Clothing nightmare :-((

[Tryingtostayyoung]

DD 3 is giving me nightmares every single day when I get her dressed, she thinks that everything is uncomfortable and it isn't that she wants to pick her own clothes because she's quite happy for me to but everyday something else is annoying her (one day it's knickers, next day it's socks etc etc) it's so frustrating and takes ages to get her to calm down after she's finally dressed for it to then start up again when we leave the house and have to put shoes and a coat on. I know this isn't a sensitivity issue because of various reasons, I think she just gets it into her head and that its all stemmed from when she went to her cousins house and the little boy does have sensitivity issues and she witnessed him having a meltdown over his clothes, ever since then this has started before then we NEVER had a problem.

This isn't really an AIBU, but I needed traffic because I need help!!!!! Has anyone else had similar situations to this?? What did you do??? Thanks everyone!!

[Janecc]

I was given the tip of choice 2 sets of clothes. Disaster, she couldn't cope with this limited choice and often went thru the entire wardrobe. And yes I'd forgotten about the favourite dress. Worn for months and months. I used to wash at night ready for the next day. Wo betide if it was dirty! Again a phase .....

[SupSlick]

DS(3) fucking despises socks. Even the sight of a single sock will reduce him to tears. My car is full of socks that he's ripped off in a rage.

He would wear the same t shirt all year if I let him.

No advice, but I feel you OP.

[LittleRedSparke]

i dont like seams, so i wear my socks inside out!

do you give her a choice between 2 sets of clothes?

[loosechange]

Result!

[SonjasSister]

Great! Even without stickers, I used to try to remember to name and praise calm behaviour. There's a theory that if thaowhat they hear about themselves often (they have done well, they stayed calm, whenever you notice they have) they believe it about themselves and it makes it easier for them to achieve.

I think the issues are real - I still can't abide labels and I'm not 3! - and teenage dd has issues with layering sleeves but as they get older, they deal with it themselves, so the angst plummets.

[tobysmum77]

Dd1 was the same and still is to some extent. The key for me was letting her choose her clothes and overt time I then had a better chance of choosing the right stuff.

She still won't wear jeans at 7, tights she will now but refused for years. I wouldn't even try anything itchy. She spent the first two school winters in grey school trousers made of jogging bottom material; 'Nice soft trousers'.

[Tryingtostayyoung]

Loosechange your sticker idea had actually worked this morning!! Got her dressed to the sound of the usual tantrum but then I said because she was going to keep her clothes on and not cry she could have a sticker which she was very happy about, magically she stopped crying and has gone about playing!! Usually I would have atleast a 30min meltdown followed by her clinging to me for atleast another 30mins!!

Unfortunately showering her the clothes the night before didn't seem to make much difference although she seemed prepared to know that she wasn't going to be happy!! (Even though every item makes her unhappy!!)

[RunnerOnTheRun]

Thanks for the seam free/comfort sock tips!

I have also put DD in the car with no socks on before to do the school run! I try to sympathise but groundhog day.

[DisappointedOne]

It seems like socks are the reoccurring thing, I wonder why?!

Because feet are extremely sensitive and aren't meant to be contained.

[Tryingtostayyoung]

Zootsuit I think I saw them in m&s but they don't call them seam free, I think they called them ultimate comfort!! Good luck!!

In going to try out some of the tips that were given here tomorrow so fingers crossed!

[ZootSuit]

This all sounds so familiar, and I'm hopeful that children do grow out of it as they get older. Can identify with most things here for my 4yo dd. Sock seams have to be perfectly over her toes, her latest thing is to stand with her feet together to make sure the seams of left and right feet match up! Tights have to be perfectly in place (Next ones have proved to be my saviour at the moment!). Ponytail must be tight and dead centre otherwise it's not right. Refuses point blank to wear leggings. Jeans and tights must not "crinkle", ie they must be the perfect leg length (not easy to find!). The list goes on!

