AIBU to ask you to STOP

[Dawndonnaagain]

using the term 'autistics'. Four fucking times this weekend on different threads. You mean person with autism, people with autism, child with autism. Autistics is not shorthand for any of those. Pack it in.

[SilverBirchWithout]

Honestly, some people need English lessons before they began to lecture others on terminology

What on earth do you mean by this comment?

English is not a dead and static language. It is a living and evolving language, changing as new words, phrases and accepted meanings come into common usage. Which is the one of the main points of the development of this thread.

[BeyondTellsEveryoneRealFacts]

Sylvia, re right/wrong words.

Autistics / autistic people / on the spectrum / with asd - possible right terms. No consensus as yet.

However.
Insults along the lines of 'retard', 'spaz', 'mong' etc (sorry all) - wrong words. Definite consensus and not that difficult to understand unless you are trying to pick a fight in an empty room

And may i make a small suggestion, that if you want to claim the high ground on english usage, you dont use words like "wronger". Hth :)

[sleeponeday]

Sylvia this is the second thread in as many days you've been on showing pointless and unprovoked aggression. I am sorry if things are tough on you at the moment, which I can only presume may be behind it, but would you please try to remember other posters are human beings, and not there for you to snipe at?

[fanjoforthemammaries7850]

Maybe read the thread and see that I was answering someone instead of taking a phrase of mine and trying to have an argument about it?

[SylviaWrath]

Of course perfectly decent people will object to being told they are being offensive when they are using a normal, well recognised, and perfectly acceptable term to the majority of people.
What are you even talking about?

[fanjoforthemammaries7850]

I didn't say people must be told.

I merely said if someone is decent then I don't think they would mind being told. In no way did I lecture anyone on terminology.

Some people need lessons in not going around trying to conjure up a bunfight out of thin air.

[SylviaWrath]

If you think there is one right term, then by definition ALL the others are wrong terms. Thats how language works. Some may be wronger than others, but if you are out to choose ONE right term, then that leaves only wrong ones for the others.

Fanjo you don't make the slightest bit of sense. You can't say that people should be told when they are causing offence so they can do the right thing and not use that term, and also that it is subjective to each person. The two points are contradictive.

Honestly, some people need English lessons before they began to lecture others on terminology.

[BeyondTellsEveryoneRealFacts]

"there is no consensus on what are the wrong terms"

Being able to agree on the right term is not the same as there being no consensus on wrong terms. I could write you a list of wrong terms, if you really need one.

[fanjoforthemammaries7850]

Did you read my last line Sylvia?

Namely "what is offensive is very subjective".

Seems not,or you are choosing to ignore it for some reason

[SylviaWrath]

But my point was merely that if someone is decent and well meaning but accidentally using the wrong terms then I don't think they would object to being told if they were saying something offensive as I'd imagine they'd prefer not to

I know thats your point. Its the point I answered. / Which, if you didn't understand was: what are the WRONG terms? You could tell me that you find a term offensive, and as a decent person you'd expect me to thank you and stop using it. Ok, so then I use a different term and someone else tells me they find that offensive and I should stop using it.
So then what, I find a new term? Until of course a third person tells me not to use that one....

There is no consensus on what are the wrong terms, just varying opinions, many of which directly contradict each other. It is only when a consensus happens that society agrees on what terms are then nonU.

[PhilPhilConnors]

I've gone from never seeing "autistics" to suddenly seeing it all over the place.
This photo was shared on FB, in this context I think it's ok, it gets the message across clearly without uneccessary wordage. In other contexts though, I can see how it could offend.
Someone up thread mention dyslexia. Singularly, someone is dyslexic, if a school advertised that they were supportive to "the dyslexics" it sounds quite derogatory.

[BeyondTellsEveryoneRealFacts]

Looking at those charts, noone has even mentioned "on the autistic spectrum" yet according to that its one of the most popular?

[NaughtToThreeSadOnions]

Sorry I'm an autistic person I'm not under any circumstances a person with autism it makes my skin crawl!!! Your saying its up to the person what they call themselves yet your dictating what we should be called! I don't want to be called a person with autism!

And no I'm not an autistic either! But I don't think you can dictate!

[fanjoforthemammaries7850]

Someone who said that we should never ever correct someone using offensive language as their intention is all that matters.

I agree in that I wouldn't leap in and flame someone if they accidentally said something I felt offensive but were clearly a nice person - but I think maybe if they were nice they'd want to be told they could offend people.

Although it is clear from this thread that what is offensive is very subjective.

[fanjoforthemammaries7850]

Sylvia I have not said I have a particular preference for anything really on this thread.

Nor do I often point out use of language on MN. But my point was merely that if someone is decent and well meaning but accidentally using the wrong terms then I don't think they would object to being told if they were saying something offensive as I'd imagine they'd prefer not to.

Am slightly being quoted out of context here as if I meant everyone should go around stridently berating others.

I didn't I was answering someone else.

[Eustace2016]

We should also get grammar right. So you might say. She is female. She has brownr. She has asperger's syndrome. You would not say she is brown hair. You would say she is deaf or she is blind but not she is mumps or she is chickenpox.

[StopBoasting]

That's how I read it too.

It also looks like you should change your terminology depending on whether you are addressing someone who has is autistic or whether you are addressing someone else.

[StopBoasting]

What I've taken from the thread is that "autistic people" is the term likely to give least offence to either identity-first or people-first advocates

......but thats not necessarily what's preferred by people with autism autistic adults in the report referred to by Poltergoose. (If I'm interpreting it correctly? )

[StopBoasting]

PolterGooses Link is really interesting and reasonable scientific albeit with drawbacks.

The report is based on a much bigger sample (4000+ people) than this thread and I think it was conducted last year

It's probably best to look at the accompanying graph in the content of the report. It's interesting how using the them 'person with autism' is less well endorsed than other terms.

ASD is more 'endorsed' than ASC by a higher percent of stakeholders, i.e. Person with autism, parent, professional and family member.

I'm going to discount everything on this tread and use the report . Actually. I will do the sensible thing and try to avoid ever directly referring to autism again

[PageStillNotFound404]

roundaboutthetown What I've taken from the thread is that "autistic people" is the term likely to give least offence to either identity-first or people-first advocates.

[hedgehogsdontbite]

Roundabout please could you point me to where anyone has said they find the term 'people with autism' offensive or unacceptable? I thought I RTFT but must have missed that.

I find it offensive. The whole purpose of saying 'person with autism' is to separate the person from the autism because the autism is a disease and does not define them. Except autism is an integral part of who we are. 'Person with autism' is implying that a massive part of who I am is wrong.

[SylviaWrath]

That link of a survey don't on preferred terms; the majority of people on the spectrum and their families preferred to use autistic people/he is autistic etc...and the majority of professionals working in the area preferred people with autism.

If we're going to decide on a term shouldn't we be going with what the people actually living with it want to use?

[Bluebolt]

Equally what we do not want is decent people not engaging due to fear of offending especially if that person is on the spectrum. Is is very interesting and I am more confused about terminology but I have been for a while and why if I need to disclose about DS2 I avoid all reference to Autism.