys the crap out of me

Thorium23 · 03/04/2016 15:29

I suppose we will have to wait and see what they decide to call us if the language surrounding this issue is changing Sad

PhilPhilConnors · 03/04/2016 15:29

Yes, same here Godot.
We're all on the human spectrum. We are not all on the autistic spectrum, unless of course, we have autism.
Very irritating and dismissive to the issues that people with ASD face.

Dawndonnaagain · 03/04/2016 15:29

waiting Flowers

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Dawndonnaagain · 03/04/2016 15:31

In a similar way, " we are all on the spectrum" annoys the crap out of me
Oh good grief yes! It minimises, it's so dismissive.

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Summer23 · 03/04/2016 15:31

YANBU that's not a term I would use either. I haven't seen this here but clearly you have, quite right to highlight this.

BeyondTellsEveryoneRealFacts · 03/04/2016 15:31

I will be honest, this entire concept hadnt occured to me. I hope it wasnt me that said it!

Dawndonnaagain · 03/04/2016 15:32

Thank you Bank.

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NewYearNewToads · 03/04/2016 15:34

Taking on board other people's opinions however I will try not to use it when talking about other people.

However I'm not going to stop using the term when referring to myself.

BeyondTellsEveryoneRealFacts · 03/04/2016 15:38

"We're all on the spectrum" causes me physical pain!!

PhilPhilConnors · 03/04/2016 15:39

Ds2's paed said "we are all a little bit autistic" in ds's first appointment. I've considered him ignorant ever since :o

zen1 · 03/04/2016 15:40

My child has been diagnosed with ASD and I always refer to his condition as 'being on the autism spectrum'. I have heard the term 'autistic' used as an insult - e.g group of boys mucking about and one of them does something silly and others laugh and say "that's soooo autistic". However, having read the study (I think Poltergoose) linked to in one of the threads yesterday, I was interested in how people on the autism spectrum prefer to define themselves. I do agree that to refer to a bunch of people with ASC as 'autistics' is insulting in the same way that defining a group of children who happen to have additional needs as "special needs children" is insulting because it strips them of their individuality and focuses just on their additional needs.

Vintage45 · 03/04/2016 15:42

?????

Nothing wrong with what I call "grouping" its a natural human thing to do. YOU don't like it which is fair enough on a personal level but to tell people to STOP is rude.

BeyondTellsEveryoneRealFacts · 03/04/2016 15:46

I love how someone posts something relating to autism, pointing out that they are autistic themselves, and a load of people come on and tell them they are being rude Hmm

Sallystyle · 03/04/2016 15:48

I once got told off IRL for saying my husband is bipolar.

Apparently I should say he has bipolar. I will still say my husband is bipolar if I want because it is such a huge part of him and affects who he is.

I wouldn't like people saying 'the bipolars' though.

YANBU.

nanetterose · 03/04/2016 15:48

Vintage, why would you want to group people with autism.
Who does that help?
Every single person with it, is different.
There are some 'typical' traits - but that is all.

Dawndonnaagain · 03/04/2016 15:49

This reply has been deleted

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Dawndonnaagain · 03/04/2016 15:49

(I did ask her permission before I posted the above).

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