My friend had the same issues and found seam free socks on the sock shop website, keep meaning to check them out.

[redexpat]

I carried DS into the car with no socks on the other day because he was screaming about it. Then he started screaming that he wanted his socks. I didnt engage until we were inside nursery. WHen he started playing up a few days later I told him that if he didnt get dressed he would be going to nursery in his pants. Never seen him move so fast.

[Tryingtostayyoung]

No thankfully I haven't had any issues with cutlery, plates or anything but I feel your pain

[Tryingtostayyoung]

Again some more great ideas, thank you all so much, it's given me some great new approaches to try

Oh god, seat belts, I forgot about the bloody seatbelt!! I've just gotten used to the screaming once she's in the car for 15mins until she calms down, it's horrendous!!

[Janecc]

DD would only drink out of pink cup for ages or burst into tears. Same deal with cutlery and plates. When you say displayed - things like food not touching other food for example? Yes I am the wearer of the t shirt. Not cheekyimo. Just a phase.

[RunnerOnTheRun]

Another issue non clothes related, does anyone else have a child who insists on certain cutlery/plates/cups and food displayed in certain ways/bowls filled to a certain level? Is it OCD or just plain cheeky??

[Janecc]

unimsginativr13. It's Sensory processing disorder. Some people can have issues without hsving the disorder. My DD has some other issues, not saying she has the disorder. Things like bright lights, loud sounds, food textures csn also can be issues.

[Notcontent]

It's reasonably common and with some children you just have to accept it. It was a big issue for my dd at that age. It's much better now, but at 9 she still sometimes has issues with sock seams, anything itchy, etc.

[RunnerOnTheRun]

It is definitely nice to have others in the same boat!

One day I found it helped to put the clothes in front of Peppa Pig on the telly. It worked once or twice.

We have purchased school socks for September already, in the smaller size so they are skin tight.

Sleeves coming up inside coats is also an issue but she has learned to grip them in her fist first!

Oh, forgot to mention SEATBELTS!!! Tight, then loose, then just right. It is NEVER right. Spoils all our journeys.

[candykane25]

Try changing the routine. So if she's got used to this habit, break the habit.
Try taking her outfit to a different room. Dress her at a different part of the routine. Emphasis on what you would like her to do. Don't talk about what you don't want her to do. Talk about how WE do it. "In this house WE put our clothes on before we go outside" "in our fsmily we like to wear socks and shoes". "In our house we cooperate and work as a team". Belonging to a group is very persuasive.
And bribery. We have a treasure box with cheap knick knacks in it. If DD cooperates, she gets to choose some treasure.
Good luck!

[Tryingtostayyoung]

Sorry hat was supposed to say vest (think I'm just excited to have people to share my pain with)

[Tryingtostayyoung]

It seems like socks are the reoccurring thing, I wonder why?! That, sleeves rolling up when your coat goes on, leggings touching her thighs too much (but won't wear trousers because they are "too baggy") and her best "jumping up" are definitely my DD's biggest triggers. Although the hair issue has just started today I can tell from her reaction to it that it's going to be a biggie!! God help me

[RunnerOnTheRun]

HORRENDOUS here with DD3.
Now age 4.5

Our issues:
SUPER tight pony tails - now we are down to perfect bunchie plaits (I don't care as long as it's tied somehow for nursery).

Requirement for SUPER skin tight leggings - now not so bad, but only has maybe 3 pairs out of 15 that she will wear so I am a slave to the washing machine

EVERY DAY: FUCKING SOCK SEAMS

We have so many beautiful clothes, socks and shoes that she just won't wear and I am really dreading all the new worries school uniform will bring in September.

She spoils every single morning for DD1 and DS2.

[unimaginative13]

Isn't there an actual sensory thing regarding clothes?

Like children are haven't a real issue with the feel of it in their skin, I'm sure I read a thread about it once.

[Janecc]

Sticker chart also worked well.