To think we are very adverage

[Wineandcheases]

What ever that may be !
On another thread it was suggested that we work a lot of hours and a comment of - "how do you have time for family life I hope it's worth it "- has stuck
Husband does 50 and I do Aprox 25 ( reduced as have dc )
We aren't greedy we need to live . This does give us extras but we aren't loaded so to speak .
Can I ask how many hours the adults in your family do ? Do you find it hard ?

[ExasperatedAlmostAlways]

My dh is varied he's currently working away and is doing 12 hours a day, seven days a week. So, 84 hours.

I'm a sahm and will be until he isn't working away anymore.

[FifteenFortyNine]

I do 60, DH does 70, we have no real family time as DH works evenings and weekends. I do feel lucky that we have found a great childminder who provides a family environment for our DS during the day. And I have evenings and weekends with him and DH has one day during the week. When he goes to school I want to reduce hours so I can be there to either pickup or drop off. With my current job, reduced hours/ flexitime/parttime is not possible so I will need to quickly start looking at other options.

[DaphneWhitethigh]

Oliver James used to keep quoting stats saying that very very few mothers of under 5s worked full time and those that did were inevitably dooming their child to a lifetime of mental illness. But he's a well known twat and I can't find any actual data on the Internet after a cursory Google to state what the average working hours are for parents of that age group. I can believe that the cost of childcare means that two lots of full time employment is pretty rare though with young children.

DH and I do about 50 hours and 30 hours including commutes.

[YaySirNaySir]

DH- 40
Me- 10
We don't need my wage and live very comfortably on DH's, however I am contemplating doing a few more hours soon just to ensure the early retirement that we've been planning forever still materialises.
I used to work 50 hours+ before DC. I can't imagine doing that now.

[alltouchedout]

I guess if we include the travel in the working hours, he does 55 and I do about 30. No wonder we feel like we do nothing but go to work!

[alltouchedout]

Atm I do 21, rising to 30 in May ( ) and dh does about 45. DH's travel is an hour plus each way and he starts work at 7:30. My travel is rubbish, if I wasn't dropping dc off at/ picking them up from multiple locations it would be fairly straightforward but that coupled with peak time publc transport means from 8am- 9:30 am and 5 pm - 6:30 pm each day I really do feel like I could explode at any moment.
We are not well paid. If we worked less we would struggle.

[Xmasbaby11]

Dh does 50 ft (lots of paperwork in the evenings) and I do 24 pt. It's a stretch financially as dc are 2 and 4 so nursery fees are high.

I feel we have plenty of time with the kids. They are in nursery 3.5 days. We all have breakfast together and an evening meal, Dh and I are both around to put them to bed so the dc have one parent each at bedtime. Weekends are nearly all family time.

[Gisla]

Dh works 40 hours a week. I am a sahm now and study 6 - 20 hours per week depending on what I need to do.

[ivykaty44]

I work 20 hours per week in a salaried job, then I work at home on and off probably about 4-5 hours per week and earn nearly as much. Dp work for himself and does a lot of wfh, he's worked the last three days 7am-10pm but we were out for lunch yesterday.

It's swings and roundabouts though as we can pop shopping or have time out during the week for a coffee in town etc if he's working from home.

My dc are older though and family days out are pretty much in the past, a meal out is more typical now

[soundsystem]

DH works 42.5 hours, works shifts and only has a 15 minute commute. He has one full day in the week with DD while I'm at work, and we all have every other weekend together.

I do 40 hours officially but part of what I do is quite seasonal so in busy periods I can work 50-60 hours a week. I'm lucky I that I have a lot of flexibility so if it's a nice day I can leave the office at, say, 3.30, pick DD up early and head to the park/out for tea or whatever then work after she's in bed (if DH is on a late shift that works well all round).

In our case the long hours aren't entirely motivated by money; we could get by on less but we both like what we do! DH could do his job part-time (and might well do in future when DD is school-aged, particularly if we have more DC). My job isn't really doable part time at my level in the industry I'm in.

[WutheringTights]

DH does around 40 hours, one day in the office (3 hour round trip) and four at home. I do around 30-35 hours part time over four days (usually 3 in the office, 45 minute commute each way, and one at home. We have a good balance, mainly because of the working at home. DH might have to be more office based in a year or two which will have a massive impact on our standard of life.

[NothingButAHoundDog]

DH does as many hours as needed, his job is mental at the mo and he never really switches off. Hard to count up how many hours as no two days are the same, but it would be a LOT. He does a lot of travel too and is away some weekends. Its crap but he earns well, and we're sticking with it for now, hopefully not forever.
I do 24.5 hrs a week but that's school hours and term time only, so I am lucky enough to never have to pay for childcare.

