to be hurt my DD (6) doesn't call me mummy anymore?

[officebairn]

Am I being a big baby or is that a little bit early?

I've asked my DH to always say 'Oh show it to Mummy' or 'See what Mum thinks of that' etc. but he doesn't. He often calls me my first name in front of them and to them. It's sort of upsetting because it's clearly rubbed off on her and she's stopped calling me Mummy or Mum at all now.

Anyone else had this? Is it hopefully just a phase?

[GhoulWithADragonTattoo]

My 6 year old DS has started calling me 'mate' so it could be worse! My DD used to call her dad by his first name. We'd laugh it off and she doesn't do it so much now. I think it's because I call DH by his first name while he calls me 'mum' in front of DCs.

[Charley50]

My DS is 12 and still calls me mummy. I do love it. I understand you feeling sad and think your DH should listen to your feelings on this.

[ohtheholidays]

Like other posters I still address my aunties and Uncles as Auntie/Uncle and they're name and it's the same with cards and I'm 40.And all of our children address them as Auntie/Uncle and they've always called my BF Auntie and her name and they call her soon 2bH Uncle and his name and they always buy niece and newphew cards for our children and my Aunts and Uncles still send Niece/nephew cards to me,my DH and our 5DC.

My nephews and nieces call me Auntie and my Name usually and they're all adults and have children of they're own.Although one of my nieces usually calls me Mum as sadly she doesn't really have a relationship with her Mum but she's always had a very close relationship to me but my husband she calls Uncle and his name.

[ohtheholidays]

I'd be hurt to OP.All 5 of our DC still call me Mum/Mummy.

My DH has always called me Mum/Mummy to the children and I've always called him Dad/Daddy to the children.

Not me but our 2 oldest DS's(now 19 and 17)Dad(my ex husband)went mad when our oldest called him by his first name,he was only 3 at the time and he'd heard his cousins(all my nephews and nieces)constantly calling him Uncle and his name so just called him what he'd heard him being called for ages.
I talked his Dad down and DS never did it again bless him.

They have come home from school and called me Miss before bless them and I got called Mum numerous times when I was teaching which was fine when teaching in the nurserys but when it was in Primary the poor children that slipped up looked mortified bless them,that was until one of they're friends had slipped up and called me the same

I'd just keep correcting your DD and I'd have a word with your husband and let him know just how much it upsets you.

[Mandy61]

I felt really sad when my DS stopped calling me Mummy when he was about 5 but I thought about it and told him that being his Mummy was really important to me and I loved him calling me Mummy. I've been Mummy (or Mum since)

[EatingMyWords]

My DS calls me by my name by copying DH when he's speaking to me, even though DH says 'ask mummy' when he's talking to my son. DS also calls me Mummy sometimes. Oddly enough he seems to be able to understand I have a name as well as being Mummy- some of the horrified adults here don't seem to be able to grasp this

Is it really that terrible to be called by your own name? It isn't as if anyone is denying you're the child's mother by doing that!

[Seren85]

If your children calling you by your first name is ok with you then go for it but I do think OP's husband is being unreasonable with the "take it to Nat" thing. I've always called my parents Mum/Dad and now I'm 31 they still refer to each other (to me) that way e.g. No I don't know where the wallpaper table is, I'll ask your Dad when he gets in from work. They've always adressed each other by their first names even in front of us kids but its never occurred to me to use those names other than occasionally in jest!

[WhoKnowsWhereTheTimeG0es]

Do you mean in your job Hels? If I'm calling someone about one of my DCs I tend to say "It's Jane (White) here, John (Black)'s mum" just to clarify.

[BeardMinge]

I am my cat's mum, nowt wrong with that. We adopted him, we are his parents. Boak away.

I went through phases of calling my dad by his name when I was a kid. I thought I was sooo amusing as ot clearly irritated him. Then one day my mum explained that the reason he didn't like it was because he'd waited a long time to be a dad, and I was the only person who could call him 'dad', so it was special. I still call him Johnny occasionally though (I'm 42), just for shits and giggles.

I would prefer my daughter to calm me 'mama' forever, it makes my heart melt. So yeah OP, your husband is being weird.

[villainousbroodmare]

HelsBels
Slightly off topic, but did you know what a breathtakingly large number of people refer to themselves, without irony, as the Mummy or Daddy of their pets? Triple boak.

[HelsBels3000]

What is a million times worse is receiving a phone call from a parent 'oh its Toby's Mummy here' - no your name is Emma to me, not Toby's Mummy. ARGGHHHHHHH. I even had Toby's Grandma in to speak to me one day, she said 'oh I believe Toby's Mummy has mentioned to you already that I am coming in to help' - not my daughter, or Mrs Smith, or Emma Smith, or even Emma - but Toby's Mummy. Boak.