[Kennington]

This is really interesting
My attitude is none of this is forever as they are only young for a short time.
Evenings and weekends are great and we alway ensure one of us is about then.
My grand mothers generation was worse as they had to do longer hours for pittance.

[LadyMaryofDownt0n]

40 hours each, some weeks I do 50. I work shifts so it's not always possible to have sleep & family time. I usually have to pick between the two.

This week we've had no family time so far but me & DH managed to get out for dinner for the first time in a year. We couldn't believe it had been that long.

This week coming I've organised an Easter egg hunt, Disney on ice, a concert & an other meal out with DH. This will be a good week. oh & I've even managed to squeeze in a playdate tomorrow for all three kids :)

[Stripyhoglets]

DH 37. Me 25 - I am thinking of going up to 30 as new boss is good about flexible working so can do some from home. And we could do with the money.

[HandsomeGroomGiveHerRoom]

Gently, there are weekends, mornings and evenings. It doesn't have to be that dreadful, honestly.

[gentlydownthestreammm]

DH does about 50, me about 40 (not including lunchbreaks)

The killer is that I have an hour commute each way and DP has about 1.5 hrs each way. But the commutes are often v unpredictable wrt traffic, public transport problems etc.

It is already very hard for us to have DSD during the week, though we do! It means on those days DH's commute goes up to about 2.5 hrs each way taking into account school runs.

I cannot see how bringing another child into play would be possible! One of us would have to make big career sacrifices, but I don't think either of us would want to be a SAHP. Luckily neither of us is feeling broody...

When I see people around me working full time with comparable commutes AND children...I just feel full of horror, it seems like hell, the stressful race across town to get them from after school club, the extra household chores and total lack of 'me' time. I think the part of me that would normally think the joys of having a child would make all that worth it, is broken or absent.

[GreatFuckability]

Single parent and I am in uni so around 30 hours a week out of the house and then any work on top.

[GinandJag]

I do about 50 hours (teacher) and DH about 55 (industry), but travelling every 3-4 weeks.

I am home by 4pm every day so plenty of time for family. I don't work in the evenings or weekends.

[Natsku]

I don't work at all right now but will be starting a work placement next month hopefully but will do only one or two days a week and probably no more than 5 or 6 hours.

OH's hours vary as he works in a micro business with his dad so it depends on what work is available but usually he leaves for work at 7 or 8 and is done by early afternoon so roughly 30-35 hours a week plus he spends about 4 hours a week on paperwork but he can do that at home. Some weeks though he can be working 12 hour days.

This works well for us, we don't have a lot of money (we could have more but OH only takes a small pay each month preferring most of the money to stay invested in the business) but we do get lots of family time.

[HandsomeGroomGiveHerRoom]

Looking back, the hardest period I had was when I was working 40 hours but had a 3 hour a day commute and a shit salary. I barely saw ds on weekdays. My ex did the same hours, but earned more so had a car, bringing his commute down to an hour a day. Seems fair

Working fewer hours but receiving CTs as a LP with a preschooler was OK, but I never really had the funds to fully enjoy the extra time we had. It was ok in nice weather, but when the weather was crap being stuck at home was a bit pants.

[WorraLiberty]

DH does 40 and I do 10.

[BigGlasses]

I am out of the house 8.30 -6pm each day which includes a 20 min commute each way. I work through lunch normally, so probably do 42.5 hours a week. I an contracted for 36.25

DH is out of the house 8.25 - 5.15 each day which includes a 5 min commute each way. He is contracted for 40 hours which he does, and he gets any overtime back as time in lieu

[MardAsSnails]

I'm 50-60 hours depending if I do anything from home. 30-45 min each way commute on top.

DH does 60-70 per week, with a 5 min commute.

I win the bread in our house we both work extremely hard in very stressful jobs, and thankfully get paid accordingly.

We have full time home help though, it's the only way we'd manage to eat anything other than pizza otherwise.

[Piemernator]

I have worked a 50 hour week in the past, it certainly isn't great but that was the role and at least I earned a decent salary. It must be shit if you are on low pay.

DH still works those kind of hours but some of it is at home and he has quite good flexibility.

My friend works a 40 hour week but commutes for at least 4 hours a day, she is absolutely wrecked by this and I fear for her long term health.

Those long hours when younger have stood me in good stead as I have now officially retired before 50. We still have a secondary school age child and the pressure removed now I'm at home for both of us is great. I do have some health issues, if they hadn't developed I would still be working.