[blankmind]

When she was about eight, my dd who is an only, asked if she could use my first name. I didn't mind either way and said it was her choice. I told her that everyone I know can call me by my first name, but she was the only person in the whole world who could call me Mum(my)

She chose to call me Mum(my) and still does as an adult.

[LordEmsworth]

Didn't want to correct her as technically she's not wrong and it might confuse her more

But, she is wrong, surely? When she starts school and addresses the teacher by their first name, presumably you'll correct her. When she goes to the doctor, presumably it's Dr Smith not their first name. And should she ever meet the Queen, presumably she won't address her as "Liz".

What a great opportunity to talk to her about manners and other people, and to emphasise the how the 2 of you have a unique relationship and how special it is that she can call you Mummy.

I don't think you should be hurt - she is just copying everyone else and learning how social interaction works, how can she understand if you don't tell her?

I don't understand why you wouldn't correct her. But then I am nearly 40 and I wouldn't dare address my mum by her first name

[WhoKnowsWhereTheTimeG0es]

I think 6 is about right to switch from Mummy to Mum, but whatever you prefer your DH should be supporting you by referring to you by that name in front of your DCs.

As for Aunty etc, I sometimes still refer to some of mine using Aunty though I'm in my late 40s, so do my parents, it's just habit. I can't abide being called it myself though, I encourage my nieces (17,15 and 12) to use my first name.

[SalemSaberhagen]

My 17 month old has just started calling me by my name rather than mummy. It makes me laugh! I do hope it's just a phase though.

[monkeymamma]

Momamum, my dniece is 23 and I'm 33 but we still use the 'auntie'. I'm never sure if it's ironic or not!! For me I dread coming across as embarrassingly desperate to be cool and down with the kids, so always sign cards 'auntie monkeymamma' and just hope that if she's being ironic then she'll assume I am too. Actually what I find hard is knowing what my dc should call her - she is more like auntie age to them but 'cousin soandso' sounds oddly Victorian! First name only seems disrespectful on their part as she is an adult and they are tiddlers...

[monkeymamma]

I find your dh's habits really strange OP!
Dh and I actually ADDRESS each other as 'mummy' and 'daddy' while the kids are around. Which is also a bit wrong but it seems to have crept in and is a hard habit to break. When they're in bed we always call each other by our nicknames, never ever ever our Christian names which I would find overly formal and awkward.
First name would be fine if it was what you wanted. But your dh is very unkind to do this.
4yo ds calls us mummy and daddy but also switches to mum and dad about 10% of the time. It's natural to change eventually I think. What I really miss is being 'mama' when he was a little baby and only just learning to speak!!

[SirVixofVixHall]

Momamum, we all refer to Aunts and Aunties in my family as "Aunt Elen" or whatever. My cousins still call my Mum their Aunt even though she is 84. Very normal in lots of families. My mother always talked about her sister to me as "your Aunt..."

[FithColumnist]

Out of interest, OP, what does she call your DH? If it's not his first name, then he is being massively dickish.

[TaliZorahVasNormandy]

It'd annoy me tbh. When talking to DD's dad, I will use his name. If I'm referring to him when talking to DD, then I'll use daddy. He does the same in reverse.

[Momamum]

Slightly off tack, but what do you think of this?

A neighbour is 84, her daughter is 61, neighbour's sis- in-l is named June. And neighbour still refers to June as "your auntie June" to her daughter, even though there's no other June in the family..

Just...why?

To me there comes a time when 'auntie' etc.is dropped, particularly when the niece is an OAP and there's no-one else in the family with that name to be confused with?

[VagueIdeas]

Didn't want to correct her as technically she's not wrong and it might confuse her more

That's nonsense. She isn't confused, she's just mirroring her dad. She's old enough to know that Mummy and Daddy have names but she doesn't need to use them.

I totally agree that calling you "Nat" so deliberately makes you sound like a colleague. I actually think think it sounds cold and loveless.

Is everything ok in your marriage? Is there any chance he's trying to undermine you or mess with your head?

[RabbitSaysWoof]

It's not unreasonable of you to tell her tho that your name to her is Mum or Mummy if it hurts your feelings, and your dh is being a cock encouraging it, how hard is it to remember? As others have said I would stop answering to it.
What if she found out her teachers name is Sue and prefered that to Miss Young or whatever, can she choose to call her Sue even if that is disrespectful to the teacher? Should her feeling grown up be the most important thing?

[SirVixofVixHall]

My dd tried to do this v briefly, when she was about 4. I pointed out that anyone can call me SirVix, but only she and her sister get to call me Mama, and so it was really special and important to me. She didn't do it again. I have friends who call their dad "Robert" but their Mother "Mum", and it is rather odd, it makes him seem like the lodger..!

[00100001]

if you're not prepared to do anything about it - stop complaining